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FAMILY RELIGION, 



OR THE 

S 



DOMESTIC RELATIONS 



AS 



REGULATED BY CHRISTIAN PRINCIPLES. 



BY THE 

Rev. B. M. SMITH, 

PROFESSOR IN UNION THEOLOGICAL SEMINARY, VIRGINIA. 



A PRIZE ESSAY. 




PHILADELPHIA : 
PRESBYTERIAN BOARD OF PUBLICATION, 

No. 821 Chestnut Street. 




Entered according to the Act of Congress, in the year 1859, by 
JAMBS DUNLAP, Treas., 

in the Clerk's Office of the District Court for the Eastern District of 
Pennsylvania. 



STEREOTYPED BY JESPER HARDING & SON, PHILADELPHIA* 



ADVERTISEMENT. 



A gentleman in the southern part of our country, in 
the earnest hope of more fully directing attention to the 
importance of the Family Constitution, proposed to give 
a prize of two hundred dollars for the most approved 
treatise on the obligations imposed by religion in the 
family, with particular reference to the present aspect of 
the subject. 

The proposed prize essay was to be thrown open to 
competition, and the Presbyterian Board of Publication 
was selected, as the medium of communication, to pub- 
lish the proposals, receive manuscripts, and determine 
the successful candidate. 

Within the limited time, sixteen essays of various 

3 



4 ADVERTISEMENT. 

4f> 

grades of merit were received, and the following one was 
adjudged worthy of the prize. This essay exhibits a 
just appreciation of the great ethical duties involved in 
the discussion, and, as is believed, is written with more 
than ordinary vigour and freshness. It is submitted to 
the candid perusal of the reader with the hope that it 
may prove serviceable at a time when, through indiffer- 
ence or mistaken judgment, very erroneous views are 
entertained in regard to parental and filial duties. Were 
the relations which result from the family compact 
rightly comprehended and sacredly observed ; the obli- 
gations resting on every family to reverence and worship 
God properly developed ; and the practical methods of 
organizing households on a scriptural model forcibly il- 
lustrated, a new order of things might reasonably be an- 
ticipated. Reform in the family would soon diffuse it- 
self throughout the whole constitution of society, a 
higher tone of morals would be inspired, and not only 
would the moral influence of the church be enlarged, 
but the stability and security of the state be perpetu- 
ated. 

Whatever, therefore, may tend to arrest attention to 
this subject and enlighten the public judgment should be 
encouraged; and especially is it incumbent on the Chris- 
tian community to promote the circulation of well digested 
views on the family constitution as lying at the basis of 



ADVERTISEMENT. 



5 



all that is excellent and praiseworthy in human society 
at large. These benefits, it is confidently hoped, will be 
promoted by the careful consideration of the ensuing 
treatise. 

Editor of the Board. 

i* 



JE t m o x 2 
OF MY MOTHER; 
THROUGH WHOSE PRAYERS, TEACHING, 
AND EXAMPLE IN HER FAMILY, 

BY THE GRACE OF GOD, 
I "WAS LED TO KNOW 
THE TRUTH OF THE GOSPEL; 
THIS VOLUME IS, 
WITH TENDER RECOLLECTIONS, 
AFFECTIONATELY INSCRIBED. 



CONTENTS. 



PAGE 

Introduction 9 

CHAPTER I. 

The nature, design, and importance op the family constitution. 17 

Section I. — The Nature of the family constitution 17 

Sect. II. — The Design of the family constitution 30 

Sect. III. — The Importance of the family constitution 39 

CHAPTER II. 

The duties and responsibilities belonging to the family consti- 
tution 43 

Sect. L— Responsibilities and duties common to all the Members 

of the Family 43 

Sect. II. — Responsibilities and duties of Husbands and Wives 61 

Sect. III. — Responsibilities and duties of Parents 46 

Sect. IV. — Responsibilities and duties of Children 81 

Sect. V. — Responsibilities and duties of Masters and Servants 96 

C HAPTER III. 

The best means to secure the ends designed by the family con- 
stitution Ill 

Sect. I. — Family government 112 

Sect. II. — Physical education 121 

Sect. III. — Mental education 125 

Sect. IV. — Religious education 129 

Sect. V. — Infant Baptism 134 

Sect. VI.— The Sabbath and the Sanctuary 135 

Sect. VII. — Family worship 138 

Sect. VIII.— Means for the religious improvement of Servants 145 

m 



8 



CONTENTS. 



CHAPTER IV. 

PAGE 

The relation op the family to the church 152 

Sect. I. — The family a means for enlarging the Church 155 

Sect. II. — The family an aid to the pastor's labours 157 

^Sect. III. — The family a nursery of active Church members 158 

Sect. IV. — The family an aid to the devotional services of the 

Church 160 

Sect. V. — The family prepares officers for the Church 164 

CHAPTER V. 

The value, difficulties, and aids to family religion 168 

Sect. I. — The Value of religion in the family 170 

Sect. II. — The Difficulties of family religion 181 

Sect. III. — The Aids to family religion 185 

CHAPTER VI. 



The pleas for neglect and delinquencies in family duties . 



190 



INTRODUCTION. 



The Bible alone gives us an authentic account of the 
origin of our race, its earliest form of social organiza- 
tion, and the institution of the first means for its moral 
culture. " God created man in his own image ; in the 
image of God created he him ; male and female created 
he them." Gen. i. 27. 4 'And the Lord caused a deep 
sleep to fall upon Adam, and he slept ; and he took one 
of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof. And 
the rib which the Lord God had taken from man, made he 
a woman, and brought her unto the man. And Adam said, 
This is now bone of my bone, and flesh of my flesh : She 
shall be called woman, because she was taken out of man." 
Gen. ii. 21-23. " He which made them at the begin- 
ning made them male and female, and said, For this 
cause, shall a man leave father and mother, and shall 
cleave to his wife ; and they twain shall be one flesh. 

(9) 



10 



INTRODUCTION. 



Wherefore they are no more twain but one flesh." — 
Matt. xix. 4-6. 

Such was the foundation of the Family constitution. 
It was the first social organization, the germ and the 
pattern of all others. Adam and Eve constituted a fa- 
mily, jand were thus constituted by God. As yet, there 
could be no civil government, no municipal laws, no 
magistrates and governors, and no provision for the ex- 
ercise of any political power, for there were no subjects. 
Nor could there as yet exist an organized church, involv- 
ing the idea of a ministry, the administration of sacra- 
ments, and the existence and operation of a government. 
Nor could there be any artificial educational institutions 
such as schools, academies, or other systems of instruc- 
tion. Our first parents found within the limits of the 
family constitution, the essential means for securing to 
themselves and to their children, the benefits and advan- 
tages of government, school, and church. 

Any other theory of the family constitution will prove 
to be a mere figment of infidel speculation. In the sub- 
sequent history of man, given in the Scriptures, we dis- 
cover evident traces of just such a family constitution as 
has now been presented. With the increase of popula- 
tion other forms of social organization arose, but they 
preserved the characteristic features of this. The pa- 
triarchal system, which we find exemplified in the histo- 



INTRODUCTION. 



11 



ries of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob, is but an extension 
of the family. The "heads of the house of their fa- 
thers," (Josh. xxii. 14,) is an expression, which denotes 
the transition from an organization, of which the living 
family ancestor was the first in authority, to the more 
artificial arrangement, by which the government^' of a 
tribe or family connection was delegated to some other 
member. The frequent and familiar use of "house," 
for family, is another illustration of the position ; and the 
municipal government, established by Moses, recognizes 
the principle of a family constitution, in the name and 
ofiice of the " elders," whom he appointed rulers of the 
people. 

So also an investigation of the most ancient and re- 
liable uninspired histories of man, evinces the existence 
of the family constitution, as precedent to all other forms 
of social organization. It did not arise from any conven- 
tional compact. It was not the artificial arrangement 
of man, first living in herds, like the lower animals, and 
forming promiscuous and transient social relations, and 
thi*s gradually emerging into the order and permanent 
constitution of a well ordered household ; but " from the 
beginning" the union of "one man and one woman," 
was established by God and ordained to be the founda- 
tion of an organization, which should be the unit and 
element and support of all others, for man's right gov- 



12 



INTRODUCTION. 



ernment and culture. Indeed we may trace among the 
lower animals themselves, some evident indications of an 
arrangement somewhat similar. During the minority 
of their young, the parents instinctively unite in meeting 
the calls of that dependence which their offspring as in- 
stinctively feel towards them. A common speciality of 
nature, form, and habits pertains to the various classes 
.of animals, and our use of the "w or d family for designating 
such classes is a recognition of the facts, which illus- 
trate our position. And not only so, but even in the 
vegetable world, there prevails a similar distinction de- 
signated by the same term. That such a mode of exis- 
tence of the lower animals arises from the instincts of their 
nature, which prompts the dependent feeling of the off- 
spring, and the protecting care of the parent, by no 
means sets aside our claims to the fact, as a teaching of 
analogy on our proposition ; for these instincts are of 
God's ordering. What the Deist ascribes to the law 
of nature, we ascribe to the law of the God of nature ; 
for there are no laws of nature, except those laws of God, 
by which he governs the natural world. What, therefore, 
we are taught in his word to believe to be the foundation 
of the family constitution, we might be led by the right 
exercise of reason, on the facts set before us, in the past 
and present state and order of nature, to conclude to 
be such. 



INTRODUCTION. 



13 



When God had created man and established the fa- 
mily, "He blessed the seventh day and sanctified it." 
Gen. ii. 3. Moses perhaps alludes to this institution 
of the Sabbath in the use of the word " Remember," 
with which he introduces the fourth commandment. Ex. 
xx. 8-12. For, in the opinion of the best interpreters 
of Scripture, there are intimations to be found, in the 
patriarchal history, (cf. Gen. viii. 6-14; xxix. 27,) that 
the Sabbath was observed by the worshippers of God, 
and from Ex. xvi. 5, 22-29, it is very clear that its 
observance was required previous to the giving of the 
law at Sinai. We thus feel justified in understanding, 
by the terms used by Moses in the account of the insti- 
tution of the Sabbath, that it was originally designed to 
subserve other purposes than that of a bodily rest. It 
was an institution for man's moral culture. Coeval with 
the family constitution, it was God's appointed means, 
by which the religious culture of the family should be 
promoted. It was a day selected and set apart from all 
others, as sacred to the worship of God, in which man, 
released from the laborious, though innocent employ- 
ments of other days, might cultivate his spiritual nature 
and become perfect in holiness. 

We do not know what would have been the methods 
of God's providence to the human race had Adam per- 
severed in a state of innocence. It has been generally 
2 



14 INTRODUCTION. 

supposed that, as just suggested, he would have become 
" perfect in holiness," and would have transmitted 
his holy nature to his posterity. Thus the multiplica- 
tion of the race would have been that of holy beings. 
Inasmuch as Adam's son, born after the fall, was born 
in the image of his sinful father, (Gen. v. 3. Rom. v. 
12-19,) such a supposition is not without reason. As 
Adam was created in the image of God, (Gen. i. 26,) an 
image consisting, doubtless, in " knowledge, righteous- 
ness, and holiness," (Eph. iv. 24. Col. iii. 10. L. Cat. Q. 
17,) his descendants would all have thus reflected the holy 
image of the common Author of their being, at once illus- 
trating his perfections and showing forth his glory. 
Thus by the combined agency of these two most ancient 
institutions, the family and the Sabbath, the world would 
have been peopled with a race of holy beings, who prob- 
ably, by some suitable method, would have been trans- 
ferred to some more permanent abode. 

Whatever confidence may be reposed in these sugges- 
tions, which, however plausible, are neither articles of 
faith, nor essential to our spiritual edification, it must be 
conceded, that for the purposes of promoting man's con- 
tinuance in primitive purity and happiness, the right 
observance of the Sabbath and the religious principles and 
practices of parents of families, fully imbued with the 
spirit of piety, would have proved very efficient. The 



INTRODUCTION. 15 

use of means for sanctification would not be inconsistent 
with the Divine purpose towards man, any more than 
under the present dispensation. The peculiar means of 
grace connected with the gospel remedy, would not, of 
course, have been needed, and yet that " holy resting" of 
the Sabbath which is essential to an increase of holiness 
now, might have been equally demanded by the exigen- 
cies of sinless beings. 

These are the only institutions of Eden, of which we 
have any account, which have survived the ruins of the 
fall. Though sadly impaired in all their elements of ben- 
efit to man, by that depravity of his nature, which often 
impedes the operation of God's most benevolent designs, 
and converts even blessings into curses, they still re- 
main to us, in our fallen estate, at once the monu- 
ments of God's wise care for our welfare, and the valuable 
means for promoting our restoration to the purity and 
bliss of Eden. However much man has lost of the Divine 
image, in which he was created, these works of the Divine 
wisdom still remain "very good;" and even man's apos- 
tasy has not been permitted entirely to deprive him of 
their important aid to his moral improvement. 

Of the aid which the family constitution is adapted to 
provide, it is our purpose to speak, in the following 
chapters. Following substantially the order of discus- 
sion prescribed by the benevolent gentleman who has 



16 



INTRODUCTORY. 



called for this little work, we shall consider the nature, 
design, and importance of the family constitution ; the 
duties and responsibilities belonging to it, as they pertain 
to the several members of a family, and are taught in the 
holy Scriptures; the best means to secure the ends, 
which appear, from a view of its nature, to have been de- 
signed by it ; the relation which the family, according to 
its Scriptural constitution, bears to the church ; the value, 
difficulties, and aids to family religion ; and the pleas for 
neglect and delinquencies in family duties, offered by 
those who are indifferent or indisposed to their perform- 
ance. 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



CHAPTER I. 

THE NATURE, DESIGN, AND IMPORTANCE OF THE FAMILY 
CONSTITUTION. 

Sect. L The nature of the family constitution. 

According to the Scriptural account of the founda- 
tion of the family constitution, it consists, in its simplest 
form, in the marriage union of one man and one woman. 
Other members of the family are children, the fruits of 
such a union, and servants, transiently or permanently 
connected with this social organization. In a less accu- 
rate sense, other persons, temporarily inmates of the family 
residence, may also be included. An imperfect family 
organization is sometimes effected, when unmarried bro- 
thers or sisters, or both brothers and sisters are associated 
according to the principles, as to a common residence or 
common means of support, or both, which regulate the 
structure of ordinary families, so far as they are appli- 
cable to their peculiar condition. The death of either 
husband or wife does not necessarily destroy the organiza- 
tion of the household, though, of course, its efficiency is im- 
paired, for the duties of both partners then devolve on the 
2 * ( 17 ) 



18 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



survivor ; and as they are, in many respects, duties of very 
different nature, the whole cannot be as well performed 
by one as by both. 

1. As the prime element of the family constitution is 
marriage, it is pertinent to our present purpose to offer a 
few suggestions touching the principles which should 
govern the formation of this relation. 

(1.) Our Directory for Worship teaches, that " marriage 
is to be between one man and one woman only." Chap, 
xi. 3. Such was the law of its institution, " from the 
beginning," and such was, especially, reenacted by our Sa- 
viour. The union thus formed is obligatory till the death 
of one of the parties, unless there be a violation of the 
marriage vow by either, or that wilful and protracted 
desertion which implies the existence of such viola- 
tion. Matt. xix. 4-9. 

All theories and practices of men contrary to this fun- 
damental law of marriage, whether by legalized poly- 
gamy, or concubinage, or by divorces for any other 
cause than that just stated, or some contingency mani- 
festly implying its exsitence, or by any other avowed 
or unavowed evasions of the obligations of the married 
state, have arisen from the perverted judgments of men's 
minds or the depraved lusts of their hearts, and have re- 
sulted in evil, and "only evil and that continually," ex- 
cept when such results have been modified by the kind pro- 
vidence of God. Whatever views may be entertained 
of the violations of this law by the patriarchs and others 
to whose piety the Scriptures bear witness, it is a signifi- 
cant fact, that along with most of the prominent instances 
of such violation, of which a record has been given, there 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



19 



is also presented on account of some sad result, clearly- 
traceable to such violation. The ill treatment of Ha- 
gar, the feuds and artifices of Jacob's family, the suf- 
ferings of Hannah, the domestic misfortunes of David, 
and the alienation of Solomon's heart from the service 
of God, seem to have been recorded as beacons. We 
need not discuss the various theories by which divines 
have undertaken to account for the facts to which we 
have alluded. God might, in the exercise of his sover- 
eign authority, for wise reasons, suspend the law. 
Thus, in view of the disastrous wars which destroyed so 
many males, he may have been pleased thus to provide 
for a proper increase of population; or he may have 
permitted relations to remain undisturbed, though their 
formation was a sin, because greater evils might have re- 
sulted from their disruption. Or, what is more probable, 
in view of the record of evil results, such violations of the 
law were regarded by God as sinful, of which, however, 
his true servants may have been guilty, and for which 
they must have repented. That they might not have ap- 
peared to those perpetrating them so exceedingly sinful 
as they do to us, is easily explained by bearing in mind 
the state of morals among surrounding people, and the 
influence produced by the customs of others, on the sen- 
timents of pious men. Our Saviour ascribes the tolera- 
tion of divorce, as practised among the Jews, to the 
" hardness of their hearts." The record on which they 
based the custom of divorce, for trivial causes, was a per- 
mission not a command, Deut. xxiv. 1-4, and as the law 
required a formal separation, it was a testimony to the 
sanctity of the marriage relation. 



20 



FAMILY KELIGION. 



But of the scripturalness of the law of marriage as we 
have given it, there can now be no doubt, on the minds 
of any, who receive God's word as the end of contro- 
versy. 

(2.) As this important union is distinguished by such 
restrictions, and when formed, attended with momentous 
consequences to the parties, their friends, and especially the 
family to which it may give rise, it should be the result 
of a decided and mutual attachment of the persons, by 
whom it is formed. We do not mean to aver, that the 
want of such an attachment, at the time of marriage, so 
vitiates the relation, that the important and interesting 
results contemplated by it, are perpetually forfeited. 
For such attachment may afterwards arise ; but should it 
never exist, or should one of the parties fail to entertain 
a true conjugal affection, there can be no such family con- 
stitution as the Scriptures propose. Such as arises from 
a union under these circumstances, is vitiated in a most 
essential element of success, in respect to the ends to be 
secured. 

Without adopting the nauseating sentimentalism on 
this subject, which forms so much of the staple of tales 
and novels ; we must on the other hand, express the con- 
viction, that no persons can safely contract this union, 
unless affected by a decided and warm attachment for 
each other, based on a mutual respect and esteem, the 
results of a proper acquaintance, and the only satisfactory 
foundation of a true and lasting confidence. Such an 
affection by no means excludes that passion which draws 
the sexes together, but regulates its influence and subor- 
dinates its exercise to the higher motives, which should 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



21 



prevail in the selection of a husband or wife. Under its 
sole influence that personal attachment, which should be 
as perpetual as the marriage relation, and ever increas- 
ing, becomes a fitful caprice; violent it may be, but 
transient, and liable at any moment, to be superseded 
by the "expulsive power of anew affection" for some 
other object. Hence "love at first sight," and a pre- 
cipitate marriage, often involve one or both of the parties 
in the miserable destiny of those who spend years of 
fruitless regrets, or by violations of the marriage vow, 
bring on themselves, their children, and their friends irre- 
parable disgrace. Such marriages may, indeed, lead to fa- 
vourable results, because the impressions of an hour may 
be confirmed by more intimate acquaintance ; but, ordi- 
narily, no rightly constituted family springs from such 
inconsiderate unions. Nor can such a family consti- 
tution as the Scriptures contemplate be expected to 
result from marriages of convenience or pecuniary inter- 
est, whether contracted by the parties themselves, or by 
others having a real or supposed right to control their 
choice. Whether increase of wealth, or enhancement of 
social position, or any similar reason induces the mar- 
riage, unless affection should afterwards intervene, most 
deplorable evils must result. The obliged party, whether 
male or female, will either become the abject vassal of 
the other, or mutual recriminations and perpetually 
growing estrangements will distinguish an intercourse, 
which should be that of affection and confidence, and 
infect in their sad consequences the entire family consti- 
tution, which may take its rise in the ill-fated union. 
Among the causes of ill-assorted unions, the want of a 



22 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



true Christian faith, on the part of either husband or 
wife, has been sometimes assigned, and the words of Paul, 
"Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers," 
(2 Cor. vi. 14,) have been quoted to sustain this opinion. 
It is at least doubtful, whether the apostle had this rela- 
tion especially in view. Supposing such to have been the 
fact, then it must be borne in mind, that the "unbeliever" 
among the Corinthians, was one who openly and pro- 
fanely rejected Christ. By us, it is used in the wide 
sense, so as to denote any non-professor, and it may be 
questioned, whether the prohibition, admitting that it 
refers to marriage, would be correctly interpreted, so as 
to make the marriage with any other than a professing 
Christian, scripturally unlawful. Many such " unbe- 
lievers" though, alas! truly "out of Christ," are per- 
sons of good morals and pious education, and are re- 
spectful hearers of the word, who may be "won by the 
conversation," or pious conduct, of a Christian compan- 
- ion. Still great caution need be used in selecting a 
partner for life, from among those who are not the pro- 
fessed people of God : and certainly a selection of such 
as are notoriously profane, drunken, or debauched in any 
way by sinful lusts, must materially mar the family con- 
stitution, if not utterly destroy those agencies for good, 
with which it has been provided. 

The space allotted to this discussion of the true doc- 
trine of marriage, should not be regarded as dispropor- 
tioned to the intrinsic importance of the subject. In- 
deed there are reasons for regretting that we cannot en- 
ter more fully on the discussion. For there are ominous 
indications that very loose views are increasingly preva- 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



23 



lent in many parts of our country ; and there is a strong 
tendency manifested, to set aside the ordinance of God 
for the commandments and traditions of men. The in- 
creased facility with which divorces may be obtained, on 
very trivial grounds ; the frequent violations of the mar- 
riage vow in the influential stations of society ; the noto- 
riously glaring and publicly advocated violation of God's 
law, by a whole community, in one of our Territories ; 
and the licentiousness, which, open or concealed, marks 
the character of many schemes of professed improvement ; 
all together call on all who love the welfare of our country, 
to lift up a warning voice, and rally around this divinely 
inspired and fundamental law of the family constitution. 

2. We have seen (p. 10) that the family, as originally 
constituted, offered to its members the advantages of a 
school, a government, and a church. Notwithstanding 
the sad change in man's relations to God, by his fall 
from an estate of holiness into that of sin and misery, 
a proper family constitution is still, essentially, an or- 
ganization for government, and secular and religious in- 
struction. 

(1.) In the law prescribing the relation of Eve to Adam 
after the fall, she was placed under his authority. " He 
shall rule over thee." Gen. iii. 16. Such was evidently 
the normal relation of the wife in all those families, of 
which a history is given in the Old Testament, and such 
is the purport of apostolic teaching, when inculcating the 
duties of wives. Col. iii. 18. 1 Peter iii. 1. By the terms of 
the fourth and fifth commandments, children and servants 
are recognized as subject to the father and master, (L. 
Cat. Q. 124;) and in the fourth, even " the stranger," 



24 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



within the family precincts, is placed in a similiar subor- 
dination. These teachings of the Old Testament are also 
confirmed by those of the New. Here then is an organ- 
ized government, the authority of which is vested in the 
husband, father, and master. The subjection of the wife 
is not, indeed, of the same sort as that of the children and 
servants. She is the partner of her husband as well as 
his subject, identified with him in a common interest and 
in their common relations to others. Thus our Saviour 
teaches; "they are no more twain but one flesh," Matt, 
xix. 5, and Paul says " men ought to love their wives as 
their own bodies : he that loveth his wife, loveth himself." 
Eph. v. 28. The children are required to obey their 
parents, (Eph. vi. 1,) the mother, as well as the father ; and 
the obedience to masters required of servants (vi. 5.) im- 
plies the obligation to render it to mistresses. Still it is 
a significant fact that in the very connection in which Paul 
teaches the identification of husband and wife, he expli- 
citly asserts that the " husband is the head of the wife," 
that wives " should be subject to their husbands in every 
thing." Eph. v. 23, 24. 

The government of the family is then a monarchy. 
But though a monarchy, it is not necessarily a tyranny. 
Eor the law which prescribes the subjection, modifies it very 
materially, by two limiting enactments. Husbands are 
required to love and cherish their wives, deal tenderly 
with their children, (Eph. vi. 4,) and justly with their ser- 
vants, (Col. iv. 1,) and the obedience exacted of the sub- 
jects of this government is to be rendered " in the Lord," 
i. e., in a Christian manner or on Christian principles ; and 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



25 



of course the family ruler must exact that obedience in 
the same manner. 

Cases may occur, in which this supreme power neces- 
sarily devolves on the wife ; as when the husband, by rea- 
son of bodily or mental infirmity, is manifestly incapable 
of its exercise ; and, of course, when he may have been 
removed by death. There are also, in our sinful world, 
but too many instances of its abuse. The head of the 
family sometimes becomes its oppressor, so that wife, 
children, and servants are made the victims of ruthless 
acts of passion and caprice. In view of such cases, 
there are those who are disposed to ascribe the lamenta- 
ble evils which are suffered to the institution itself. But 
it has been found impossible to construct a substitute. 
Even when human laws have undertaken to remedy some 
of the lesser evils flowing from badly governed house- 
holds, they have, but too often, occasioned greater than 
they relieved. The evils of which we complain are due 
to sin, not to the institution itself. If to remove them, 
it be abolished, we shall find that we have also destroyed 
an agency for good. It is better to content ourselves 
with the structure which G-od has raised, even though 
its beauty be marred by sin, than by its destruction to 
bring on ourselves even greater calamities, to which our 
necessarily imperfect substitutes must be equally or more 
liable, and to which they will offer but little compensa- 
tory benefit. 

It deserves our remark, however, that the family con- 
stitution is no less a government when that government 
is badly administered. Of the responsibility which that 

fact imposes on those who rule, and the results involved 
3 



26 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



as to those who are ruled, we shall have occasion to speak 
elsewhere. 

(2.) As an organization for instruction, both secular 
and religious, we find in the family constitution, teachers 
and pupils, subjects, opportunities, and methods of in- 
struction. It is a school in the widest sense, and in this 
aspect of its nature alone, is suggestive of many inter- 
esting considerations. As in the government, so in the 
instruction of the family, the husband and father is the 
head. To him the wife (1 Cor. xiv. 35. 1 Tim. ii. 
11, 12) must look for needed religious information, and 
to him specially, the Scriptures address admonitions 
to the duty of instructing as well as governing the chil- 
dren. Still the wife is his associate as well as pupil. 
Thus both parents are teachers, and whatever be their 
character and that of their instructions, must be efficient. 
On the minds and hearts of their pupils, for the most 
part their children, they may make the earliest and 
most durable impressions. Their teaching may not be 
of a very high intellectual character ; and yet even in 
this respect, their moral qualifications, arising from the 
instincts of parental affection and their relation to the 
child, together with the opportunities they enjoy of giv- 
ing early and repeated lessons, confer on them great ad- 
vantages for a successful communication of knowledge, 
and a beneficial mental training, to the extent of their 
own abilities. And then by their example, daily admon- 
itions, and advice, they are capable of exciting their chil- 
dren to greater activity and eagerness for mental im- 
provement. There are many mental habits of great 
importance to the successful efforts of a student, in which 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



27 



parents, of even moderate intellectual attainment, are 
the most efficient trainers. As already intimated, we 
must also bear in mind, that the process of instruction 
begins at the earliest possible period. The mother's 
chamber is the best infant-school room. The parent has 
access to the mind and heart, before the faculties of the 
one have been injured by injudicious modes of culture, 
and the affections of the other have become set on that 
which is evil and alienated from that which is good. In 
early life, children are more susceptible of instruction in 
things than words. They are naturally inquisitive, credu- 
lous, and confiding. But they are volatile, and incapable 
of protracted mental effort of any kind, and especially, 
of processes of reasoning. Then is the period for im- 
parting the knowledge of important facts, and for making 
impressions of useful truths ; and for such a work, no 
one is so suitable as the parent, who can listen with un- 
wearied patience to the prattling questioner, with a tender 
regard for the child's best interests will aim to fill the 
opening mind with unmixed truth, and, by a variety in 
the matter and modes of teaching, will adapt it even 
to the fickle temper of childhood. It is especially in re- 
gard to moral training that this fireside teaching evinces 
its superiority to any other. The daily and almost 
hourly opportunities of the parent for inculcating love 
of truth, the practice of self-denial, and the exercise of 
forbearance, gentleness, and kindred virtues, and of cor- 
recting tendencies to evil, checking the ebullitions of 
temper, and curbing propensities to the indulgence of 
malice, envy, and similar vices, afford an advantage for 
such culture, no where else to be found, even could as 



28 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



suitable teachers as parents be procured. And just those 
methods of teaching which the companionship of chil- 
dren and parents dictates, are just such as the peculiar 
circumstances of the former demand. Moral principles 
and habits must be inculcated by continued and fre- 
quently repeated efforts, by little and little, rather than 
by set forms of admonition and protracted lectures. To 
the former it is obvious, that the age and employments 
of children peculiarly fit them, while they render the lat- 
ter as certainly unsuitable. 

The remarks already made supersede the necessity of 
any special suggestions touching the suitableness of this 
school for instruction in the manners and minor morals 
of life. The same considerations which have been of- 
fered as to the more important departments of instruc- 
tion, apply in respect of these. So also in whatever re- 
lates to the physical education, not only of those of very 
tender years, but also of those of riper age, the parents, 
as the natural guardians of their children, possess a pe- 
culiar suitableness for giving instruction and inculcating 
useful habits. 

But parents are not the only teachers of this home- 
school. * Children become teachers of children, and ser- 
vants and dependents may be, in turn, teachers and 
taught. Parents themselves are in a school, where ex- 
perience presides, to confirm the lessons which duty, in- 
structed out of God's word, imparts ; and whether for good 
or evil, there is ever going on, in ten thousand of fami- 
lies, processes of mental, moral, and physical training, 
which precede in time, and often in efficiency, those 
more artificial agencies, which are employed to mould the 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



29 



character and shape the destiny of man. Where the 
family constitution includes servants in the organization, 
we have a happy exemplification of its capabilities for 
that instruction, which is most essential to the welfare 
of all, and of which, by their circumstances in life, such 
persons stand most in need. We mean, of course, re- 
ligious teaching. Like children, servants are under 
authority. To a certain extent, of which we may have 
more to say hereafter, their religious training is in the 
hands of the master. Their necessities, in this respect, 
are by no means represented by their desires. On the 
contrary, the less they have, the less they desire of re- 
ligious influences. As belonging to the class of the 
ignorant and poor, they are dependent; and yet, left 
entirely to themselves, they would rarely seek know- 
ledge. But as parts of the family, they are, especially 
while young, in a position eminently adapted to secure 
for them the advantages of moral training. Many of 
the privileges which children enjoy, in respect of daily 
intercourse with those who teach, the influence of exam- 
ple, the reiteration of practical lessons on virtue and 
vice, and the useful restraints to which they are subjected, 
are, to a great extent, those of servants ; and it is doubt- 
ful whether any method could be devised, by which this 
class of persons, free or bond, would have extended to 
them better means for religious improvement, than those 
afforded by a well ordered family constitution. 

While, in our remarks, we have had in view the na- 
ture of this constitution as established by God, we are 
not unmindful of the fact, already intimated, in speaking 
of it as a government, that by reason of man's depravity, 



30 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



it is not by any means necessarily a school of righteous- 
ness, of useful learning, nor even of proper physical train- 
ing. Still, even if a school of opposite results, it is no 
less a school, and whether for good or evil, one of the 
most important agencies which God has employed for 
bringing blessings on man, or which man has perverted 
to bringing curses on himself. 

Sec. II. The design of the family constitution. 

A discussion of the designs of God in organizing the 
family constitution will serve to illustrate and confirm 
the views of its nature now presented, and will also 
bring to our notice, others which are necessarily involved 
in such a discussion. 

( 1.) A prominent part of this design was the multipli- 
cation of mankind. The injunction given to our first pa- 
rents before the fall, ( Gen. i. 27-8,) was repeated to Noah 
and his sons, after God had destroyed all the rest of the 
race for their wickedness. That the purpose of this in- 
junction or (if any prefer the word) permission, was or- 
dained to be effected by marriage, the fundamental element 
of the family constitution is clearly implied by the circum- 
stances under which it was originally given, and the em- 
phatic statement of Moses, that q£ all women, only the 
"wives of Noah and his sons," were saved in the ark. 
Physiologists, statists, and the soundest political econo- 
mists and moral philosophers confirm this view, by a con- 
curring testimony, that, other things being equal, mar- 
riage is the best means to effect the purpose of the di- 
vine injunction. 

( 2.) Intimately connected with this, another part of 
the divine design was to secure the preservation and 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



31 



bodily welfare of children. Let none suppose such a 
purpose beneath the attention of the all-wise Creator. 
Although man's immortal part far exceeds, in value, his 
mortal, yet while on earth the sound condition of the in- 
tellect and the affections is so intimately connected with 
that of the body, that the right development of the physi- 
cal constitution is materially subservient to the cultiva- 
tion of man's nobler faculties of soul. He, therefore, 
who does "all things well," and cares even for the 
sparrow, has provided for securing to the human race, as 
much bodily health and vigour, as is consistent with 
man's fallen estate. 

The infant of the human species, it has been often ob- 
served, is the feeblest of all animals at its birth, the least 
provided with instinct and the least capable of preserv- 
ing its own being. Hence it needs the tenderest atten- 
tion, the most assiduous care, and the most untiring per- 
severance on the part of others, to develop its physical 
faculties to a mature exercise. And long after the young 
of other animals are able to provide for their own wants, 
must children still be objects of watchful care for their 
health, their food, clothing, and comfortable lodging. 
Now God has designed, by the perpetual and exclusive 
union of their parents, exactly the most appropriate 
means to secure the care and attention to children, of 
which they thus stand in need. By neither alone, could 
the duties required be adequately performed. Although, 
the mother, in common with some other animals, is provi- 
ded in her own body, with the most suitable nourishment 
for the infant, and, in common with all, led by the in- 
stincts of nature to extend to her helpless offspring a 



32 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



tender and watchful care, in the performance of a thou- 
sand nameless, but essential acts of kindness, which no 
hireling could be induced, however capable, properly to 
discharge ; still unaided, she must ordinarily fail to meet 
the full demands of her position. The long and feeble 
state of infancy is itself a severe exaction on her strength, 
her time, and her health. The care of other children and 
a provision for their many and increasing wants would 
devolve on her yet heavier responsibilities, and exact se- 
verer toils; and thus must she either put in jeopardy the 
health and lives of her offspring, or sinking under her 
burdens, leave them, perhaps to a harder fate, in the 
hands of others. On the other hand, although the fa- 
ther might be more capable of sustaining the burden, 
which the support of older children imposes, he is, by the 
nature of those duties, in the performance of which he 
finds his capability, all the less fitted for the care of in- 
fancy and feeble childhood. Thus the deficiencies of 
one parent are supplied by the other, and in their com- 
bined services we see the wise and benevolent design of 
God toward children beautifully exemplified. 

Farther, let us briefly notice the influence on the phys- 
ical condition of the race, resulting from a relaxation, 
neglect, or violation of the scriptural law of marriage. 
In heathen and other lands, wherein all or either of 
these evils exist, we find that a physical degeneracy or 
loss of population, or both, have followed. A regard for 
common welfare and the evidently destructive tendency 
of licentiousness have given rise to laws, or customs with 
the force of laws, among all such nations, the operation 
of which has served partially to prevent or remedy the 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



S3 



sad consequences which must have otherwise ensued. 
Indeed we may find among some, that the " law writ- 
ten on the heart of man," has preserved a great measure 
of its authority. Still, where the light of the gospel has 
never shone, mankind only yield such obedience to the 
laws of conscience as suits their interests, and the cases 
of its palpable violation often become so numerous that 
a state of transgression is rather the rule, and that of 
obedience the exception. Polygamy, concubinage, easy 
divorce, and incest, with their consequences, infanticide, 
exposure and desertion of children, and neglect of their 
most necessary wants, clothe the domestic histories of 
such nations with some of the darkest features of man's 
degradation. And in nominally Christian nations, how 
often does the indulgence of vicious propensities impair 
or destroy parental instincts ! Sin and shame soon efface 
the lines of duty to children, written on the heart, by the 
finger of God, so that the mother forgets her tender off- 
spring, and the father denies and spurns from his sight 
his own blood. 

These remarks suggest another testimony to the adap- 
tation of the family constitution, for the continuance and 
preservation of our race. Many schemes of benevolence 
have been devised to provide for those children, who have 
been deserted by poor or vicious parents. In the lar- 
gest and best arranged establishments of this kind, we 
have reason to believe the best medical skill and the best 
nursing available are employed, and yet the proportion 
of deaths is far heavier than among the infants which 
enjoy family care. Homage is rendered to the family 
institution also, in the fact, that while, on economical 



34 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



grounds, the youngest infants are cared for in common, 
at the earliest possible period after infancy, the children 
are placed in suitable families, to enjoy the peculiar physi- 
cal as well as moral benefits which they offer. However 
much, then, we may admire that benevolence, which thus 
provides for those innocent sufferers by the sins or mis- 
fortunes of others, we are constrained to feel, that the 
teaching of the experiment sadly demonstrates man's 
incapacity to improve God's plans. Indeed it has ap- 
peared that the success of such institutions has tended 
to increase the crimes, the evils of which they were in 
part designed to prevent or alleviate. God has thus 
sanctioned the family constitution, by not allowing man's 
best intentioned and best devised schemes for ameliora- 
ting the evils which flow from despising it, to be unmixed 
blessings. 

Whether then we consider the adaptation of this consti- 
tution to the preservation of a healthy race, or the fail- 
ures in this respect which follow its neglect, we are 
equally confirmed in the position, that this is one of the 
important ends which God designed in its organization. 
To the same purport, did our limits permit, we might ad- 
duce a testimony from the long train of evils to man's 
physical condition, incurred by those, who perpetuate 
crimes against the marriage-law, evils which enfeeble the 
body and taint the blood, and are transmitted with vitia- 
ting power to posterity, involving also, in their train, the 
most deplorable influences on man's mental and moral 
condition. 

( 3.) Another design of the family constitution is the 
promotion of true piety. Its eminent adaptation to se- 



FAMILY "RELIGION. 



35 



cure such an end, is a fair inference from the considera- 
tions of its nature already offered. The authority of the 
parent and the subjection of children and servants, the 
early, frequent, and long continued series of opportuni- 
ties for giving and receiving instruction, the confidence 
of children in parents and the natural concern of parents 
for children, the oft recurring occasions for bringing the 
great truths of the gospel to bear on the affairs of prac- 
tical life, are some of the prominent and more obvious 
considerations, which induce the inference, that an or- 
ganization evincing such an adaptation for promoting 
religious knowledge and practice must have been thus 
designed by its Author. 

Again the truths of religion which men are most con- 
cerned to know and receive, are those which address the 
faith rather than the reason. All such truths must first 
be received on authority. They are revealed by God, 
and are therefore to be believed by us. But it is all 
important, that those whose faith in such truths is de- 
manded, should have confidence in those who present 
them as divine revelations. Now children instinctively 
give credence to what their parents tell them. When 
we remember how slow a progress the gospel makes 
among adults, who have had no religious training, and 
how the cares of this life and the deceitfulness of riches 
choke the growth of good seed, we can but admire the 
wisdom of that plan, by which provision is made for se- 
curing to truth an effectual lodgment in the mind, before 
the corrupting and alienating influences of the world have 
attained full sway. 

The duties of true piety are coincident with the duties 



36 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



which parents ought to press on the minds of their chil- 
dren, in view of their temporal welfare. While acting 
fully up to those requisitions, which the nature of the 
family constitution as a school sets forth, the parent is 
also training his charge for God's service. 

The privacy and quiet of the family, its seclusion from 
the noise and bustle of society, and its comparative ex- 
emption from the intrusion of occasions of temptation, 
together with the limited number of the pupils and their 
intimate relations and friendly intercourse, all mark the 
fireside as a most favourable spot for inculcating and re- 
ceiving those truths, which make wise to salvation. 

Finally, the teachings of the word of God are conclu- 
sive on this topic. We need not advocate, as has some- 
times been done, the proposition, that the family con- 
stitution is, in any proper sense, a church. The idea is 
not countenanced by Scripture. Even were we to inter- 
pret the apostle's phrase, " the church that is in their 
house," Rom. xvi. 5, to denote a family organized into 
a church, it would not follow, that every Christian 
household is a church. Nor is there any reason to sup- 
pose that such a title was used as to the family of Aquila, 
except to designate a Christian assembly, accustomed 
to convene at his house. Although not such a religious 
institution as the church, the family is a religious insti- 
tution, according to the Divine economy, which histori- 
cally precedes the church and enters, as a unit, into its 
composition. Conf. of Faith, xxv. 2. Form of Gov. ii. 4. 

For while there may not be found any passage, which 
states this proposition in express terms, we can clearly 
perceive that it is fully implied in many parts of both 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



3? 



the historical and preceptive portions of Scripture. In 
the recorded recognition of Abraham's piety in his 
family, God intimates, that the fulfilment of the great 
promises made to him, and to mankind through him, 
were suspended on the religious character of his family ; — 
" he will command his children and his household after 
him ; and they shall do justice and judgment, that the 
Lord may bring upon Abraham that which he has spoken 
of him." Gen. xviii. 19. Indeed while the promise to 
Abraham and his seed had a far wider scope of fulfil- 
ment, than was presented in the temporal and spiritual 
blessings of his natural descendants, it includes them and, 
more immediately, his near progeny. By his piety, his 
faith, and obedience, God was pleased to communicate 
blessings to Isaac and Jacob, and Jacob's family. It is 
also instructive to notice, that it was through one selected 
family of Jacob's natural descendants, that God pro- 
vided a ministry for his church ; and though the special 
enactments, providing that the priests should be the lin- 
eal descendants of Levi, contain much that is typical, the 
arrangement is suggestive of the idea, that along with 
accuracy in genealogy, there was also required a care- 
ful preparation of the youth, in the home of their fathers, 
for the sacred service to which they were destined. 

There are numerous promises of blessings, in which 
children are specially included with their parents. " The 
mercy of the Lord is from everlasting to everlasting 
upon them that fear him, and his righteousness unto 
children's children." Psa. ciii. IT. "The Lord shall in- 
crease you more and more, you and your children." Psa. 
cxv. 14. And so they are connected in threatenings. 



38 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



God declares he will visit " the iniquities of the fathers 
upon the children." Ex. xx. 5. Accordingly, parents 
are addressed as the representatives of their children in 
religious matters. The destinies of the descendants of 
Noah's sons were indicated in the terms of blessing and 
malediction addressed to their ancestors. Gen. ix. 24 — 
27. So also the predictions of Jacob, though addressed 
to his sons as they were gathered around him, Gen. xlix. 
1 — 26, were descriptive of the future fortunes of their 
descendants. 

Under both the Jewish and Christian dispensations, we 
find that one of the seals of the covenant of grace has a 
special reference to the religious relations of the child- 
ren. The circumcision of Jewish children and the bap- 
tism of those of Christian households, each contains an 
implication, that the parents, who thus ask for their 
children a Divine recognition as children of the covenant, 
engage to bring them up as such. And as the Jews 
were directed most assiduously to teach their children 
the great facts of their history and doctrines of their 
faith, Deut. xi. 19. Psa. lxxviii. 3 — 7. Prov. iv. 1 — 13; 
xxii, 6 ; so under the Christian dispensation, the reli- 
gious teaching of children is distinctly set forth as a 
parental duty. Eph. vi. 4. In both the Old and New 
Testaments, these precepts are sustained by examples of 
the conduct of pious men. Thus Joshua determined for 
himself and his "house," to serve the Lord. Josh, 
xxiv. 15. David, after his public duties had been ended, 
returned " to bless his household," 2 Sam. vi. 20, in 
imitation of the pious custom of his father, in whose house 
was a "yearly sacrifice for all the family." 1 Sam. xx. 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



89 



6. To these may be added the example of one of more an- 
cient date, the patriarch Job, who " sent and sanctified" 
his children, " and rose up early in the morning and offered 
burnt-offerings according to the number of them all ; thus 
did Job continually," or "all the days." Job i. 5. The 
pious Jewish parents who brought their children to Christ, 
to put his hands on them and bless them, only carried out 
a proper view of the religious duties involved in the pa- 
rental relation ; and the record of the young Timothy, 
instructed by his mother Eunice and his grandmother 
Lois' presents, doubtless, only one of many such exam- 
ples, which the history of that period might have afforded. 

Comprehended in the design to convey religious bles- 
sings by the family constitution, it might also be s'hown, 
was that of thus securing the best temporal benefits. 
Godliness is profitable for this life. The good Christian 
will be the good citizen, and while God has appointed 
the family constitution an eminently appropriate and use- 
ful means of bringing many sons and daughters to heav- 
enly glory, he has also ordained it as the wisest method 
of training citizens for the commonwealth. But as this 
design is comprehended in the other, we need offer 
no additional illustrations or confirmations of the po- 
sition. 

Sec. III. The importance of the family constitution. 

Without claiming for the family constitution a prece- 
dence of the church, as a more efficient institution for 
promoting man's spiritual welfare; or precedence of the 
state, as a more efficient institution for securing to man 
all the temporal blessings of good government ; the sketch 
now given of its nature and design must lead every re- 



40 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



fleeting mind to a high estimate of its importance in pro- 
viding a most essential aid to both of these great agen- 
cies for man's civilization. It is to the proper observance 
of the law of marriage that we owe purity of blood, and 
that certainty of relationship, which, both as a sentiment 
and a fact, exerts such wide spread influence on man's 
happiness and the healthful structure, peace, and order 
of society. The great poet of England's Commonwealth, 
in lofty verse, worthy of the theme, thus presents the 
fundamental relations of this law to the family constitu- 
tion and its blessings : 

" Hail wedded love, mysterious law, true source 
Of human offspring, sole propriety 
In paradise of all things common else ! 
By thee adulterous lust was driven from men 
Among the bestial herds to range ; by thee 
Founded in reason, loyal, just, and pure, 
Kelations dear, and all the charities 
Of father, son, and brother first were known I" 

Paradise Lost, iv. 750-757. 

Those kind and tender family affections which are as- 
sociated with the words, husband, wife, father, mother, 
son, daughter, brother, and sister, are the rich fruits of 
this divinely ordained social organization. In barbarous 
lands they are hardly known. They constitute the true 
ties, which give to the word Home its power. They in- 
vest it with the charms, which, irrespective of all physi- 
cal attractions, render it the object of early, constant 
love, and the source of our purest earthly joys. These 
"relations dear" bind together the elements of society. 
Families become knit to families. Associations of place 
and time, — memories of childhood and youth, with all 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



41 



the endearing attachments to old homesteads, which, 
with a sweet and holy power, bind men to the country 
of their birth, flow as refreshing streams from the family 
fountain. Hence, true patriotism, noble, inspiring sen- 
timents, deeds of heroic courage, and power to suffer and 
to labour in a country's cause, which have been the 
themes of history and of song, have taken rise. In the 
family, woman has been elevated and throned. In no 
heathen nation has she ever been assigned her true place. 
In Rome only, of all ancient or modern nations, not 
Christian, was she raised to any thing approaching her 
high office. But in Rome, she was rather either the mis- 
tress or the slave of licentiousness, than the priestess of 
virtue. For the virtues of one Cornelia, Roman history 
narrates the vices of a hundred Messalinas. With few 
exceptions, " home was a word dissevered from those high 
and holy associations," with which, by the family consti- 
tution of the word of God, it has been connected. Hence 
the true place of woman did not exist, for home is the 
empire over which she reigns, with love as the sceptre of 
her power. Had the family constitution given the world 
no other sentiments, than those which are associated with 
the words wife, mother, daughter, and sister," it would 
deserve our high admiration, as a source of power over 
human hearts. Not only does the state derive from this 
divinely established institution, a healthy, vigorous popula- 
tion, the true capital of a nation, but by means of its 
bonds the rights of property are defined and secured, 
and its transmission regulated. Erase the family from 
the structure of society, and our laws of property would 
lose almost all their force as well as propriety. The 
4* 



42 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



estates of intestates would be the prey of rapacity, and 
the establishment of wills be next to an impracticability. 
Incestuous connections would engender a feeble race of 
men, who would expend their only strength in feuds and 
broils. Might would make right, or anarchy and vio- 
lence sap the foundations and overthrow the structure 
of society. 

The increase of national is the aggregate of the in- 
crease of individual wealth. But individual energy and 
enterprise find few such incentives as are supplied by a 
desire to enhance the prosperity and happiness of wife 
and children. While, on the one hand, the ties of affec- 
tion and love of home tend to repress aimless roving, 
and exercise a conservative power in securing the sta- 
bility of the state ; on the other, the desire to build up 
the fortunes of a family opens up the forests of unculti- 
vated lands, explores the distant hidden mines of wealth, 
causes the wilderness to blossom and bring forth fruit, 
builds marts of trade, and widens the boundaries of 
civilization. In a word, to this wise device of the all- 
wise God, we owe the continued existence, the increasing 
growth, the energy, and the enterprise of the race. Marred 
as it has been by sin, it is still an element of the purity 
and prosperity of the church, and of the progress and 
power of the state. 



FAMILY RELIGION. 

V 



43 



CHAPTER II. 

THE RESPONSIBILITIES AND DUTIES BELONGING TO THE 
FAMILY CONSTITUTION. 

Sect. 1. The responsibilities and duties common to all 
the members of the family. 

The nature and design of the family constitution neces- 
sarily impose great responsibilities on the members of the 
household. As God has founded the family, he has also in- 
structed us in his word, how we must act in the several rel- 
ations of husband, wife, parents, children, brothers, 
sisters, masters, and servants, so as to secure, for ourselves 
and others, the benefits of this important institution, and 
avoid converting any of the elements of its organization 
into the means of injuring our own welfare or that of 
society. 

On the husband and wife, or parents, in whose union, 
the family constitution takes its rise, and especially on the 
husband or father, there rests the heaviest responsibility, 
for its character and influence. He stands in immediate 
relation to every other member of the family. All are sub- 
ject to his authority and dependent on hTm, and, of course, 
will be materially influenced, in character and conduct, 
by his principles and course of life. But even the young- 
est or most ignorant accountable member of the family 



44 FAMILY RELIGION. 

occupies a position, by which he may contribute to pro- 
mote or hinder the full efficiency of an institution, whose 
power is to be found, rather in the harmonious coop- 
eration of all its parts, than in the special excellence of 
any one of them. 

Before discussing the relative duties of the members 
of the family, we may properly urge on the consideration 
of all, a few general remarks : 

(1.) For the right appreciation of our responsibilities, 
in every relation of life, and a faithful discharge of the 
duties we owe to others, we need the renewing and sanc- 
tifying work of God's Spirit. A new heart and humble 
faith in Christ are essential to a sincere reverence for 
the authority of God's word, in which our duties are in- 
culcated. In even the best Christians, the remains of 
indwelling sin occasion great imperfection. Much more 
then, may we expect those to come short, who rely only 
on the guidance of instinct, the inducements of interest, 
or the imperfect code of human morality. We admit, in- 
deed, that under the genial, general influences of the 
gospel, there are men, who very commendably perform 
many duties, both of public and private life ; still it is 
only to those, who regard the teachings of God's law 
which prescribes man's duty to those " of his own house," 
authoritatively and perfectly, that we can confidently look 
for the full exemplification of that conduct which the con- 
stitution of the family demands. 

(2.) The necessary intimacy of the family circle often 
occasions some clashing of personal interests or presumed 
happiness. As this intimacy is one of the chief charms 
of domestic life, it should not be sacrificed, to avoid these 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



45 



incidental evils. On the contrary, let these occasions 
for subordinating selfish views to the good of others, be 
made the means for exercising self-denial, forbearance, 
meekness, gentleness, generosity, and kindred virtues. 
Thus each member will be more strongly bound to the 
others, and all learn that the happiness of each is the 
happiness of all. Nearly related to this suggestion is 
another. In the family constitution we have an excellent 
exemplification of what, in political economy, is called a 
division of labour. No human wisdom could better ar- 
range an institution in this respect. That this arrange- 
ment may be most productive of prosperity, and of peace 
and order, each one in the household should studiously 
avoid interfering with the province of employment al- 
lotted to the other. Otherwise there will be confusion, 
blunders, imperfections, and constant failures. The 
meddling of a husband in the affairs of domestic economy 
belonging to the wife, or the interference of the wife with 
the out-door labours of the husband, tends to derange the 
entire constitution of the family, to occasion contention, 
and hinder success in both departments. 

( 3.) Let those who are not pious avoid hindering the 
piety of others. The relation of every immortal being 
to God rises far superior to all earthly relations, and the 
rights of conscience are of the most sacred character. 
The husband, father, or master, who steps in between 
God and the wife, child, or servant, to prevent either 
from his worship and service, is guilty of a daring act 
of rebellion against God, as well as of a petty tyranny 
over one of his household. So if the wife, by any of 
the means of influence over the husband or other mein- 



46 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



bers of the family, which she can exert, designedly holds 
such one back from access to God, she is incurring the 
Divine displeasure as well as the risk of ruining a soul. 
No authority with which any member of the family is 
invested, nor any legitimate relation existing in it, justi- 
fies such interferences. And here it may be remarked, 
that in those frequently recurring cases in our country, 
when different church connections are preferred by the 
members of a family, the utmost liberty of action should 
be allowed. This is consistent, as well with a proper 
zeal for each one's own preference, as it is with a cordial 
affection to those who differ. All those moral means 
proper to be used to affect the views of others, as instruc- 
tion, suitable persuasion and the like, are proper ; but 
the use of authority on the part of those possessing it, 
or of angry recriminations or revilings or ridicule, on the 
part of others, disturbs the love and order which should 
reign supreme in the household. In all this, of course, 
we are not understood as teaching that children or ser- 
vants, who of whatever age are yet in their minority 
by ignorance, are to be left uncontrolled, as to the kind 
of religious worship they ought to attend. Our remarks 
relate rather to those adult members of a family, who 
are presumed to be capable of making their own choice 
as to religious matters. Meanwhile it is our conviction, 
that, ordinarily, in rightly trained families there will arise 
but slight practical difficulty in this whole matter. 

Sec. II. Responsibilities and duties of husbands and 
wives. 

1. In the family constitution, as already shown, the 
husband is "the head of the wife," Eph. v. 23, as 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



47 



well as of the family; but not thereby necessarily a 
tyrant. For the authority with which he is invested, is 
to be exercised in love. " Husbands, love your wives, even 
as Christ loved the church and gave himself for it." Eph. 
v. 25-27. As Christ employs his authority over the church 
for cleansing and sanctifying it, so must the husband use 
his over his wife for her benefit, and that of their com- 
mon family. This scriptural view of the sense in which 
he is the head, while recognizing him as ordinarily supe- 
rior in capacity, for directing in the affairs of business, 
and especially in whatever pertains to the out-door life, 
forbids him to use his power, merely to promote his per- 
sonal ease or minister to his caprices, at the expense of 
his wife's comfort. This general statement of the scrip- 
tural law is the basis of several specific suggestions. 

(1.) The husband should be considerate of his wife's 
health and bodily comfort. He should aim to lighten 
her domestic burdens. He has command of the common 
resources, and should not grudge expense of time or 
money, to afford her recreation and all needed help. 
Let him remember, that, though home is her sphere and 
her empire, it is not her prison, though she " worketh 
willingly with her hands," and " eateth not the bread 
of idleness," Prov. xxxi. 13, 27, yet she needs rest. 
Let him give her his company, aid in her mental im- 
provement, and endeavour, by his pleasant and cheerful 
conversation, to make amends to her for the long hours 
of her loneliness, when he is absent on his business, or 
the yet more tedious hours of occupation, amid the tortu- 
ring and perplexing annoyances of little domestic duties 
and cares. Let him share with her that night watching 



48 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



over sick children, which opens so many early graves for 
mothers. Above all, let him be careful to use his authority 
fully to sustain hers, over children and servants. Though 
his inferior she is their superior. 

(2.) The apostle, to the injunction, " Love your wives," 
adds in another place, " and be not bitter against 
them." Col. iii. 19. In this there is displayed a con- 
summate knowledge of human nature. Men who are 
wearied and perplexed with business, disappointed by 
the unfaithfulness of agents, distressed by the treachery 
of supposed friends, or injured by the arts of enemies, 
often bring darkened brows and anxious hearts to their 
homes. In no humour to bear patiently any petty annoy- 
ance there, they too often yield to the temptation to 
vent the spleen of their sensitive spirits, in fretting and 
" bitter" words. We admit all which can be said in 
palliation of such conduct. But the wife is the last per- 
son to whom such words should be addressed. In her 
kind sympathies and soothing attentions, the irritated 
husband ought to find means of comfort. Let him not 
destroy this resource. Rather let him curb his spirit, 
and seek, by confiding to her his sorrows, to open the 
fountains of her tenderness. He will not seek, in 
vain, from a true woman. Or, it may be, that though all 
has gone well from home, there await his return some 
of those petty vexations, such as late meals, badly pre- 
pared food, cold rooms, or noisy children, for which his 
wife may be responsible to some extent. Still, let him 
consider how many palliations of all this may exist, and 
avoid the " bitter" word. And even should she so forget 
her place and interest as to open the bitter fountains of 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



49 



ill-nature, — let him, with manly magnanimity, forbear to 
aid in the unamiable employment. 

2. On the other hand, the scriptural injunction, " Wives, 
submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the 
Lord," Eph. v. 22; or, as it is elsewhere expressed, "as 
it is fit in the Lord," (Col. iii. 18,) presents the funda- 
mental principle of the duty of wives. One passage inter- 
prets the other. Paul does not mean, in the first, that the 
obedience to the husband is to " be as devout and uncondi- 
tional as that which she is bound to render to the Lord, but 
it is to be regarded as part of her obedience to the Lord."* 
In other words, it is the obedience of a Christian, " deter- 
mined by religious motives." And as the husband's 
authority is to be exercised in love, so the wife's obe- 
dience is to be limited by Christian principle. Hence, 

(1.) Although in the context (Eph. v. 24) this subjection 
is required in " every thing," it is implied, that nothing 
is required contrary to the Divine command. Neither as 
to those acts of personal conduct, nor as to the exercise 
of her subordinate authority in the family, may she obey 
any such requisition. And yet even in this refusal, there 
should be the manifestation of a Christian temper, or 
what might be termed a Christian disobedience. Every 
effort should be used to avoid a direct conflict, a positive, 
decided breach. Gentle and kind remonstrance, studious 
efforts to please in all else, a mild and courteous refusal, 
should characterize the wife's demeanour. If her hus- 
band be a Christian, misled and self-deceived for a time, 
•he will thus perhaps be led back to duty ; if not, he may 
thus be " won by the conversation of the wife. ( 1 Pet. iii. 1.) 
* Dr. Hodge on Ephesiaus, v. 22. 

5 



50 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



Let her, by all means, temper her conduct with Chris- 
tian grace, and avoid whatever is exasperating and in- 
sulting. 

(2.) This obedience, in other matters, should be im- 
plicit, prompt, and cheerful. There may be occasions 
when it is required in things indifferent, as it respects 
Christian duty, and yet perhaps very trying to the tem- 
per of the wife. Thus, the husband may interfere in her 
appropriate sphere, in the household economy, or in her 
modes of dress, or some other similar matter. Let her 
by a kind, gentle manner endeavour to dissuade him 
from his position or modify his views, but, if unsuccess- 
ful, she had better submit. If evil ensues, the discovery 
that he is alone to be blamed, will do more to convince 
him of the error of such a course another time, than her 
persistent and obstinate resistance. This might, by 
arousing his pride, induce him to persevere in his wrong 
doing, at the cost of valuable interests to both. 

(3.) We have said this obedience should be "prompt, 
implicit, and cheerful." This is the spirit of the injunc- 
tion, "Let the wife see that she reverence her husband." 
Eph. v. 33. The feeling of reverence is composed of 
fear and love, recognizes the superiority of its object, 
and unites trust with obedience. The wife who reveres 
her husband, desires to please, by the performance of all 
duties, whether prescribed or not. Hers is not a mere 
submission which may be petulant, sullen, and even in- 
sulting, as that of a refractory slave ; but a submission 
in disposition as well as conduct, to the spirit as well as- 
the letter of command. She will endeavour to anticipate 
her husband's wishes, and not by mere personal caresses, 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



51 



or a lavish care for his dress or the gratification of his 
appetite, but by endeavours to promote his domestic peace 
and comfort, and relieve him of perplexing and annoying 
cares, subordinating her wishes and plans to his, will 
seek to make his home the centre of his affections and 
the life-spring of his happiness. 

(4.) Contrary to these scriptural views of the duty of 
a wife, is that theory of an equality of the wife with the 
husband in every branch of domestic authority, for which 
so many " strong-minded" women and weak-minded men, 
in our day, contend. Did the theory lead to nothing 
more than its terms propose, a most deplorable amount 
of family feud and dissension must inevitably result. 
But as there cannot be a "united head," in any govern- 
ment, consistent with good order and peace, the practi- 
cal result of this perversion of the Bible doctrine, must be 
the utter subversion of the husband's authority. There 
may often be found women of a pert, conceited temper, 
who fancy that they know best what is for their husband's 
interest in his business, and understand better than he the 
whole routine of domestic management. They accord- 
ingly "usurp authority over the man," (1 Tim. ii. 12,) 
and essay to direct his servants, thwart his schemes, 
and order him as if only a steward, in the purchase and 
sale of property, the cultivation of his grounds, the 
education of children, and the expenditure of money. 
There are occasional instances, in which the wife is really 
more sensible and capable than her husband ; but one 
who is really such, will show her good sense and ability, 
by quietly leading her husband to her wishes, seeming to 
serve while she rules, and sustaining his authority though 



52 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



really directing its exercise. She will look well to the 
ways of her household, and manage its affairs in the 
manner which he should have adopted, had his abilities 
made him adequate to his duties. There is much jocular 
and loose talking, in all communities, as to the subordi- 
nation of one or the other partner in the family, which 
had as well be let alone as " not convenient." But 
many serious and biting truths are spoken in jest, and 
we fear that the advocacy of this subversion of scripture 
order, is often an illustration. As such a subversion 
has its origin in the depraved and diabolical principles 
of pride, vanity, and self-conceit, so it will, sooner or la- 
ter, produce the appropriate fruits of disorder, misrule, 
and insubordination. For even when it is best that the 
wife should lead, if her conduct is not that discreet 
course described above, it will have the effect of mistrain- 
ing her daughters to attempt following her example, in 
cases neither calling for such action nor permitting the 
attempt, except 'at the risk of a disruption of all family 
peace and order. 

In this connection, we feel bound to protest against all 
those specious proposals for reforming the marriage con- 
stitution, by giving to the wife the same rights of pro- 
perty and civil position which now pertain only to man. 
There may be evils incidental to the present arrangement, 
by reason of man's sin ; but the proposed remedy for 
these evils would only entail greater. It is but a step 
towards divorce, or other, and even more pernicious, in- 
fringements of the provisions of the marriage law. We feel 
confident of its ultimate failure. But that failure may be 
produced, only after, and by means of the disastrous 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



53 



consequences it must produce on society wherever its in- 
sidious poison takes effect. Let our people, fore-warned, 
be fore-armed, against all who undertake to be wiser 
than God, and boldly attack the works of his hands. 

3. While we thus see that marriage does not destroy 
the personal identity of the parties, and by imposing on 
each special responsibilities, requires duties peculiar to 
each, at the same time, the intimacy of the relation gives 
rise to a class of mutual duties. 

(1.) We know a clergyman who has been accustomed 
to substitute in the usual exhortation, closing a marriage 
ceremony, a short sentence, of this purport, " Be ever 
to each other what you now are, respectful, affection- 
ate, kind, forbearing, faithful, tender, and true." In this 
excellent summary, we have but another form of the wise 
admonition, that a married pair should continue to evince 
to each other the qualities, and pursue the conduct, by 
which the admiration of one and the favour of the other 
were secured before marriage. Let there be mutual re- 
spect for the person, opinions, tastes, judgment, and right 
habits of each. They bear the same name, have the 
same social position, are one in the eye of the law, and, 
ordinarily, enjoy a community of goods. The character 
and reputation of each is that of the other. The hus- 
band must see in his wife, "his own body," (Eph. v. 28,) 
and the wife, in the husband, "the head" to which she 
belongs as a body, as the church does to Christ. Let 
each then exercise to the other' the sentiments with which 
self should be regarded. 

(2.) In accordance with these general aspects of mutual 
duty, each should repose in the other entire confidence. 



54 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



The wife should have no secrets unshared with the hus- 
band. Let her avoid forming intimate friendships un- 
known to him. Let no foolish woman, married or single, 
or as foolish, and often more wicked, man, estrange her 
from him even in thought. He is her nearest friend. 
Even should he prove unworthy of her confidence, she 
had better weep over sorrow in secret and seek no earthly 
counsellor, than incur the risk of raising a barrier be- 
tween herself and her husband, and pave the way for fa- 
tally impairing family unity and peace. 

It is said of the good wife in Solomon's inimitable 
picture, " The heart of her husband doth safely trust in 
her," (Prov. xxxi. ll,)'and even should a wife not pre- 
sent a full example of her there described, yet let not 
her husband withdraw his confidence. United with the 
imperfections which pertain to our common nature, there 
will generally be found in women, properly educated and 
honourably trusted by their husbands, a fair average of 
discretion, industry, prudence, enterprise, and energy. 
Women may be inferior to men in the reasoning faculty, 
and deficient in knowledge of those business relations, 
which properly pertain to the province of men, in the ar- 
rangements of domestic economy ; but they are endued 
with remarkable powers of intuition : and with faculties 
for discerning what is right or wrong, proper or impro- 
per, sharpened by a sincere regard for the welfare of her 
family, a wife of an ordinary sound mind is her hus- 
band's best counsellor. On matters of business, out of 
her sphere, she may, from ignorance, be incompetent to 
give advice on the ways and means best suited to 
secure success ; but even in such cases her judgment on 



FAMILY KELIGION. 55 

plans, the operation of which may be explained to her, 
will be worthy of consideration. On all those questions, 
however, which present alternatives of good or evil re- 
sults, let the husband consult his wife, and this the more 
particularly, when the interests of her children are in- 
volved. Could some law be devised, by which no man's 
signature as security could be valid, without his wife's 
assent, we should hear less frequently of families reduced 
to poverty, to pay the debts of some reckless or fraudulent 
speculator, or the property of the honest and industrious 
but unwary citizen sacrificed, to meet the liabilities of 
some wily, artful intriguer who manages to evade the 
claims of justice and revel in luxury, while his victim is 
left to struggle through life harassed by debt and pinched 
by want. 

(3.) Let each carefully avoid addressing the other 
in the terms of severe rebuke or reproach. By reason 
of many imperfections and infirmities, " it is impossible, 
but that offences will come." Luke xvii. 1. The spirit 
of the Lord's precept as to the treatment of an offending 
brother, is eminently applicable in the similar intercourse 
of husband and wife. "If thy brother trespass against 
thee, go and tell him his fault between thee and him alone." 
Matt, xviii. 15. Let this be done in meekness and tender- 
ness, with long suffering and patience, and in the exercise 
of a forgiving spirit. Gal. vi. 1 ; Lev. xvii. 3. On the 
other hand, let each be ready to confess a fault when it 
shall have been brought to mind. " Confess your faults 
one to another," and, it ^ is well added, as intimating the 
duty of the offended party, "pray one for another." 
James v. 16. 



56 



FAMILY EELIGION. 



Most studiously should each avoid indulging a fault- 
finding spirit, in the presence of others, especially of 
children and servants. That man would be thought truly 
unwise, who would weaken the influence and authority 
of a steward, on whose discreet management of his estate, 
his prosperity depended. The wife is the steward of the 
husband. Let her not be lowered in the eyes of those, 
over whom her authority must be sustained for the com- 
mon benefit. On the other hand, let the wife avoid the 
indulgence of petulance towards her husband. It is con- 
trary to the injunction "to reverence" him, and if borne 
quietly, will degrade him in her eyes, — or if resented, 
will open wider breaches in confidence and affection. 
In both cases, the results of this evil are of the most de- 
plorable character. The offenders themselves may, for 
a time, feel a questionable satisfaction in the sense of a 
kind of superiority; but the husband has acted cowardly in 
dishonouring the "weaker vessel," and the wife rebel- 
liously, in insulting her "lord," (1 Pet. iii. 6,) and both 
have injured themselves. Eph. v. 23-27. Thus too they 
build up a household of ill-natured and misgoverned chil- 
dren and servants, whose indolence and idleness, unre- 
strained tempers and disorderly conduct, will destroy the 
peace, and waste the property of the family. 

( 4.) Let the husband and wife strive to lay the foun- 
dations of a "happy home" for children, by making 
home happy to each other. Home is the wife's empire. 
It is a dominion in which the gentlest, sweetest affections 
bear rule. Let her be a "keeper at home," as well as 
discreet and chaste (Tit. ii. 5) in her home. Thus as 
a "strong man armed," she will "keep her house," and 



FAMILY KELIGION. 



57 



the precious goods deposited in it will be safe. So let 
the husband by his presence, whenever possible, evince 
his appreciation of her society, and thus cheer her heart, 
and sustain and encourage her in her efforts to minister 
to his comfort. The husband who finds his chief happi- 
ness in the society of the street, the bar-room, or the 
club, — and the wife, who is a tattler and busy-body, 
"idle and wandering about from house to house," (1 Tim. 
v. 13,) will soon have no home worthy of the name or 
suggestive of the sweet associations connected with the 
term. 

( 5.) Above all, and as supplying a foundation for the 
richest enjoyment of this union, so rich in blessings, let 
the husband and wife strive to promote each other's 
spiritual welfare. If neither is pious, let them as "one 
flesh," with a common earnestness, zeal, and prayer, seek - 
a knowledge of the truth, renewed natures, the forgiveness 
of sins, engrafting into Christ, the application of his right- 
eousness, and the hope of everlasting life. If one be pi- 
ous and the other not, with what earnestness and untir- 
ing effort should the " believing" partner seek the true 
sanctification of the unbelieving ! Let such then watch 
every word and action, by which an influence on the 
spiritual welfare of the other, whether for good or evil, 
may be exerted. The interests of children, servants, 
neighbours, and posterity may be affected. If the house 
remain divided, its religious power may fall. Especially 
should the believing husband strive for the salvation of 
the unbelieving wife. Women have generally manifes- 
ted stronger Christian tendencies and susceptibilities 
than men. The graces of Christian character grow up 



58 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



more readily in a nature, which, though equally depraved, 
is not so prolific of hardening sins as that of man. The 
woman, too, is more secluded from temptation, and enjoys 
better opportunities for cultivating religious tempers. 
But, perhaps, for these very reasons, it has been observed, 
that the woman, who utterly refuses all religious influen- 
ces, and yields herself to the unrestrained indulgence of 
vicious principles* or corrupt habits, becomes, not only 
more incorrigible, but more mischievous than man. Wo- 
man presides over all those little streams of influence 
which affect the manners and minor morals of society. 
A look, a gesture, a smile, or a sneer from her, may 
often effect more evil than man's best efforts can easily 
undo. Thus the husband, whose children are the daily 
associates of a mother,' unaffected by the obligations of 
Christian truth, has an incentive to the most diligent en- 
deavours for her conversion, over and above the affection 
with which she is regarded. 

With some modifications as to the motives, the believ- 
ing wife should, with equal zeal, strive for her husband's 
salvation. She may do more for the spiritual welfare 
of her children and younger servants, unaided by him, 
than he can, unaided by her ; yet, his aid is all important 
to the full influence of religion in the family. It should 
be her constant effort, by a consistent christian example, 
to win her husband to Christ. She need not " usurp 
authority" over him, as his teacher, or affect a superiority 
even in the moral relations of the family ; but let her 
rather, by the society into which she leads him, the care- 
ful and prompt performance of her duties, and, especially, 
a studious regard for his comfort and happiness in his 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



59 



home, show him that her religion is worthy of imitation. 

On the other hand, let the unbelieving partner not only 

avoid all opposition to the other, in respect of religious 

privileges, on the grounds already adduced, but even 

on those of self-interest. The cost of the religious 

privileges of a wife is more than repaid in the temporal 

benefit which they fit her to confer. Those husbands, 

who interpose obstacles to the gratification of a wife's 

reasonable wishes, in such matters, are injuring their 

own best interests ; and wives, who endeavour to dissuade 

husbands from a proper attendance on religious duties, 

abstain from aiding them in sustaining family worship, 

or attending to the religious welfare of children and ser- 
es o 

vants, should remember how much more costly are the 
pleasures of gaiety and dissipation than those of religion, 
and how soon the temporal welfare of the household will 
be destroyed, if the salutary restraints and incentives of 
religious principle and motive be withdrawn. Indeed, 
the wife, especially, should bear in mind, that she owes her 
position of influence, even to oppose religion, to the benign 
power of the gospel. Only where its light and saving 
truths are known, has woman been raised to the dignity 
in which God created her ; and only by the prevalence 
of true piety among men, can she sustain any higher re- 
lation in the family, than that of a favourite servant, and 
a ministress to the pleasures of a capricious and licen- 
tious tyrant. 

Lastly, should both be pious, then, indeed, are the 
duties of promoting each other's spiritual improvement 
converted into delightful privileges. They are " helpers 
of each other's joy." There then arises an advantage 



60 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



such as that of having within us two souls. If one be 
in darkness and doubt, the other may come to aid, with 
the sweet promises of the gospel. If one be disposed to 
wander, the other can come, to call back the wanderer. 
If one fall, the other is at hand to raise up and restore. 
If one need light in ignorance, the other can come with 
the blessed truths of Scripture. In short, it might al- 
most be allowed us to regard marriage, as one of the means 
of grace, when the union is that of a son and daughter 
of the Lord Almighty. Though constitutionally the 
husband is the head of the wife, yet before God, they are 
equal. He ought to be able to teach her, to be her 
guide and comforter. Yet if the order in this matter 
be reversed, no evil consequences need be appre- 
hended. Let then the husband and wife joyfully, hope- 
fully, and constantly strive together for the " grace of 
life," that thus they may be fitted for their duties as pa- 
rents, improve to the highest degree the advantages 
provided in the family constitution, and be fully meet for 
a higher, holier and eternal union among the ransomed 
of heaven. 

When persons who have sustained the marriage relation, 
and been widowed, enter into that relation again, besides 
the duties which have already been suggested, others of 
a peculiar character arise. Without entering very fully 
into the subject, it may be enough to offer a few general 
remarks : 

1. It is no infringement of the rights of a living hus- 
band or wife, to cherish a tender regard for the memory 
of the dead. Sometimes there arises a petty jealousy of 
the contents of the grave. The portraits of the once loved 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



61 



dead are removed, and every allusion to them regarded 
as indelicate. This should not be. On the other hand, 
all invidious comparisons of the dead and living, should 
be avoided. Let the new marriage relation be formed 
with proper motives, and while retaining an affectionate 
recollection of the dead, husbands and wives may culti- 
vate the tenderest regard for the living. 

2. When mixed families of children are thus consti- 
tuted, there will be a demand for the more diligent ex- 
ercise of those graces of forbearance, forgiveness, and long 
suffering to which we have alluded. No principle 
can be stated, which will, perhaps, better meet all the 
requisitions of duty which may arise than this : that hus- 
bands and wives should endeavour to treat step- children 
as their own, neither on the one hand utterly neglecting 
them, through fear of producing conjugal alienation, nor 
on the other, lavishing on them the love due to their 
own neglected offspring. The position of a step-father 
or mother is one which demands great circumspection 
and prudence, but at the same time, one, which, rightly 
filled, may be made a source of invaluable blessing to all 
concerned. 

Sec. III. Responsibilities and duties of parents. 

1. To parents, next in importance to the formation of 
the marriage relation, is the birth of a child. Thus is 
presented a common object for their care, love, and sym- 
pathy. Few parents, even of the reckless and dissipated 
among men, or the gay and frivolous among women, 
fail to be favourably affected by such an event. To the 
little feeble, wailing babe, "from travail unto travail 
born," has often been assigned, in the providence of 



62 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



God, an influence for the benefit of parents, which the 
admonitions and entreaties of friends, and the most obvi- 
ous considerations of self interest, had failed to secure. 
From the birth day of the first born, many a husband 
has become a soberer and a wiser man, and many a wife 
a more prudent and discreet woman. 

To all reflecting parents, this event presents many 
new and interesting topics for serious consideration. 
Their position in life becomes invested with a new dignity. 
They are no longer to live unto themselves. The in- 
stincts of parental affection call for assiduous care and 
attention, in providing for the physical welfare of the 
helpless object of their common love. Its unfolding in- 
telligence suggests to them, that it possesses a spiritual 
nature, on whose proper development its success and 
happiness in life will depend. They will also be reminded, 
that the future history of their child, as read in that of 
other human beings, will be entwined in the destiny of 
others. It is ordained to influence as well as be influ- 
enced by them. On the family of which it has become 
a member, on kindred, friends, and society at large, and, 
perhaps, from some position of eminence in the state or 
the church, even on the nation and the human race, 
their child may be appointed to exercise a moral power 
for good or evil, which may be felt in widening circles 
of .benefit or injury through time, and even extend into 
eternity. Paul and Judas, Calvin and Charles V., Luther 
and Henry VIII., Knox and Queen Mary, Washing- 
ton and Napoleon, were once just such " infants of 
days." 

Above all, are parents called to consider, that they 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



63 



have introduced into being an immortal soul. Their 
child has begun an existence which will never end. The 
earth is to be burned up, the heavens to pass away, the 
elements to melt ; " the sun shall be darkened, the moon 
shall not give her light, and the stars of heaven shall 
fall;" but this feeble little body contains a soul, which 
shall still live and will ever live growing in intelligence, 
purity, and holiness, or sinking in pollution and misery, 
amidst the darkness of eternal despair ! 

In connection with these and other such considerations, 
parents are admonished, that to them, by the ordinance 
of God, in the constitution of the family, has been as- 
signed a most important part of the work, by which this 
intelligent and immortal creature is to be trained ; and 
that with their faithful or unfaithful execution of this 
solemn trust, will, in a most important degree, be con- 
nected the happiness or misery of their chjld, and the 
good or evil, of which its existence in the world may be 
the cause. 

The heavy responsibility which thus devolves on pa- 
rents, and which few properly realize, is enhanced by 
some further considerations. 

( 1.) Whatever be the nature and extent of those du- 
ties to children, to which the parental relation gives rise, 
parents are, ordinarily, least qualified for performing 
them, at that period of the family history, when this fit- 
ness is most needed. The training and character of the 
first born child will materially affect those of the other 
children. The novelty of the pleasure which a lively, 
healthy infant brings to a house, as it begins to develop 
its physical and mental faculties, often proves a serious 



64 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



hindrance to a right appreciation of the duties which its 
presence demands, and the blinded love for their tender 
offspring, which all parents feel, may more easily mislead 
those sustaining the relation, for the first time, to form 
inadequate or erroneous views of those duties. 

(2.) Such is the nature of the family constitution, 
that parents cannot properly delegate to others the re- 
sponsibilities which their relation incurs. Whatever aid, 
in the performance of their duties, they may be able to 
secure, they remain solely responsible ; and it is by no 
means a matter uf small moment, in rightly apprehend- 
ing their position, that they may greatly increase the 
difficulties of properly performing their duties, by the 
very aids which they select. 

(3.) To parents belongs the office of making the first 
and hence, ordinarily, the most durable, and, often, the 
most important impressions on the child's character. The 
work of teachers begins later. Often, when the most skil- 
ful and successful, they fail to eradicate the plants of evil 
growth which have been fostered by imprudent, or per- 
mitted to grow by negligent parents. 

(4.) The labour to be performed by parents is not 
that of a few days or months, but of years. The result 
is not to be accomplished by one special vigorous effort ; 
but it is the consequence of many little acts. It is not 
by a few violent, though well directed, blows of the mal- 
let which blocks off heavy fragments of the rude marble, 
that the sculptor succeeds in his art, nor by a few broad 
strokes of the brush, that the painter spreads on the can- 
vass, the conceptions of his genius ; but it is by the count- 
less delicate touches of the chisel or the pencil-brush, no 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



65 



one, perhaps, producing any perceptible effect, yet each 
important, as an element for securing the designed re- 
sult, that the one succeeds in presenting us the accurate, 
almost speaking model of the human figure, and the other 
transfers to the once naked cloth, the forms of animate 
and inanimate nature. So the parent, not by a few 
special acts or influences, but by the almost unconscious 
exercise of moral power, in word and gesture, in frown 
and smile, in tones and manner, as with daily touches 
of the moral chisel and brush, illustrating the " mighty 
power of littles," shapes the living soul for a place among 
the monuments of an ever glorious temple, or the scathed 
and blackened ruins of a lost world. 

Nor must we forget, that this work is to be performed, 
amidst all the perplexities and trials of daily life, the 
interruptions and engagements of society and business, 
at home and abroad, and by the way-side. Such a la- 
bour makes no ordinary demand on the faculties and 
energies of the mind, and they continually call for that 
preparation of heart, which divine teaching and aid can 
alone afford. 

Indeed, in view of what has been said, every reflecting 
parent must be constrained to exclaim, " Who is sufficient 
for these things ?" An amiable and intelligent young 
mother was once visited by her pastor, on her request to 
see him, for the purpose of a conversation on personal 
religion. He did not find her, however, evincing any 
special concern of the usual character, such as distress 
for sin, apprehension of God's wrath and a desire for his 
favour. On the contrary, she candidly acknowledged 
that she was not affected by views of that sort. But she 



66 



FAMILY KELIGION. 



said she desired to be a Christian, that she might thereby 
be fitted for the right performance of her duties to her 
children. The burden of the parent's prayer in relation 
to the unconscious* babe, from its earliest existence, 
should be in the spirit of Manoah's prayer when he de- 
sired that the man of God (the angel) might be sent "to 
teach us what we shall do unto the child," Judges xiii. 8 ; 
and we have great encouragements to prayer, when we 
reflect on the fact, that one of the evident designs of the 
family constitution was the increase of true religious 
knowledge and piety. Those who seek grace then for 
those duties, by which they hope to promote the best in- 
terests of their children, are praying, so to speak, in the 
direction of God's purposes. We are also encouraged by 
the tender concern which the blessed Saviour manifested 
for these " little ones" when on earth, and may feel as- 
sured that though now raised to his glory he still " suf- 
fers" us to bring them to him, in the arms of parental 
affection and christian faith. 

II. The duty of thus presenting our children to God 
is one of early and constant force. From their birth and 
even previously to their birth, and on frequent and special 
occasions, as the recurrence of their birth-days, during 
seasons of sickness, when leaving home on visits or for 
school, and at other similar periods ; often, in family 
prayer, in secret prayer, in special prayer, "with and 
for them," and above all, most solemnly and devotedly, 
with " strong crying to God and tears," in the sacra- 
ment of Baptism, shouVj, -parents thus dedicate their chil- 
dren to the service and love, and worship and enjoyment of 
God, the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



67 



For a discussion of the authority, nature, obligations, 
and advantages of infant Baptism, our readers must be 
referred to the numerous able and excellent treatises which 
are easily accessible. Such a discussion would be here 
out of place, even did not our limits forbid its introduc- 
tion. Yet we may offer a few suggestions : 

(1.) Christians are intimately connected with Abra- 
ham by faith in Christ, and thus heirs of the promise. 
Gal. iii. 7, 29. 

(2.) The promise to Abraham, though including tem- 
poral blessings, was specially a promise of spiritual bless- 
ings, for Paul calls it the Gospel which was preached to 
Abraham. Gal. iii. 8. 

(3.) Of the covenant by which this promise was given, 
circumcision was the appointed sign and seal, and not a 
mere political rite. For it is said that Abraham received 
it as a seal of the righteousness of faith, Rom. iv. 10 ; 
that is, as a seal of the covenant. It was a seal of Abra- 
ham's accepting the conditions of that covenant, as well 
as of God's promise, in the covenant. 

(4.) But Baptism has come in the place of circumcision. 
Col. ii. 11, 12. In the Jewish church, circumcision was 
the initiatory rite, applied to the adults who were con- 
verts from heathenism. Ex. xii. 44-49. So is Baptism 
the initiatory rite of the Christian church, to be applied 
to all who profess their faith in Christ. The moral mean- 
ing of the rites is the same. cf. Rom. ii. 26 ; Col. ii. 11 ; 
1 Pet. iii. 21. 

(5.) Hence, as Christians are "^Abraham's seed," the 
Church under both dispensations is the same. Rom. 
xi. 17-24. 



68 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



(6.) And as children born of Jewish parents were thus 
entitled to circumcision, as by birth members of the visi- 
ble church, so children, born of Christian parents, are 
members of the visible church, and so entitled to Baptism, 
which is the sign of such membership. Gen. xvii. 14 ; 
Acts xvi. 15 ; Gal. iii. 27. 

( 7.) The children of one believing parent are entitled 
to this ordinance, just as Timothy was circumcised be- 
cause his mother was a Jewess, though his father was a 
Greek. 1 Cor. vii. 14 ; Acts xvi. 1-3. 

Christian parents, then, should bring their children to 
Christ in baptism, and thus secure for them those blessings, 
which are offered to us, in this ordinance. They should 
impress on their minds the duties they have been thus 
pledged to perform, and use every means to make this 
ordinance a means of grace. Larg. Cat., Q. 167. 

III. Under the obligations of the baptismal vow and 
in accordance with the nature of the family constitution, 
parents are bound to take care of the proper education 
of their children. We use the word education in its 
wide sense. It is that process by which we "lead" or 
"bring out" or train the faculties of body, mind, and 
heart.* Following an order, suggested by this threefold 
view of the nature of education, we proceed to mention 
those duties by the discharge of which parents may hope 
to secure its greatest benefits to their children. As we 
shall have occasion in the next chapter to discuss the 
means by which the education of children may be best 
conducted, we shall confine our remarks here to the 
statements and explanation of those duties, and some of 
* Educate, from the Latin Educo, to lead or bring out. 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



69 



the motives by which their performance may be en- 
forced. 

(1.) The instincts of nature so urgently induce parents, 
to provide for the bodily welfare of their children, that 
any suggestions on this subject may appear super- 
fluous. And, indeed, in respect to the physical educa- 
tion of very young children, parents, generally, less need 
admonitions to the performance of duty, than instruc- 
tions how to perform it properly. Yet even in such ca- 
ses, mistaken fondness may set aside the conviction of 
reason so far, as not only to involve wrong doing, but 
also to occasion a dereliction of duty. 

Physical education consists in a proper training of 
those functions of the body, by which a healthy, vigorous 
growth is secured. In respect to children of good natu- 
ral constitutions, the duty of the parent is to be exer- 
cised, chiefly in acts of prevention and restraint. No 
systems of artificial gymnastics can supply the place of m 
that bodily exercise, to which nature prompts the child. 
The parent is called on to restrain the indulgence of 
appetite, prevent needless exposure, excessive exertion, 
and the engagement in sports, which may endanger health 
or limbs. He must adopt appropriate means to secure 
the healthy action of the skin and digestive organs, the 
full development of the muscles, and the early formation, 
or rather continuance of those habits of activity and 
vigorous motion, to which a child of sound constitution 
is naturally disposed. It is all important, as children 
become the subjects of mental training, that parents use 
the most careful precaution against that excessive occu- 
pation of the mind, which depresses the animal spirits 



70 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



and weakens the body, by depriving it of suitable exer- 
cise. Even granting that the precocious development 
of the mental faculties is intrinsically desirable, the result 
is purchased at a ruinous cost, when the health and vig- 
our of the body are sacrificed in its accomplishment. 
We cannot too earnestly urge on the conscience of pa- 
rents and especially mothers, the duty of the most assidu- 
ous attention to the bodily health of their daughters. Cus- 
tom, fashion, the perverted preferences of society for what 
are misnamed "accomplishments" of female education, 
over substantial and valuable acquisitions of useful know- 
ledge and a sound intellectual discipline, are altogether 
tending to sap the physical constitutions of large classes 
of our population. The frail, sickly, nervous, dyspeptic, 
and often spinally deformed girls, who annually leave 
our fashionable female academies and private schools, 
conducted in residences of luxurious indulgence, present 
a poor promise of mothers for a healthy, vigorous race 
of sons and daughters. Nor are we without reasonable 
apprehensions, that posterity will have equal cause to 
reproach our age for neglecting the rearing of strong and 
well developed men. We do not desire the training of 
pugilists, prize-fighters, and rope-dancers; but feeble, 
sickly, half-grown graduates of universities and colleges, 
will have made a poor compensation to the nation, by 
all their learning, for its loss of sound bone and muscle 
in them and their descendants. Nor, indeed, will men- 
tal and moral soundness long survive the depreciation 
of bodily constitutions. Parents then, not only for their 
own happiness, and the happiness and well-being of their 
offspring, but also for the promotion of the prosperity 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



71 



of the nation, and the interests of true religion, are 
urged to the duty of wisely providing for the physical 
education of their children. 

( 2.) Parents are bound to secure to their children the 
best mental improvement, which their own circumstances 
and the natural capacity of the child will allow. It has 
ever been a distinction of our church, that she has care- 
fully promoted the intellectual as well as moral culture 
of the people. The obligations she imposes on parents 
in her baptismal service, if complied with, would secure 
for all her baptized children the fundamental element 
of all mental education, and the key to all knowledge, 
the art of reading. The majority of parents can per- 
sonally comply with so much of this part of parental duty 
as requires this instruction. And we remark, in passing, 
that, ordinarily, such personal compliance is the most 
efficient, for, in most cases, children who learn to read 
under parental teaching, make the best readers. But, 
whatever amount of instruction may be imparted and by 
whatever agency, parents should bear in mind, that in- 
struction is only a part of even mental education. They 
must also cultivate in their children a taste for reading 
and the acquisition of useful knowledge, train their 
memories to be retentive, quicken their powers of per- 
ception, cultivate their imagination, and as the reason- 
ing faculty begins to unfold its nature, aid its proper 
development. Of course this duty must be modified by 
the circumstances of parents, as to ability, leisure, or 
pecuniary means for employing the agencies of others. 
So also the varied capacities of children, considerations 
of health, or peculiarities of natural endowments, of in- 



72 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



clination, and taste, suggest questions as to specific du- 
ties, the discussion of which is neither important in this 
place, nor allowed by our limits. Still we feel free to say, 
that much culpable neglect of this important part of pa- 
rental duty has arisen from the popular prejudice, that 
an education, conducted beyond instruction in the ele- 
mentary branches, unfits the subject for the duties of 
plain life. There may be some just grounds for such 
an opinion, were the mind cultivated to the exclusion of 
the culture of the body. But the right training of the 
body is not only consistent with the culture of the mind, 
but it is an important auxiliary. Whatever be the fu- 
ture occupation for which the chijd is destined, the high- 
est degree of mental improvement which can be secured, 
will, so far from hindering success in any lawful pursuit 
of life, tend to prepare him for the more efficient prose- 
cution of his purposes. It is true, that mental, so far 
from superseding the necessity of moral education, is 
alone generally unproductive of moral benefit. Still 
ignorance is no more the mother of righteousness than 
of devotion. The ignorant are, by no means, exempted 
from the temptations of vice. 

Those parents act wisely who so highly appreciate their 
duty in this matter, that they readily make sacrifices of 
property to procure, for their children, the best available 
privileges of mental education. It can easily be shown, 
that on the score of economy, no better investment of 
money can be made for a child, than that expended for 
such a purpose. 

(3.) We are informed that one of the offices of the pre- 
paratory mission of John the Baptist, was " to turn the 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



73 



hearts of the fathers to their children." Luke i. 17. 
This somewhat obscure passage, it has been plausibly 
suggested, teaches that John was appointed to lead the 
degenerate Jewish people back to the wholesome but ne- 
glected customs of their ancestors, (Ps. Ixxviii. 3-8,) who 
were strictly enjoined to instruct their children in the 
facts and principles of revealed religion. Deut. xi. 18. 
It must be acknowledged, that some confirmation of this 
view is found in the adaptation of such a service to the 
leading purpose of John's mission, "to make ready a 
people prepared for the Lord." A reformation of fami- 
lies in this duty of religious teaching, would be a refor- 
mation of the nation, and one peculiarly important to 
John's object, in that the people would thus be led to a 
more careful study of those Scriptures, which testified of 
Christ. So also would " the disobedient" be turned to 
the " wisdom of the just," or true piety. 

But whether this view be adopted or not, the Scrip- 
tures most fully enforce the duty of parents to " bring up" 
or educate their children " in (or by) the nurture and ad- 
monition of the Lord." Eph. vi. 4. The approved ex- 
ample of Abraham, (Gen. xviii. 19,) the explicit direc- 
tions of Moses, (Deut. xi. 19; xxxi. 13 ; Ex. x. 2, 13, 14, 
15,) and the pious purpose expressed by the Psalmist, (Ps. 
Ixxviii. 3-8,) clearly unfold to us the Divine will as to this 
duty, under the Old Testament dispensation. Nor was the 
religious training confined to instruction. The book of 
Proverbs is replete with admonitions to parents not only to 
instruct their children, but also to discipline them. The 
sad example of Eli, " whose sons made themselves vile, 
and he restrained them not, (1 Sam. iii. 13,) is evidently 
7 



74 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



presented, as a warning against the neglect of parental 
discipline ; for it appears that he most faithfully and ten- 
derly admonished his wicked sons, (1 Sam. ii. 23-25,) but 
" he restrained them not." To instructions and admoni- 
tions to the performance of this duty, the Scriptures add 
encouragements. " Train up a child in the way he 
should go, and when he is old he will not depart from it." 
Prov. xxii. 6. This promise is confirmed by the many 
instances of piety produced by parental faithfulness which 
are presented in Scripture, such as Isaac, Jacob, Joseph, 
Moses, Samuel, David, Solomon, Josiah, and Timothy, as 
well as by the Scriptural view of the nature of the family 
constitution, which God has sanctified to the work of ex- 
tending true piety in the world. 

It is a most marvellous and lamentable inconsistency 
that parents, in the face of Scripture precept, example, 
admonition, and promise, so often neglect the religious 
care of their children, even when they have been dedi- 
cated to God in Baptism. This neglect is the more glar- 
ing, when combined with a proper care for the bodily and 
mental improvement of children, and especially, when 
the consequence of this. The best physicians may be 
sought to detect and repulse the lurking approaches of 
disease, or repair its ravages, or aid in the right devel- 
opment of the bodily organs. Costly journeys are 
taken to secure access to genial airs and healing foun- 
tains. Even expensive tailors and dress makers are 
hired to adorn the body. The best schools are sought, 
often with no regard to religious character, to provide 
instruction in letters. But with all this the soul may be 
left to perish for lack of knowledge. Well may we say 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



75 



to such parents, " These ought ye to have done, and not 
to leave the other undone." 

In the light of the Scriptures, a religious education 
consists in the careful inculcation of the truths of reve- 
lation, according to the child's capacity to receive them, 
and a judicious system of discipline, by which the child 
may be most effectually restrained from the indulgence 
of evil propensities, and be led to the formation of re- 
ligious habits. Parents must not only restrain them 
from evil, but avoid any conduct themselves which may, 
directly or indirectly, exert a bad influence. They are 
warned not to "provoke their children to wrath," (EpL 
vi. 4,) which is often done by undue severity, the capri- 
cious exercise of authority, partiality, or other injustice. 
They must avoid sowing the seeds of evil in their hearts, 
as they would imbuing their bodily constitutions with 
poison. The indulgence of any sinful habit or the ex- 
pression of sinful emotions, as anger, jealousy, hatred, 
revenge, and the like, in the presence of children, are 
thus forbidden. Let them especially beware of ever de- 
ceiving their children. They thus set an example of 
falsehood, and weaken that confidence which is one of 
the brightest and strongest links that bind children to 
parents. They must train them to revere and study the 
Scriptures, and although, till the heart shall have been 
truly renewed by God's Spirit, they will not render a 
Christian obedience to God's law, still they may be 
trained to the great moral virtues of honesty, fair deal- 
ing, tenderness, gentleness, justice, and humanity. They 
may be led to form habits of daily prayer, reading the 
Scriptures, and reverence for the Sabbath and the sane- 



76 



FAMILY KELIGION. 



tuary. As these are important means, by which they 
may be brought under the operation of religious truth, 
and not practices to be substituted for a religious life, 
the parent must, most earnestly and importunately, seek 
the Divine blessing, by which alone he can expect to re- 
alize the ultimate design of his performance of duty, the 
saving conversion of his children to God. Parents are 
urged to this duty, not only by the considerations which 
are connected with its nature, and that of the .family 
constitution, but also by a regard for the welfare of their 
families, the interests of society, and the everlasting sal- 
vation of their children. For the principles of Chris- 
tian faith underlie those moral principles, which sustain 
peace and order in the family, promote the interchange 
of kind offices, restrain and moderate the ebullitions of 
evil passions, and encourage and strengthen right affec- 
tions and habits. It is obvious that the virtues which 
are nourished in the family, will be those illustrated in 
society. The customs, confidence, and courtesies of oiy* 
ordinary intercourse, the laws which regulate our rela- 
tions, and the sanctions which sustain those laws, have all 
thus grown up under the fostering influences of true 
piety. 

Even a regard to a wise economy of our resources, 
admonishes us to train our children on religious princi- 
ples. Youth needs amusement and relaxation, and those 
which are consistent with true piety, are far cheaper than 
those which vicious propensities demand. Many is the 
drunken or debauched son, or the frivolous pleasure- 
loving daughter, who expends far more in the pursuit of 
forbidden enjoyment, than all the religious privileges of 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



7T 



a family cost. But that which should most excite our 
sluggish souls to a prayerful performance of this duty, is 
the consideration of the spiritual interests of children. If 
they die during infancy, we entertain a pleasing confidence 
of their everlasting happiness, as a part of Christ's pur- 
chased possession, and belonging to the kingdom of God. 
But should they remain, after reaching the period of ac- 
countability, unreconciled to God, there is no guaranty, 
merely in virtue of their birth of Christian parents, their 
baptism, membership in the visible church, and title to 
its instructions and prayers, that their hearts will be re- 
newed. It is only by the blessing of God on all the 
means which ought to be used, that such a result can 
be expected ; and surely a neglect by parents of those 
which it is their special duty to employ, must greatly 
weaken any expectation of their children's salvation 
which they might be disposed to entertain. That God 
may and does convert the children of parents thus negli- 
gent, is true, but his promise is to Christian parents who 
perform their duties and to their seed. 

Among all forms of human sorrow, what more excites 
our pity, than that of parents, mourning over the wreck 
of all their fond anticipations, in the hopeless profligacy 
of a son, or the "living death" of a beloved daughter ! 
What so grates on a parental ear as the words of an un- 
grateful child ! And over what grave are to be found 
so few, and such dim rays of comfort, as over that of 
youth, dying from disease, the fruit of early formed, un- 
checked, and indelibly fixed vicious principles ! If we 
would deliver our children and ourselves from such mourn- 
7* 



78 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



fill calamities, let us diligently engage in the sacred duty 
of training them for God ! 

IV. We have thus far spoken of parental duties as 
they pertain to botk parents. But it is generally true, 
that owing to the father's engagements, the performance 
of some of the most important devolves chiefly on the 
mother. This at once displays the admirable wisdom 
of God, and greatly enhances her responsibilities. 

Moralists, poets, and philosophers have vied with each 
other, in celebrating the relation and moral influence of 
woman. She sings the lullaby at our cradles ; catches 
with joy the first rays of intelligence, which beam from 
our infant eyes ; first pours into our minds the wonders 
of redeeming love ; teaches our trembling steps the ways 
of life ; watches our wandering feet, when they stray from 
God ; soothes our broken hearts with the sweet promises 
of the gospel, and sustains our drooping spirits by the 
sure words of hope. In doubt she is our counsellor, in 
adversity our comforter, and when fortune fails and 
friends desert us, she inspires us with her own confidence 
and hope, by the assurance that we have her faithful 
love. As the last scenes of life approach, she watches 
our dying pillow, with moistened cheek whispers to our 
departing souls the consolations of her faith, and not 
till the last glimpse of flickering life has died on our 
deadened eye-balls, and she has closed their lids, does 
this first, last, best friend surrender her trust. 

Those qualities which distinguish wife, sister, and daugh- 
ter, concentrate in the mother, with the addition of the 
instincts which belong to the relation, wherever existing. 
It is to her, thus fitted to instruct ignorance, sustain 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



79 



feebleness, awaken energy and alleviate distress, that 
God, in the wise economy of the family constitution, has 
assigned the most important post of moral agency. As 
the child draws from her breasts the first nourishment 
of the frail body, so from the fountains of her love, it 
derives the first food of the immortal soul. As by her 
sensitive ear, its cry of distress is most quickly discerned, 
so to her tender heart its appeals for help are never 
made in vain. On her falls the duty of giving the first 
direction to its capacities for right, and imposing the first 
restraints on its tendencies to wrong. The hold on the 
child, acquired by these intimate relations to its early 
life, is retained through all the years of its subjection to 
parental authority, unless severed by some sinful cause. 
By this means, as her children grow up around her, she 
becomes the sympathizing friend, teacher, and counsellor, 
and through life remains united to them, by a bond 
of the tenderest ties and most enduring power. 

Corresponding to her position in respect to her chil- 
dren, are her special duties. To her care, must be as- 
signed the formation of their manners, their decent ap- 
pearance in society, and the regulation of their household 
duties. It is her part to see that they attend to their 
daily studies, prepare their lessons for Sabbath-school 
and the catechetical class, are in their places at family 
worship, and in the house of God. Besides the duties 
to her daughters, which she shares with her husband, 
she is especially appointed their adviser in their most 
delicate and important interests both of body and soul. 
She must watch, with her unerring instincts, against the 
formation of habits pernicious to health ; direct them in 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



dress ; instruct them in the minutiae of household duties, 
which, however intrinsically unimportant in detail, yet 
in the aggregate, are material contributions to family 
comfort and order ; carefully prescribe and control their 
demeanour to the other sex, and guide them to under- 
stand and illustrate the true dignity of woman. 

V. Parental duties do not cease with the period of the 
children's subjection as members of the family circle. 
Parents will still impart to their children judicious coun- 
sel and aid them in their lawful pursuits, by the lessons 
of their own experience. 

According to their ability they ought to render suita- 
ble pecuniary aid to their children when they settle in 
life. As to the amount, proportion to their prospective in- 
heritance, and similar topics, no specific suggestions are 
required. It is perhaps best on this subject, to act on 
the general principle of avoiding equally one extreme 
position, according to which, children should be left to 
their own resources, and the other, according to which, 
they should be at once supplied with all to which they 
might ever expect to lay claim. 

Every head of a family should have a will always ready. 
Let such be drawn up in proper legal mode, and accurately 
and clearly prescribe the disposition of property. Espe- 
cially let testators avoid all appearance of partiality, or 
undue discrimination among their children. Thus heart- 
burnings, litigations, and alienations of near relatives 
will be avoided. Ordinarily, men had best be the exe- 
cutors of their own donations to benevolent objects, so 
as to leave their children no ground to feel that their 
rights had been invaded for charitable purposes. 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



81 



Finally, let parents avoid improper interference be- 
tween their children, and their " children's children." 
By advice, they may render their children great aid in 
their new and untried position ; and if residents of the 
same house, be eminently useful as teachers and guides 
of their young grand- children. But they should beware 
of presuming on their position, and not forget that their 
children are also parents. The only grand-parent whose 
special relation to children seems to have claimed the no- 
tice of the Spirit of inspiration, was Lois. 2 Tim. i. 5. 
Let her example encourage, stimulate, and direct others 
to secure like celebrity, as not only the possessor of faith, 
but the successful teacher of its principles to the third 
generation. 

When grand-parents are entrusted with the manage- 
ment of the orphaned children of their sons or daughters^ 
they are placed under the responsibilities of parents, and 
should feel the additional obligations, which arise from the 
circumstances of peculiar tenderness, with which their 
relation becomes invested. So also older brothers or 
sisters, or other relatives, on whom parental duties to 
orphan children have devolved, are placed in a position, 
to the duties of which the remarks now offered must 
apply. 

Sec. IV. The Responsibilities and Duties of Children. 

According to the nature of the family constitution, the 
filial relation is one of dependence and obligation. 
Hence arises the great law which prescribes the duties 
of this relation. This is the law of filial obedience. It 
is a law of nature, the obligation of which is recognized, 
to a greater or less extent, in all states of society. This 



82 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



law, as well as all others which affect man's moral interests 
and relations, is more clearly taught in the Holy Scrip- 
tures. God enounced it as one of those " ten words," 
(Ex. xxxiv. 28, margin,) or laws of immutable and uni- 
versal obligation, which he declared amidst the fire and 
smoke of Sinai. " Honour thy father and thy mother, 
that thy days may be long upon the land, which the Lord 
thy God giveth thee." Ex. xx. 12. Our Saviour re- 
enacted this law, when he vindicated it from the false in- 
terpretations of the Pharisees, (Mark vii. 10-13,) who 
by their traditions had virtually set aside its authority ; 
and he condescended at once to explain and illustrate 
its teaching, by being "subject" during childhood and 
youth, to his earthly parents. Luke ii. 57. The apos- 
tles introduce it among their precepts for the instruction 
of mankind in the relative duties of life, expound its nature, 
and enforce its obligations. Paul interprets " honour" 
used in the fifth commandment, by "obey," thus indica- 
ting that obedience is the fundamental principle of the 
commandment, and will produce that reverential regard, 
which is denoted by the more general term: "Children, 
obey your parents in all things, for this is well pleasing 
unto the Lord." Col. iii. 20. Elsewhere, (Eph. vi. 1-3,) 
he appends to this precept, given in substantially the 
same terms, a quotation of the commandment in the 
words of the preceptive portion, with a modification of 
those which express the appended promise. 

1. According to these inspired declarations, we learn 
that this obedience is required "in all things." This 
very comprehensive phrase teaches how the law of obe- 
dience is the foundation of all the prescriptions of filial 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



83 



duties. The only limitation to which this requisition is 
liable, is expressed by the words " in the Lord ; for this 
is right," or, as the same idea is elsewhere (Col. iii. 20) 
expressed, " for this is well pleasing unto the Lord." In 
these words, we have a farther definition of the nature 
of filial obedience, as well as a limitation on its extent. 
We are thus* taught that it must be rendered, like 
that of the wife, on Christian principle, with a proper 
sense of accountability to the Lord Jesus Christ. As pa- 
rents are thus inhibited from requiring their children to 
do any thing which violates the obligations of Christian 
duty, so children are taught, that the performance of 
their duties to parents, is not suspended on the personal 
character of the parent, or their own feeling of depend- 
ence or obligation, or any other contingency, but on the 
immutable authority of God. In the combination of 
these defining phrases we are therefore taught, that the 
obedience of children, as that on Christian principle, must 
be prompt, implicit, and cheerful ; not that sullen, reluc- 
tant submission of a forced will, but the ready, good-na- 
tured compliance of an affectionate heart ; and that it is 
due to all the lawful commands of parents. It is true, 
that by reason of sin, the performance of the duties of 
this filial, as of other relations, may be much embar- 
rassed. The misconduct, and even tyranny of godless 
parents, produces cases of great hardship. But in no 
case are children absolved from their allegiance to pa- 
rents, except when the commands of the latter are con- 
trary to the commands of God ; and even then, a course 
of Christian forbearance and patience may do more to 
effect relief, than that of positive rebellion. No recon- 



84 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



struction of society can provide a better agent for the 
protection and care and training of children than the pa- 
rent. The family is " the earliest, cheapest, safest, 
mightiest institution," to secure to children the instruc- 
tion and aid they need. The evils contemplated then 
must be endured. This is better than to jeopard the 
good, which is provided by the law of filial obedience, by 
vain efforts to avoid its abuses. 

To return — the obligation of this law of obedience is 
enforced by the promise annexed. Paul's introduction 
of the promise and the language in which he gives it, 
are thus interpreted by a recent, able expositor of the 
passage.* " This is the prime commandment; the first 
in importance, among those relating to our social duties, 
and it has the specific promise annexed : It shall be 
well with thee." Whether this view be adopted, or that 
which, by " first," designates simply the order of this 
commandment, in the second table of the decalogue, it is 
very evident, that the annexation of the "promise," is 
an important feature in the statement here presented. 
Generalizing the words, as given in the decalogue by 
Moses, which had a special reference to the residence of 
the Jews in Palestine, Paul makes them applicable to 
obedient children every where. Among the Jews, the 
rebellious son was condemned to condign punishment by 
the hands of the civil power. Deut. xxi. 18-21. Solo- 
mon's counsels to children, (Prov. i. 8 ; iv. 1-12 ; vi. 20- 
22,) and his frequent warnings against filial wickedness, 
(Prov. xvii. 21, 25; xix. 26; xx. 20; xxx. 17,) show 
that even under the Old Testament dispensation, the 
* Dr. Hodge on Ephesians, vi. 1-3. 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



85 



specific form of the promise was an indication of the 
general blessing of "prosperity and happiness" of which 
"long life" is so often used as the expressive symbol. 
Ps. lxi. 6 ; xci. 16. Prov. iii. 2. Such is the principle 
of the Divine government now, as the observation and ex- 
perience of men attest, though liable, as other general 
principles, to such exceptions as the arrangements of 
God's providence may demand; and its operation is ex- 
emplified as to individuals, " as far as it shall serve for 
God's glory and their own good." S. Cat. Q. 66. 

To all the regulations of parents respecting dress, 
manners, play-mates, hours of rising and retiring, food, 
recreations, labour, the use of medicine, or other means 
of recovery from sickness, or relief from pain ; and what- 
ever else may affect their own welfare and happiness, or 
the order and comfort of the household, children must 
submit. Even the most trivial matters to which allusion 
has been made, may have very important relations, and, 
at all events, it is by disobedience in such, that habits 
of disobedience are gradually formed, which may ulti- 
mately undermine authority. There are, doubtless, many 
short graves in our church-yards, whose tenants might 
have been alive, but for their resistance to parental 
authority in regard to food or medicine, or some similar 
matter. 

2. When young persons approach that period of life, 
which has been called the age of discretion, or the boun- 
dary between childhood and youth, or have actually be- 
come capable of the proper exercise of reason, many 
occasions arise, to test the power of the great principle 

of filial obedience. Then the influence of motives to 
8 



86 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



obedience, drawn from the fitness of the case, the right 
of parents to command, or filial affection, may be invoked, 
to secure a proper regard to parental authority ; but 
underlying all these, without whose support they may 
fail of effect, is this law of God : " Obey your pa- 
rents in the Lord." Hence, throughout the period of 
youth, children should continue, most implicitly, to re- 
vere the authority of their parents. Thus, (1.) they should 
select their associates and their books, which may be the 
most dangerous or most profitable companions, accord- 
ing to the direction of their parents. (2.) Let them be 
cautious in spending the money with which they may be 
entrusted, in any way contrary to parental wishes, ex- 
pressed or implied ; and to secure a check on any ten- 
dency to depart from this rule, let them keep a careful 
account of expenditures, and submit it to the inspection 
of their parents. A regard to these suggestions is en- 
forced by the lamentable evils, which often ensue by 
their neglect, in the formation of vicious principles and 
habits, under the influence of "evil communications," 
whether of persons or of books, and the rise and growth 
of dispositions to concealment as well as to extrava- 
gance. 

(3.) Children should have no secrets from their pa- 
rents. They should early and constantly cultivate the 
most unreserved intercourse with these, their natural 
guardians, and best friends ; repose on them their entire 
confidence, consult them on all occasions of doubt and 
trial, and meet with frankness and candour all their ad- 
vances to encourage such confidence. Many a youth 
has commenced a course of fatal defection from truth 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



8T 



and duty, by making confidants of indiscreet or evil-minded 
persons, and concealing his sentiments and plans from 
his kind and judicious parents. 

(4.) Youth are often solicited to engage in what some 
term " innocent amusements," such as dancing-parties, 
or games of chance, or perhaps to attend the theatre or 
race-ground. A consent to such solicitations, " only 
once," it is urged, " can do no harm." But such a con- 
sent does not "honour" parents, whose disapprobation 
is well known, whether any perceptible evil be inflicted 
on the disobedient child or not, in a particular case. It 
is well known, that, even granting an innocent or indif- 
ferent character to pertain to a particular act of dancing, 
or gaming, or attending the theatre, it paves the way 
for another, and but few repetitions are necessary to in- 
duce a taste for amusements of this kind, which proves 
a snare of souls, and leads to vices, that often drown men 
in perdition. The best security for youth is, therefore, 
not in their reasoning but in strict obedience to parents. 

( 5.) Youth and even children who have advanced in 
their education, beyond the elementary stage, are often 
tempted to question the propriety of pursuing some par- 
ticular branch of study, deemed important by their pa- 
rents or teachers, to whom parents have confided the 
conduct of that part of their education. It is needless 
to remark that mistakes are often made by the most ju- 
dicious parents and teachers in such matters. But we 
cannot discuss exceptions. Ordinarily, they are the 
best judges. At all events, the pupil is not the proper 
judge. He can know nothing of the absolute or relative 
value of Latin, Greek, or mathematics. Let him sedu- 



88 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



lously aim to comply with parental wishes. Sometimes 
parents, whose means do not permit them to give their 
children a liberal education, endeavour to have them 
trained to some honest and useful occupation, by which 
they may earn a livelihood, and such should cheerfully 
adopt the course thus indicated. In all such cases, 
disobedience or a wilful neglect of the proffered advan- 
tages of a preparation for the duties of life, almost ine- 
vitably leads to lamentable results. In either case, a 
disobedient child, if not able fully to have his way, will 
perhaps so conduct himself as to disappoint the parent. 
Neglect of due diligence in study or labour, resulting in 
ignorance for knowledge and inefficiency for capacity, 
lays the foundation of greater evils. Perhaps the teacher 
or master mechanic, worn out by incorrigible conduct, 
dismisses the boy in such disgrace, that all similar ad- 
vantages with others are forfeited. Unfit for the sphere 
of life to which they had been destined, and by lost time 
and the habits of idleness formed, prevented from seek- 
ing any other, such youth often become the grief of 
parents, useless drones, and successful candidates for 
graduation in the school of vice. Or if, with some par- 
tial acquirements, they undertake the duties of a call- 
ing, failure and disappointment from incompetency add 
strength to those habits of idleness which have been 
partially contracted in their efforts to elude or resist pa- 
rental authority. For though discouraged from labour, 
Satan, who " ever finds some mischief still for idle hands 
to do," encourages them to vice and dissipation. Idle- 
ness and vicious indulgences, alternately causes and ef- 
fects, soon bring their inglorious career to a close, in the 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



89 



appropriate graves of obscurity and infamy. The Sab- 
bath-breaker, the thief, the highwayman, the pick-pocket, 
and the murderer have often dated their disgrace and 
misery from the first act of disobedience. Numerous youth 
of both sexes, and all grades of society, may be found, 
in all parts of our land, who most painfully illustrate the 
evils of filial disobedience. How many half educated or 
half-trained young persons are there, who idly doze away 
their mornings in the sluggard's slumbers, spend their 
days in lounging, tattling, and gossipping, and their eve- 
nings in frivolous gaieties, or the perusal of pernicious 
books ; while their parents laboriously toil for the support 
of their useless, and worse than ungrateful, sons and 
daughters ! 

(6.) Let not children despise the moral restraints and 
religious instruction of their parents. Even should they 
not appreciate their value, they ought to submit cheer- 
fully to the use of all those means, by which parents may 
endeavour to train them for heaven. Let them beware 
of yielding to the sophistical suggestions of their own 
hearts, or of wicked men, that no benefit will arise from 
instructions which they neither appreciate nor desire, 
and restraints which are unsuitable to the season of 
youth. Some such suggestions will be discussed in a 
succeeding chapter. Chapter vi. It should be enough 
for children to feel that their parents desire, and also 
know, what will best promote their welfare ; and though 
they may not appreciate their commands, let them obey. 

3. When youth approach the period of adult life, al- 
though they may not be subject to the same methods of 
parental control as at earlier periods, they should still 
8* 



90 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



be governed by the spirit of the great law of filial obe- 
dience. Should they have grown up disobedient, they 
will rarely reform, except by the intervention of God's 
grace. But if they have been obedient children, under 
right culture, they will more readily continue to yield 
submission to parental authority, when the convictions 
of reason and the dictates of enlightened conscience shall 
have come to sustain its requisitions, and especially, 
when a right home culture has been attended by the 
promised blessing of a Divine renewal. Ps. lxxviii. 5-7. 

(1.) As those requisitions assume more and more the 
character of advice, so the grounds of conformity will be- 
come more and more those of reverential regard. Such 
youth, amidst all the glowing hopes of that ardent 
period, will still entertain moderate estimates of their 
own powers, and defer to the guidance of parents. When 
these, by their education or position, have entitled them- 
selves to such deference, this respect for their authority is 
obviously as easy as it is amiable. But it often happens, 
in our rapidly progressive land, that parents rear fami- 
lies of children to the enjoyment of far greater privileges 
than they ever possessed, especially as to the advantages 
of education. Now young persons, whose fathers and 
mothers are thus intellectually their inferiors, will often 
be tempted to slight their advice, even on subjects within 
the limits of their knowledge and capacities. This is a 
violation of the great law of reverence due to parents. 
Sensible persons will not demand more respect than that 
to which they are entitled, and children, properly reared, 
will be ready to defer to the opinions which claim that 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



91 



deference, as well because they are those of parents as for 
their correctness. 

(2.) On no subjects are youth more liable to violate 
the spirit of the Divine command, which we are consider- 
ing, than on those of marriage and its antecedents. 
Many, otherwise dutiful and respectful to parents, be- 
come so far the dupes of the false views which often 
prevail, that they studiously avoid all consultation with 
them, on the propriety of their preferences, or the meth- 
ods to be adopted for securing success in their matri- 
monial projects. Some proceed so far, in this palpable dis- 
regard of parental control, as to evade those laws which in- 
hibit marriage when under age, except on the permission 
of parents, by escaping, like culprits, beyond the juris- 
diction of the State of their residence. 

Now with all reasonable concessions for the force of 
mutual attachments, and with the admission that parents 
may sometimes be unreasonable in their objections, we 
must contend, that these palliations of this very popular 
kind of disrespect and disobedience, are not a justifica- 
tion. The error begins in a want of that confidence 
which children should cultivate. It is aggravated by a 
false view of the nature of marriage, of which we have 
before spoken. Passion may mislead the judgment, but 
true love implies its exercise. Young persons should 
abstain from associating with those, a union with whom 
would incur parental displeasure. These remarks apply 
particularly to females, inasmuch as few males marry 
under legal age. In so far, however, as they commit 
themselves, while under age, to a connection disap- 
proved of by parents, they violate parental and State 



92 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



law in effect, though the connection be not formed till 
they are legally permitted to act independently. Both 
parties incur great risk. A young woman should be 
guarded how she subjects herself to one who has not 
learned to obey ; and a young man, how he takes to his 
bosom one who begins a life of professed obedience in 
one relation, by an act of distressing and insulting diso-' 
bedience in another. It has been often observed that 
such marriages, with few exceptions, prove unhappy; 
thus sustaining the old adage, that an undutiful son or 
daughter does not make a good husband or wife. 

(3.) Indeed, in whatever relates to a settlement in 
life, as the choice of a profession, the location for busi- 
ness, and the methods of prosecuting it, dutiful children 
will yield readily to the advice of those, of whose good 
will they can have no suspicion, even should the propriety 
of some of their suggestions be questioned. As they be- 
come engaged in the active pursuits of life, let them 
never permit the most engrossing occupations of their 
callings, to prevent them from showing to their parents 
marks of respect, by visiting and cheering them amidst 
the infirmities of age, and aiding them, if poor, by contri- 
butions to their support. How touchingly beautiful are 
these eminent examples of filial piety, afforded in the 
lives of Joseph and David ! The former, amidst all his 
glory and royal dignities in Egypt was mindful of his 
aged father, and brought him to be " nourished in the 
best of the land," (Gren. xlvii. 12,) and the latter, when 
a hunted fugitive, before the envenomed rage of a pow- 
erful and vicious rival, found the means to provide a se- 
cure refuge for his father and mother, till he could know 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



93 



what God would do for him. 1 Sam. xxiL 3. And 
with what tenderness, did the blessed Jesus, in the last 
moments of his expiring agonies, when "he saw his mo- 
ther and the disciple standing by whom he loved," say 
"unto his mother, Woman, behold thy son," and "to 
the disciple, Behold thy mother I" John xix. 26, 27. 
Children should show a filial regard for parents, after 
their death, by scrupulously executing their wills. Even 
should there have been made an injudicious distribution 
of property, let no reflection be cast on the honour of 
the parent, by a refusal to abide his decisions. Rather 
let children submit to injustice, if they innocently may 
do so, than tarnish the reputation of a parent, by the 
expression of a suspicion of his fairness. 

Children who have families of their own will derive 
great aid to their efforts in training their children, by 
thus conducting themselves in regard to their own pa- 
rents. Their example will deeply impress their sons and 
daughters with feelings of respect and veneration for 
them ; and thus, while rendering a tribute of duty and 
affection to those who are passing away, they will be 
preparing those who come after, to entertain and evince 
like sentiments towards themselves. 

To their teachers, as far as they occupy the place 
and perform the duties of parents, children owe the 
same kind of obedience and honour, during their tempo- 
rary relation. They should behold in the teacher, only 
a substituted parent, and nothing would more tend to 
smooth the paths of teachers and pupils, than the culti- 
vation of a reverential regard for the former, in the 
minds of the latter. 



94 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



Indeed, it would be easy to show that the spirit of the 
Bible law ought to influence the young in their demeanor 
to all their seniors in age and superiors in authority. 
" Thou shalt rise up before the hoary head, and honour 
the face of the old man," (Lev. xix. 32,) is the inspired 
precept. A proper regard to the opinions and feelings 
of older men will exercise a healthy conservative influ- 
ence on the opinions of the young, and thus on that of 
society, in which they must soon be actors. Could we 
see this great law of subordination fully recognized in 
the conduct of those who are now young, we might well 
rejoice in the future of our country. When in virtues, 
as well as vigour, " our sons are as plants grown up in 
their youth," and "our daughters as corner-stones, pol- 
ished after the similitude of a palace," we may well ex- 
claim, " Happy is that people that is in such a case." 
Ps. cxliv. 12-15. That such may be our case, let 
us earnestly endeavour to inculcate on all children, 
in families and in secular and Sabbath-schools, the prin- 
ciples and duties of the Divine law of obedience. 

OF BROTHERS AND SISTERS. 

The Scriptures have not included the relation of 
brothers and sisters, among those whose duties are 
made the subject of special instruction. Yet the com- 
mon relation they sustain to common parents, and the 
influence of their conduct to each other, not only on the 
peace and order of the house, but on all the means of 
parental government, will justify a few suggestions on 
their relative duties. 

The parental admonitions to the cultivation of kind- 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



95 



ness, gentleness, forbearance, meekness, tenderness, for- 
giveness, self-denial, generosity, and benevolence in their 
intercourse, if duly heeded, will ensure the performance 
of their mutual duties. Brothers especially owe to sis- 
ters the most marked politeness, that which springs from 
the heart-felt desire to make others happy. They should 
cultivate the habit of showing them the deference due to 
their sex, yielding to them the first places in the domes- 
tic circle, and endeavouring to promote their comfort 
and happiness. Boys are often known to lavish such 
attentions on other girls, while neglectful of their sisters. 
However proper the one course, the other is wrong. Let 
sisters, on the other hand, not be exacting in demands on 
their brothers. They may make them full amends for 
their deference, by contributing to their entertainment 
while in doors. They will thus materially aid in culti- 
vating in their hearts a love of home, and few boys are 
in danger from temptations, who truly love home. They 
may greatly aid in checking the natural tendency of 
boys to rudeness, soften their manners, and, at the same 
time, greatly encourage them to diligence in duty, man- 
liness, and uprightness. There is a mighty power for 
good in the influence of a gentle, loving sister on a bro- 
ther. The older should aid parents in instructing and 
training the younger, not by domineering or usurping 
authority over them, but by the kind and gentle deeds 
of sympathy, by aiding them in their lessons, encourag- 
ing them to effort, preparing means for their innocent 
amusement, and, above all, by setting an example of the 
virtues which they ought to imitate. 

The Scriptures have used these terms of relationship, 



96 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



to express that of the members of Christ's church, thus 
not only sanctifying them, but also intimating the ten- 
der and endearing intimacy of the relation : and our 
Lord has been pleased to reveal himself to his people as 
their " elder Brother." Christians are exhorted to " love 
as brethren." Let brothers and sisters love as Chris- 
tians, be faithful in their common and their mutual du- 
ties, and thus enhance the value and the loveliness of the 
family constitution. 

Sec. Y. The responsibilities and duties of Masters 
and Servants. 

The necessities of every civilized community demand 
a class of labourers who sustain the position of inferiors 
to those whom they serve. 

This state of society has occasioned several topics of 
inquiry, belonging properly to the science of political 
economy, which we are not here called to discuss. They 
are topics, on which the sacred writers have forborne to 
instruct us, as they have also on similar subjects touch- 
ing the various forms of civil government. But they 
have very distinctly recognized the relation of master 
and servant, and fully taught the nature and obligations 
of the duties of both parties. Indeed, no relation of 
this life has received more attention from the writers of 
the New Testament. Our Saviour uses its tenor to il- 
lustrate the relation of himself and his disciples, incident- 
ally recognizing the superiority of the master and the 
subjection of the servant. Luke xvii. 7-9; xxii. 27. 
John xiii. 16. Paul, in several of his Epistles, (1 Cor. 
vii. 20-22. Eph.vi.5-9. Col.iii.22. lTim.vi.1-6. Tit. 
ii. 9-10. Philemon 10-17,) and Peter, ( 1 Pet. ii. 18-20,) 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



97 



have fully explained the nature, and earnestly urged the 
obligation of the duties of both parties. These full and 
frequent inspired teachings on this subject were pecu- 
liarly pertinent, because, during the apostolic age and 
wherever Christian churches were formed, there existed 
a form of servitude, peculiarly severe and oppressive on 
servants, and which exposed masters to unusual tempta- 
tions to an abuse of power. Both masters and servants 
were among the converts to Christianity ; and the sacred 
writers, without discussing any questions touching the 
expediency or necessity of the relation, but treating it as 
a fact in the constitution of society, apply the princi- 
ples of the gospel in defining and enforcing the duties to 
which it gives rise. 

Of several passages already referred to, we quote the 
following, as presenting a connected exposition as well as 
an excellent and comprehensive summary of the inspired 
teachings. 

" Servants, be obedient to them that are your masters, 
according to the flesh, with fear and trembling, in single- 
ness of your heart, as unto Christ. Not with eye-service 
as men-pleasers, but as the servants of Christ, doing the 
will of God from the heart ; with good will doing service, 
as unto the Lord, and not unto men ; knowing that what- 
soever good thing any man doeth, the same shall he re- 
ceive of the Lord, whether he be bond or free. And ye 
masters, do the same things unto them, forbearing threat- 
ening ; knowing that your Master is in heaven ; neither 
is there respect of persons with him." Eph. vi. 5-9. 

In this and the parallel passage in Colossians, the 
duties of servants appear to be more specially and fully 
9 



98 ' FAMILY RELIGION. 



expounded than those of masters. We observe also that 
both in the Epistles to Timothy, and that to Titus, and 
in the Epistle of Peter, they are fully presented, while no 
special address is made to masters. This peculiarity of 
the apostolical teaching on this relation is partly ex- 
plained by the obvious consideration, that servants are 
liable to the influence of peculiarly strong temptations to 
neglect of duty, and are, at the same time, exposed to 
suffer under a tyrannical abuse of authority, by which, in 
this sinful world, at all times their lot has been signalized. 
Hence they need the more emphatic admonitions to duty, 
and the more pointed exhortations to persevere in well 
doing, amidst all the untoward circumstances of their sit- 
uation. But if we consider the phrase, " Ye masters, do 
the same things unto them," we shall have reason for 
regarding masters as more fully exhorted, than the brief 
portion expressly addressed to them might seem to imply. 
All that regard for Christian principle, which is urged on 
servants for the regulation of their conduct, thus becomes 
as fully applicable to masters. Indeed, as the duties are 
correlative, we may infer that whatever be the conduct to 
which servants are exhorted ought to meet corresponding 
conduct on the part of masters ; so that if the former are 
to render an " earnest, conscientious, and religious ser- 
vice," the latter must exercise an earnest, conscientious, 
and religious government." Eadie on Eph. vi. 9. 

I. The word " master," is the translation of a Greek 
word, Kvpiog, meaning lord, owner or possessor. The more 
common term, A«nror»?s, to designate one sustaining this re- 
lation, used in other places, (1 Tim. vi. 1. 1 Pet. ii. 18,) 
is indicative of absolute control or despotic authority. 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



99 



1. This authority however, is limited by the phrase 
"according to the flesh," which distinguishes the master 
on earth, from the Master in heaven. His control only 
extends to that which is external. His right to the la- 
bour of the servant does not imply a right to control his 
conscience. The soul of the servant is free. The mas- 
ter may not abridge his religious privileges, to which he 
is entitled according to his station in life, nor can he 
justly hinder his performance of religious duties. The 
master's right does not include a right to abuse or injure 
his person by cruelty, or to use him for other purposes 
than those which are implied in the right to fruits of his 
reasonable labour. 

The master's authority is farther limited by the phrase, 
"do the same things to them," as already suggested ; this 
means that the master as well as the servant must sub- 
ject his conduct to the control of Christian motives and 
principles. He must rule as subject "to the Lord," as 
"fearing God," and as " doing the will of God from the 
heart." As the servants of "believing masters" must 
not "despise them, because they are brethren," so mas- 
ters of believing servants must treat those servants as 
brethren, though brethren in an inferior station of life. 

Though the power of the master is despotic, the des- 
potism is not that of an irresponsible ruler, but that of 
the family constitution, as prescribed by God and having 
its foundation in love. The master must love his ser- 
vant, not as an equal, but as a servant, and accordingly 
treat him with all that consideration of his welfare, 
which the relation subsisting permits and requires. 

2. The general principle of such treatment is thus 



100 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



laid down: "Masters, give unto your servants that 
which is just and equal." Col. iv. 1. The servant, in 
authority, station, and other circumstances of social life, 
is inferior to the master. But this inferiority does not 
destroy the social and domestic rights and privileges 
which belong to him as a human being, in the sphere in 
which God has been pleased to place him. Such he may 
forfeit, as others may, by crime, or he may lose them 
by unavoidable dispensations of Providence ; but in no 
case is such forfeiture a necessary incident of his condi- 
tion as a servant.* This precept farther inculcates on 
masters the duty of fairly compensating servants for 
their labour. Peculiar circumstances connected with the 
commercial condition, and other interests of particular 
portions of the country and the world, so vary the value 
of labour and the cost of living, — and individual interests 
are necessarily so modified by those of the class to which 
they belong, that it is impracticable to lay down specific 
rules for regulating the conduct of masters in the par- 
ticular, now under consideration. This much, however, 
may be regarded as a sound exposition of Scripture 
teaching capable of general application. Masters must 
avoid taking advantage of the necessitous and dependent 

* We are pleased to know, that under the influence of a healthy 
public sentiment throughout our Southern States, a growing respect 
for the sanctity of the family union among servants has long existed. 
In some states, public sentiment alone very generally prevents its 
needless violation ; and in others laws, vigorously enforced, have secured 
for this class of labourers, as great and often greater exemption from 
an invasion of their integrity and peace, than exists in those coun- 
tries where the exigencies of poverty alone produce such conse- 
quences. 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



101 



condition of servants. The provision for their remunera- 
tion should secure for them comfortable lodging and 
clothing, and sufficient wholesome food. This is the 
average, when helpless children, the infirm, the feeble, 
and the aged are comprehended with the able efficient 
labourers, as a class, to which as such they are entitled. 
In reaching this average we are also to take into view a 
proper consideration of the burdens and casualties of the 
service, and the value of the aid which masters give to 
render the labour of servants more productive. Servants 
should also be allowed every innocent gratification -and 
suitable recreation, compatible with that steady and mild 
exercise of the master's authority, which is necessary to 
promote the welfare and happiness of both parties. Con- 
scientious masters will carefully look after the health of 
their servants, not only by securing for them when sick 
all requisite medical aid and nursing, but also by restrain- 
ing them from habits injurious to health, and providing 
for them in all seasons of infirmity and helplessness, 
whether of early life or declining age. 

3. Under the obligations of the Scripture precept, "to 
forbear threatening," masters are bound to* a humane 
and considerate regard for servants. Thus they should 
not address them in angry and harsh terms, using sneers, 
gibes, and taunts, or expressing unkind and uncharitable 
suspicions of their integrity and fidelity. They should 
not make rigorous exactions of service, but appoint a 
reasonable task, prevent needless exposures to inclement 
weather or liability to the necessity for any undue or 
unreasonable exertion, and give a candid consideration 
to excuses for delinquencies and imperfections. 
9* 



102 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



Kindness and gentleness may be mingled with firmness 
in all gove^ ments, and punishment of whatever nature 
is always more efficient when administered with calmness, 
and under an evident sense of performing, conscientiously, 
a painful but necessary duty. The obdurate and in- 
tractable are thus more readily subdued than by threats 
and bursts of passion, or sudden and angry inflictions of 
any kind of punishment. Sympathy, compassion, and 
protecting care will solace the suffering, make tranquil 
the slumber, and contented the spirit of the humblest ser- 
vant, and, while acts of a Christian temper pleasing to 
God, will produce a blessing to the master himself. 

4. The condition of servants, being, for the most part, 
one of poverty, dependence, and ignorance, they are ex- 
posed to many evils through the ill will of others, or their 
own imprudence and improvidence. Against such it is 
the duty of masters to fortify them by all proper means. 
They should warn them against the artifices of those who 
would take advantage of their peculiar condition, by de- 
frauding them of their rights, in their petty commerce, or 
by inveigling them into vicious practices, or who would 
injure their" characters or persons by defamation or vio- 
lence. They should protect females from insult and de- 
gradation, and both sexes from undeserved accusations and 
punishments. They should also endeavour to train them 
to habits of neatness, care, and economy. Their position 
tends to render them thoughtless and improvident. They 
are not only in danger of regarding exemption from la- 
bour as the highest happiness, thence indulging in idleness 
whenever they have an opportunity, but they are peculi- 
arly liable to make foolish outlays of money for present 



FAMILY RELTGION. 



103 



gratification, regardless of the future. It is one of the 
frequent incidents of their condition in life, to look for- 
ward for provision against the wants of age, to some 
source out of themselves. Masters, who regard the best 
interests of those who serve them, will endeavour to over- 
come these propensities which enure to their ultimate un- 
happiness. 

5. It is the duty of masters to exercise a watchful care 
over the moral and religious interests of those placed 
under their control. They should earnestly warn them 
against the evils of intemperance, and the vices which 
prevail so often among persons of the labouring classes. 
They ought to urge all, and require the younger, to use 
the appointed means for their religious culture. So far 
as possible, let them personally instruct them, whether 
by set lessons of some systematic form of religious teach- 
ing, or by conversation, in the doctrines and duties of 
religion ; and set them a pious and godly example, im- 
press them with a proper sense of their responsibility to 
God, and by every possible mode show them that they 
are equally concerned that their servants should perform 
their duties to God, as to those who rule over them in 
this world. 

To the faithful performance of the duties now ex- 
pounded, many incentives may be addressed to masters. 

(1.) They should feel urged by a proper consideration 
of the station and circumstances of those under their 
control. Servants are relatively poor. Over the poor, 
the Scriptures teach us, God extends a peculiar care. 
Benevolence to such is a duty to him, which he will not 
fail to reward, (Lev. xix. 10. Deut. xv. 11. Ps. xli. 1. 



104 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



Prov. xiv. 21,) while their oppressors are the objects of 
his holy indignation. Is. iii. 14, 15 : x. 1, 2. Prov. xxii. 
16. Ps. lxxxii. 1-4. Our blessed Lord " became poor" 
and "took on him the form of a servant." Phil. ii. 7. 
2 Cor. viii. 9. He thus honoured poverty, and by his 
sympathy -with the poor and his tender kindness to them, 
left us an example for our imitation, in the exercise of 
that pity and gentleness, for which poverty appeals to a 
Christian heart. There is also a peculiar power in 
the touching appeal, "Behold, I am thy servant!" 
which may be considered as addressed to the master, 
by one who is dependent on his care, whose services 
have enured to his advantage,, who has perhaps watched 
over his infancy and childhood, ministered to him in 
sickness, and shared the sorrows of his bereavements 
and afflictions. 

2. The general Christian duty to the ignorant and 
unenlightened in the truth, which " makes wise to salva- 
tion," is specially obligatory on the master. While 
called to " do good unto all men," as he "has opportu- 
nity," (Gal. vi. 10,) he should feel incited to labour for 
the spiritual benefit of his servants, both by his abun- 
dant opportunities and their great need. He has con- 
trol of their time, and can secure for them privileges 
which, left to themselves, they would neither ask nor 
seek. They are ignorant, and by the necessity under 
which they are placed to be continually engaged in la- 
bour, are often deprived of many religious privileges, 
which others enjoy, even if desiring them. They are 
credulous, easily misled and exposed to sore trials of 
principle. Like all other human beings, they will have 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



105 



some religion. This reflection is specially worthy of at- 
tention, when it is borne in mind, that servants exert a 
great influence on the youth of the family, as nurses and 
companions of their childhood. Not only therefore, the 
spiritual well-being of the servants, but the interests of 
the master, whose prosperity and happiness is connected 
with their moral character, the principles and conduct 
of his children, the peace, order, and well-being of the 
family and of society, conspire in urging on him the duty 
of providing for them instruction, and training in the 
truths of revealed religion ; the system of faith which 
alone teaches man how to live well and to die happy — alone 
fits for the duties of time and the destinies of eternity. 

3. Let masters remember that " they have a Master 
in heaven ;" neither is there respect of persons with him. 
Eph. vi. 9. Before his bar, all must appear, divested 
of all the authority of earthly relations, and held to a 
strict account for the " deeds done in the body." Happy 
will those be, who can there meet servants, eternally 
blessed by their agency, and present them as crowns of 
their rejoicing for ever. 

II. Servants* are subjected by the apostle to the 

* The Greek word Mv\o s , translated servant, has the more specific 
sense of slave. Such is evinced by its etymology, being a derivation 
of A£w to bind, and by its opposition to e\ev6epo s , free. Eph. vi. 8. 
1 Cor. xii. 13. Rev. xiii. 16, &c. The best Lexicons, such as Wahl, 
( Robinson's translation,) Bretschneider, Passow, Liddel and Scott, and 
the leading commentators, Poole, Scott, Macknight, Olshausen, Eadie, 
and Hodge, all sustain this view. Even when used in a figurative 
sense, the word expresses the idea of stringent obligation or devoted 
service, as may be seen by its use to denote the relations of Christians 
to the Saviour. Rom. i. 1. Phil. i. 1. Acts xvi. 17, &c. 



106 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



same great law of obedience under which children are 
placed, and the nature and limitations of that obedience 
are substantially the same. They are exhorted to " do ser- 
vice as unto God and not man," " with fear and trembling/' 
or an anxious solicitude to please him, "in singleness of 
heart," or sincerely, "as the servants of Christ," (Eph. vi. 
5-9,) and "to please their masters well in all things, * * 
that they may adorn the doctrine of God our Saviour." 
Tit. ii. 9, 10. Obedience to "their own masters" is a 
part of the duty they owe to their " Master in heaven 
and yet while due "in all things," the most abject can- 
not be scripturally required to violate the dictates of an 
enlightened conscience, since the duty to his "master 
according to the flesh" is limited as well as defined by 
his duty to God, to which such a violation would be op- 
posed. 

During the apostolic age, and in those countries of 
which the early Christians were residents, servants were 
peculiarly liable to those temptations to disobedience 
and that neglect of duty, which are always incidental to 
their condition. The instructions and admonitions of 
the inspired writers are well adapted to such a state of 
things. 

(1.) Servants are exhorted to sincerity and honesty 
in their deportment. " Singleness of heart" is opposed 
to all duplicity or hypocrisy, such as those evince, who 
make an appearance of labour while loitering, or who 

We prefer in this discussion, and with this explanation, to retain 
the more general term servant, as our Bible translators have done ; 
which denotes the condition of all, whether in bondage or freedom, 
who are subject to the control of others. 



FAKILY KELIGION. 



107 



promise readily and perform lazily, or do not perform at 
all. It is also opposed to " eye-service," which a mere 
fear of punishment, as only desiring " to please men," 
to their own advantage, might produce. 

(2.) " Not purloining but showing all good fidelity." 
Tit. ii. 10. Purloining or "keeping back," as the word 
here used is elsewhere rendered, (Acts v. 2,) is a vice 
to which some servants are peculiarly addicted, under a 
false principle of morals, that while honest in their rela- 
tions to others, they may appropriate to themselves the 
property of their masters, which may be the fruit of their 
own labours. Indeed, all the vices forbidden in the 
eighth commandment are incidental to poverty. Prov. 
xxx. 9. But the apostle admonishes servants that such 
conduct is a breach of "good fidelity," which itself is 
eminently the result of a conscientious Christian obedience. 
This fidelity also requires that servants avoid wilfully or 
carelessly destroying, injuring, or wasting their master's 
property, or permitting others to do so, if it is in their 
power efficiently to interfere ; and as their reasonable ap- 
pointed labour is part of such property, they are bound 
to the profitable employment of their time. The vices 
to which sincerity and fidelity are thus opposed, are those 
to which all servants are, more or less, inclined. They 
do not appreciate, if they always rightly comprehend, 
the connection of interest which may exist between their 
masters and themselves, and cannot, by any reasoning, 
either specious or sound, be induced properly to appre- 
hend the duty of care, diligence, and honesty in a service, 
which they regard as enuring only to another's benefit. 
It is only on the principle of Christian obedience, that 



7 



108 FAMILY KELiaiON 

faithfulness in these particulars can be efficiently incul- 
cated. 

( 3.) Servants are exhorted to " count their own mas- 
ters worthy of all honour," and to avoid despising them, 
especially if "believers." 1 Tim. vi. 1, 2. Though as 
opposed by "doing them service," the word, "honour," 
may Jiere mean obedience ; yet as already explained, it 
may be taken in the wider sense of reverence, or that 
mingled fear and love, which secures obedience as well 
to the known or implied wishes of the master, as to his 
explicit commands. It implies respect for the person 
of the master, and a polite and deferential demeanour 
towards him. It is opposed to "answering again," 
( Tit. ii. 9,) and to all that sullen, ill-concealed reluctance, 
which marks an obedience only compulsory in its cause, 
and selfish in its ends. 

(4.) Patience and submission under merited chastise- 
ment, is urged by the apostle, ( 1 Pet. ii. 18-20,) when 
he reminds servants, that the only "glory" of "being 
buffeted," is in being "buffeted wrongfully." Those 
who do wrong and suffer for it, cannot prefer a claim to 
be the victims of persecution for conscience toward God. 
Hence, obedience is urged, not only to the "gentle," 
who may not be disposed to adopt harsh measures to en- 
force it, but also to the "froward," who will be ready to 
use them. 

We are interested to notice how the sacred writers 
have uniformly enforced every suggestion of duty by an 
allusion to Christian obligation. The fear of God and 
relation to the Lord Jesus Christ, (1 Cor. iii. 22-24,) 
at once indicate the disposition and the motive to duty. 



"family,, religion. 



109 



A regard for the name and doctrine of God, (1 Tim. 
vi. 1, 2. Tit. ii. 9,) and a desire to honour him in the 
persons of his believing children, are adduced as incen- 
tives to Christian honesty and humility ; and the rewards 
of the inheritance, to be meted out in the great day ac- 
cording to what every man doeth, whether " he be bond 
or free," (Eph. vi. 8. Col. iii. 24,) are held forth to 
stimulate the servant to zeal, diligence, and a conscien- 
tious performance of the most trying, and often the most 
thankless offices which men are ever called on to render 
for the benefit of others. Let not the humblest Christian 
servant be discouraged. Though poor and despised of 
men, let him remember that the Lord of glory honoured 
poverty and servitude by becoming poor, and taking " on 
him the form of a servant," and he too was "despised 
of men." Let him then seek to walk in the steps of 
Christ, and by patient continuance in well-doing put to 
silence the ignorance of foolish men. His toils and hard- 
ships may wear down his vigour, and the ingratitude and 
wickedness of the cruel, drink up his spirits ; but he is 
not degraded. The great Master has reached down the 
hand of his mercy, spoken peace to his heart, made him a 
freed man of Christ Jesus, and thus given him hopes 
which survive all earth's sorrows, a freedom which no 
shackles can diminish, and a nobility which no earthly 
potentate can confer. Nor is it to be forgotten, that 
even in this world, such secure the confidence, respect, 
and love of their masters, and of all wise and good men. 
Let those who have "believing masters," aim rightly to 
improve the spiritual advantages they possess. 

Were masters and servants imbued with the true spirit 



110 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



of the gospel, no part of the family constitution would 
more strikingly illustrate the beneficent influences of 
Christian principle, because, in no part does our depraved 
human nature find more frequent or influential occasions 
for the manifestation of its worst passions, and the 
greater the obstacles, the more glorious the achievement. 
Let masters earnestly address themselves to their duties, 
and servants with humility and docility accept the in- 
structions of the word of God, and then the evils which 
a rash philanthropy would remove, at the risk of indu- 
cing far worse, would be gradually subdued before the 
purifying and ennobling power of Christian principle. 
All earthly relations will soon terminate. Masters and 
servants who may have lived on earth in the performance 
of their respective duties, under the influence of Chris- 
tian motives, will soon rejoice together, as heirs of the 
common grace of a common Father, when the toils and 
temptations, and the anxieties and griefs of time shall 
have been forgotten, amidst the ever growing glories of 
the redeemed servants of Christ in heaven. 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



Ill 



CHAPTER III. 

THE BEST MEANS TO SECURE THE ENDS DESIGNED BY 
THE FAMILY CONSTITUTION. 

If the several members of a household perform their 
duties, as perfectly as is consistent with that moral in- 
firmity which pertains to man's best services, we are 
persuaded that the family will be a nursery of sound 
morality, useful knowledge, and true piety. In such a 
household, love, peace, and order will reign ; and, " so 
far as it shall be for God's glory," and the good of its 
members, health and plenty will abound. Those in- 
mates of the house who are of mature age, will be the 
most reliable elements of a prosperous state and an effi- 
cient church ; and those growing up under their influence, 
will be prepared to take their places, and transmit to 
others, after them, the benefits of this wisely ordained 
institution for promoting man's present and future welfare. 

That the family constitution is not always productive 
of such results is, alas ! too true. But such failures are 
not ascribable to a defect in that constitution. They 
are due, either to ignorance or neglect of the means by 
which, in the providence of God, the duties essential to 
success may be properly performed. In speaking of the 
nature of the family constitution and the duties of pa- 



112 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



rents on whom its character and efficiency mainly depend, 
we have had frequent occasion for adverting to the es- 
sential connection between the proper government and 
instruction of children, and the successful operation of 
the family constitution. The means, therefore, by which 
children are rightly educated, are those of leading im- 
portance to secure the ends designed by this organi- 
zation. 

Sec. I. Family Government. 

A well ordered family government is not only a most 
valuable means for the purpose in view, but sustains 
such an intimate relation to all other means, that without 
it, their efficiency is greatly impaired. The memorably 
disastrous failure of Eli in his parental duties, to which 
we have before referred, was owing to an inefficient gov- 
ernment. We learn that he instructed and warned his 
sons, but " he restrained them not." We are warranted 
in supposing, that his sons had been carefully instructed 
in the truths of revealed religion, but their neglect of 
duty and indulgence of sinful passions had made them 
vile, and, with all their advantages of knowledge and 
privilege of position, finally wrought their ruin. There 
may be still found but too many illustrations of Eli's 
faults. Such give countenance to the frequent allega- 
tion that the children of the pious derive no benefit from 
a religious education. But whenever such an allegation 
is made in respect to any special case, let the inquiry 
be also made, whether there has not been a repetition 
of Eli's mournful fault. There may be a right govern- 
ment connected with a defective course of teaching, so 
far as such an incongruity is practicable, and then also 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



113 



will there be deplorable results. But this fault occurs 
less frequently. 

1. As obedience is the fundamental principle of all filial 
duties, so the requisition of obedience is the prime ele- 
ment in the exercise of parental authority. At the 
earliest practicable period of a child's life, a training to 
prompt, implicit obedience should begin. This period is 
earlier than many suppose. Even the infant, yet hang- 
ing on the mother's breast, may be taught to submit to 
her will. If the habit of obedience be fixed in early 
childhood, the task of the parent in governing, and that 
of the child in obeying, will daily become easier. But 
the longer parents neglect laying this foundation, the 
greater will be the difficulty of establishing authority and 
conducting that government, which depends on its estab- 
lishment. 

Said the mother of John and Charles Wesley, "The 
first step to form the mind of a child, is to conquer its 
will. When once subdued, then many indulgences can 
be safely granted." 

Said the guilty Webster, when about to die for the fa- 
tal blow he dealt poor Parkman — not in malice but in 
rage — " In early childhood, mine was a quick and off- 
handed temper, which was never subdued. I was a petted 
and indulged child, and all this is the end of it." Re- 
straints are necessary for the young. 

Commands and prohibitions should not be too much mul- 
tiplied, lest by forgetfulness or a weariness in securing 
compliance with many minute requisitions, the inatten- 
tion of parents produce carelessness in children. To 
avoid a similar evil, parents should beware of hasty or 
10* 



114 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



capricious orders, now sternly requiring a duty, or pro- 
hibiting an indulgence, and then, with no sound reason 
for the change, readily remitting all exercise of authority. 
It is of great importance, that parents embrace opportu- 
nities of giving practical lessons on the connection be- 
tween obedience and happiness. They may, without de- 
scending to a coaxing process, impress the minds of 
children with this truth, by requiring their obedience in 
things, which call for little or no self-denial, but to which 
they are not specially predisposed, and then gradually 
advancing in the nature of their demands, till their chil- 
dren begin to feel, that, at whatever present inconvenience 
to themselves, obedience to their parents ultimately se- 
cures their own happiness. It will greatly aid in this 
work, if parents will always be careful to impress the 
minds of children with the conviction that they are their 
best friends, and most earnestly desire their happiness. 
They should condescend to take part in promoting their 
innocent enjoyments, by affording them proper means of 
amusement. It is one thing to gratify all the whims 
and caprices of children, and another to gratify what is 
reasonable ; injudicious parents often act as if they re- 
garded the amusements of their children as utterly un- 
worthy of their notice, and some seem to delight in need- 
lessly abridging them, interfering with their plays fey un- 
seasonable and often unreasonable requisitions to some 
annoying and, it may be, useless engagement. In both 
cases, there is danger that children will associate obedi- 
ence and unhappiness, and will be tempted to more dili- 
gence in devising excuses than in performing duty. 
Those, on the other hand, who find parents always ready 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



115 



to grant proper gratifications, and studious to promote their 
welfare, even in requiring the performance of duty, will 
be led to the exercise of that confidence in their parents' 
wise regard for their interests, which, as they increase in 
years, will become the efiicient cause of a prompt, cheer- 
ful, and implicit obedience. We hardly need add, that 
unlimited indulgence is utterly inconsistent with any 
training to obedience. 

Acts of disobedience should never pass unnoticed. In 
every test to which the child is subjected, the parent 
should be clearly the conqueror. By this course, such 
tests will become more and more infrequent. Above all, 
let parents, at the earliest period of the child's dawning in- 
telligence, impress its mind with the higher obligation 
to obey God, and endeavour to fix the conviction, that 
the obedience to the parent is subordinate to that due 
to a heavenly Father. Children are capable of appre- 
ciating the force of such an obligation in very early life, 
and when deeply fixed, it becomes a surer principle of 
filial obedience, than any consideration growing out of 
the parental relation or the obligations of gratitude ; 
while it is also a foundation for a system of religious 
teaching. Indeed all those systems of securing obedience 
by hiring children, by means of some indulgence or grati- 
fication of appetite, or extravagant rewards in money 
or other valuables, are of doubtful propriety, in view of 
the evi]s which the rewards often entail on them, and 
ought to be utterly discountenanced, as unavailable to 
any right training to the duty of a true filial obedience. 

2. Kindred in nature, and one of the first fruits of a 
training to obedience, is a training of children to habits 



116 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



of self-denial. Its earliest lessons are gained by obey- 
ing, for every act of obedience which requires of the 
child the "repression of his own desires, or a disappoint- 
ment in his own plans, is also an act of self-denial. The 
restriction of appetite, denial of coveted toys, the pro- 
hibition from some kinds of sport, and the requisition to 
some conflicting duty, will be suggestive of the nature of 
such training. But here too there should be caution, 
lest by enforcing self-denial, without securing by its ex- 
ercise some benefit to themselves or others, children 
should be led to look on all such requisitions as rather 
the acts of an arbitrary tyranny, than of desire for their 
good. When, however, they perceive clearly a mani- 
festation of such a desire, and find that self-denial, though 
often a painful duty, may become a pleasing one, in view 
of the proposed results, they will become ready for the 
practice of this important element, in a wise training for 
the stern realities of life. 

3. The judicious use of rewards and punishments is a 
subject of great difficulty in all plans for the government 
of the young. We cannot consent, with the Scriptures 
as our authoritative guide, to give place for a moment 
to the suggestion, that children are to be controlled by 
mere moral suasion. It is true, that as they develop 
the reasoning faculties, they should be treated as rational 
beings. It will indeed be a healthful exercise, to require 
them, on suitable occasions, to practise the simpler pro- 
cesses of reasoning, and accustom themselves to rely on 
their own judgments in matters of less moment. But 
passion and inclination, even after reason asserts her 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



117 



claim to be heard, are often too impetuous to be restrained 
by her yet feeble authority. 

God has sanctioned an appeal to the hope of rewards 
and the fear of punishment, as motives of conduct ; and 
the proper exercise of reason is not so much in teach- 
ing what is right, as in directing us to a proper apprecia- 
tion of the rewards of well-doing, and the penalties of 
evil-doing. Now, at any age, but especially when very 
young, children are almost daily called to submit to 
regulations, the propriety of which they cannot under- 
stand. It would be vain to hope, that by mere explana- 
tion and persuasion, the ignorant child can be induced 
to receive the nauseating drug, or be restrained from 
imprudent indulgence in improper food. The rewards 
which good conduct produces, as legitimate fruits, may 
be supplemented by promises of special favours as ad- 
ditional encouragements to obedience. But such should 
not be offered as a hire or as the sole incentives. As 
the good which follows well-doing is contrasted with the 
evil which follows ill-doing, so these promised favours 
may be offsets of special threatenings. Parents should 
always scrupulously fulfil such promises of reward. Care 
should, meanwhile, be used to train children to regard 
obedience as right, and that it should not be rendered 
merely to obtain a reward or avoid an evil. Rewards 
and punishments are means, not ends, of virtue. 

To secure the good effects of punishments they should 
be most faithfully inflicted. It is more important that 
they be certain than severe. Indeed the severity is a 
matter of discretion, in which parents must consider the 
age, temper, temptations, and advantages of the child, 



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and the nature and alleviations or aggravations of the 
offence. There is a large class of punishments to which 
none should ever resort : such as shutting up children in 
dark closets, starving them to submission, wounding their 
feelings by gibes and sneers, or abuse, and striking 
them with the hand. The Bible is a book of eminent 
practical wisdom. It makes no mention of these modes 
of punishment. But it frequently urges the importance 
of a discreet use of the "rod of correction," by which 
the " foolishness" or wickedness "bound in the heart of 
a child" may be driven out. Prov. xxii. 15. " The rod 
and reproof give wisdom," and "he that spareth his rod 
hateth his son." Prov. xxiii. 14; xiii. 24. The use of 
the rod does not imply a needless severity. Indeed, the 
wisdom of this " Divine ordinance," as it has been called, 
is manifested in the selection of an instrument, by which 
the measure of severity may be judiciously modified. 
Objections to its use on the ground of the degradation 
which it imposes, with the pain inflicted, will apply equally 
to all species of punishment. In fact, the degradation 
is rather in the ill-desert, than the punishment which is 
incurred. Many parents make the sad but candid con- 
fession, that they cannot punish, except when in an 
angry mood ! This is much to be deplored. Such pun- 
ishment as anger inflicts, is seldom judicious in time, de- 
gree, or method. The use of any instrument is then lia- 
ble to be excessive. Haste and passion may involve the 
parent in that great guilt of punishing the innocent, and 
a resort to blows with the hand may be followed by 
painful consequences for life. Nothing more weakens 
discipline than for parents to make a false charge, and 



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119 



inflict undeserved punishment. The child's sense of jus- 
tice will be wounded, and the sting will long remain. 
Proper and deserved punishment will fail in producing 
its appropriate effect, and the parent himself will, per- 
haps, under the reacting impulses of his feelings, become 
as unduly lax as he had been unduly rigorous. 

Corporal punishment should not be used on slight 
grounds, nor be frequently called into requisition. We 
have often thought that it would be well, if some one, as 
much superior to parents, in size and wisdom, as they 
are to their children, would be appointed to administer 
to these hasty, passionate disciplinarians some chastise- 
ment, similar in degree and method, to those which they 
visit upon their offspring. 

The Apostle directs that parents bring up their 
children "in the nurture and admonition of the Lord." 
Eph. vi. 4. By admonition, we understand the whole pro- 
cess of correcting, by words and acts, the faults, or enforc- 
ing the duties of children. Now this is such as the Lord 
directs. It is a Christian duty. It should be pervaded with 
Christian principle, and administered in a Christian man- 
ner, and for Christian purposes. The best conducted 
school we ever knew was that of a gentleman, who always 
preceded the chastisement of a pupil by a season of 
prayer "for him and with him." This deliberate and 
solemn procedure, savoured, as it would be, with pa- 
rental tenderness and affection, would effect more to re- 
claim the erring and stimulate the sluggish, than scores 
of hasty, angry, and severe beatings with the rod of cor- 
rection. 

4. Not only ought the age, temper, and general char- 



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acter of the child affect the degree of corporal punishment, 
but should influence the parent in every process of dis- 
cipline. A word of reproof or even a look, will often 
effect for one, what the rod will be requisite to produce in 
the conduct of another. Quick and irascible, but easily 
subdued tempers need more frequent, though milder 
methods of discipline, than those of a more impassive but 
stubborn nature. On one, encouragement is more effica- 
cious than disapprobation. The frown which almost 
breaks the heart of one little culprit, will be returned, by 
a more resolute and refractory child, with pouts and in- 
solence. In this connection, we may add, that careful 
training should be used, to lead all children to act on 
principle, instead of impulse. For the frequently recur- 
ring exigencies of life, which call for prompt decision and 
energetic effort, it is highly important, that youth should be 
habituated to act, not on the mere suggestions of a passing 
emotion, but on the well defined purposes of a clear sense 
of duty, and a firm determination to do what is right, 
under all circumstances of hazard and temptation. 

5. We add a summary of what we believe useful hints 
on family government, but on which we cannot en- 
large. 

Those who govern others should learn to govern their 
thoughts, temper, words, and actions ; to be slow to speak, 
and speak slowly. 

They should be mild but firm, patient with the faults 
of those under them ; should sympathize with them in 
sorrow, be helpers of their joy, and set an example of 
forbearance, self-denial, and forgiveness, 

Parents should never allow their children to be away 



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from home at night, without knowing where they are, and 
how employed. 

Finally, all the members of a family should be trained 
to punctuality, promptness, and regularity in business, 
moderation in enjoyment, and patience in adversity. 

Sec. II. Physical Education. 

We have already had occasion to advert to the impor- 
tance of physical training, as a part of the education, by 
which children are fitted for their place in society ; and 
it is fully entitled to our consideration, as one of the 
means by which the design of the family constitution 
may be secured. 

Such a training is effected as much, or more, by the use 
of preventives than by any course of art or scheme for 
bodily exercise. Perhaps more injury has resulted from 
some of the patented devices of modern times, in respect 
to the care of children, youth, and adults, than from even 
a culpable negligence, which has not provided against 
the evils to which all are exposed. 

1. Fresh air and convenient access to a supply of good 
water are essential requisites for a healthy residence. 
Those are easily had in rural situations, and no less de- 
sirable, though difficult to be obtained, in cities. A fa- 
mily residence ought to be sheltered from bleak winds, 
and the yard provided with shade trees, whether merely 
ornamental or productive of fruit. Besides the obvious 
advantages of such a locality on the score of health, 
there is a good moral effect produced by the pleasing 
associations which will gather about such a place. The 
rooms, especially such as are used for sleeping, should 
be airy, and well ventilated. By a proper care of all 
11 



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the offices of a domestic establishment, such as cellars, 
dairies, kitchens, and stables, the decomposition of sub- 
stances which engender foul air should be prevented. 
The neatness of such premises, combined with other cir- 
cumstances, produces the additional advantage of pro- 
moting the personal neatness of the members of a 
family. 

2. Much more of the health as well as comfort of chil- 
dren, and, indeed, of all the inmates of a house, depends 
on the cook, than on the costliness, variety, and richness 
of the materials used for food. The quality and sound- 
ness of meats and vegetables should be carefully inspec- 
ted, but the process by which they are prepared for the 
table is of equal moment. Dyspepsia, derangements of 
the liver, and a long train of distressing nervous ailments, 
which seriously affect the state of both mind and heart, 
may be traced to the use of improper food. True, in 
many cases the injury results from food too highly sea- 
soned or too much enriched by the aid of unhealthy con- 
diments. Still, bad cooking — especially of bread — is a 
prolific source of evil. Children are oftener the victims 
of unhealthy food than adults ; and while it is the duty 
of parents, as already inculcated, to prevent their indis- 
creet use of confections and richly prepared food, every 
care should be used to provide them with a simple and 
wholesome diet. Many a cross temper has been in- 
creased, if not occasioned, by sour, indigestible bread ; 
and sometimes the punishment inflicted on a little child, 
would be more properly visited on the careless cook, or 
the yet more careless nurse or mamma. We are well 
aware that all the attention which is desirable, cannot be 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



123 



given, by many families, to these and similar sanatory 
regulations. Still the poorest in rural places can secure 
neatness, good cooking, and fresh air; and even in crowded 
cities, with but few exceptions, all who have homes, 
could effect far more than many such do, were they to 
divert some of their expenditure for useless and injurious 
indulgences, to the valuable purposes suggested in our 
remarks. 

3. The natural disposition of children to take food 
frequently, though in small quantities at a time, which 
some consider a species of amusement, ought to be pro- 
perly encouraged. They should have a taste for a 
healthy, nourishing diet cultivated, and not be permitted 
to use painted candies, richly seasoned cakes, and stimu- 
lating drinks, to lay the foundation for lives of pain 
and premature death. 

4. Children should be encouraged to follow the dictates 
of nature, by being permitted great freedom of out-door 
exercise. Let their bodies be duly protected by com- 
fortably fitting clothing, avoiding too much wrapping, 
which will induce undue tenderness, but equally shun- 
ning the other extreme of incautiously exposing their 
yet tender frames, by the effort to "harden" them, — a 
process which has often hardened the little victims of 
quackery into corpses. The soiling of clothes or even of 
the skin is a small matter compared with the advantages 
of constitutions early invigorated. A free use of clean 
water will easily repair the damage to the body, and is 
a cheaper and healthier operation than the use of medi- 
cine to repair an enfeebled system. Still children should 
be trained to cultivate true personal neatness, and to 



124 



FAMILY KELIGION. 



avoid slovenliness of dress. Neatness and morality are 
nearly akin. 

Let parents accustom children to habits of early rising. 
Sound refreshing sleep is ordinarily best procured by the 
use of mattresses, — and in order that children should have 
enough sleep, they should be required to retire early. 
They need more than adults. It is highly important 
that they go to bed in a cheerful humour. The foolish 
custom of keeping lights in their sleeping apartments, 
when in health, ought never to be countenanced. 

5. That children may have well developed bodies, 
they ought not to be subjected to early and protracted 
seasons of confinement in a school-room. Circumstan- 
ces so vary, that no uniform rule on this subject can be 
prescribed. Generally, however, the age of eight years 
is a sufficiently early period, at which to place them un- 
der the most moderate restraints of school-rooms. Even 
then, the hours of recreation should treble those of study. 
As children grow older, the garden, the farm, riding on 
horseback, or gunning will afford to boys proper oppor- 
tunities for exercise, both in useful labour and entertain- 
ing recreation ; while the cultivation of flowers, walks for 
the purposes of a practical study of botany, or the lighter 
services of domestic economy, will contribute to the 
health of girls. ' Town life, by its very nature, and much 
more by the tyranny of fashion, places many restrictions 
on the physical culture of both sexes. Still by a judi- 
cious use of such facilities as may be enjoyed by most 
residents in town, much healthier faces might be seen 
among the children of our cities. 

6. With all our care, children will sicken. They 



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125 



should be early trained to submit promptly to the use of 
all the usual methods of treating diseases to which they 
are specially liable. Though the remark may appear 
needlessly minute, it is a suggestion of great importance, 
that they ought to be taught at an early period, to show 
their tongues and throats. Many a child has been the 
victim of its own ignorant obstinacy and parental neglect, 
simply by hindering the physician from a satisfactory 
examination of these organs. They should be led to re- 
gard the doctor as a friend: and hence should not be 
threatened with him as one who will subject them to pain. 
Let them learn that medicine, though bitter, is useful, 
and be trained to proper habits of attention to the healthy 
condition of their organs of digestion. By watching the 
earliest appearances of disease, and using simple and appro- 
priate remedies, protracted and painful maladies, perma- 
nently seated ailments or early death, are often prevented. 
Parents should however be cautious, lest by the frequent 
use of violent remedies, or the injudicious administration 
of medicine, they foster, instead of preventing or healing 
disease. Both for adults and children, nature is a good 
physician, and the aid of doctors is oftener most valu- 
able, when their knowledge is employed to inform us that 
no medicine is needed. 

Sec. III. Mental education. 

The intellectual improvement of the members of a fa- 
mily conduces to the attainment of the purposes of its 
constitution. The degree to which mental culture should 
be carried must, of course, be determined by considera- 
tions, which it is foreign to our purpose to introduce. 
The circumstances of each family and of the several 
11* 



126 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



members of each, must exert a controlling influence in 
the matter. It is enough for us to offer a few general 
suggestions on the nature of this culture, and the methods 
by which in all ordinary cases it may be best secured. 

1. Though a knowledge of letters is of material aid in 
all processes of mental improvement, it is not essential. 
Very young children, before being subjected to a course 
of instruction in books, may be taught many valuable 
facts, and trained to habits of observation and reflection. 
The natural inquisitiveness of childhood should be en- 
couraged by gratification on all topics of useful know- 
ledge, which may be objects of their curiosity, and the 
explanation of which they can apprehend. It has been 
often said, that during the first five years of life, we learn 
far more than at any subsequent period. It does not fol- 
low, however, that such learning will always be either 
useful in itself, or contribute to a useful, mental, and 
moral progress in subsequent life. 

2. Hence, while the process of a mental education 
should begin with the earliest dawning of intelligence, 
great care should be used, then, and during all the years 
of childhood, to give a right exercise to the faculties of 
mind as they are developed. There is a great temptation 
to fond parents, to make their children prodigies. Often 
the memory of mere words is so cultivated, to the neglect 
of the reflecting powers, that, even in after life, the sub- 
ject of such a training continues sadly negligent in the 
use of such powers. A mechanical or drawling method 
of reading, acquired in childhood, may often be detected in 
the pulpit or at the bar ; and a defective pronunciation 
or habits of incorrect spelling, sometimes follow men, 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



127 



from the nursery and school-room, through life. The 
art of reading is the key to knowledge. But in order 
to its greatest utility, children should be so taught to read, 
that they will love the employment. We seldom find 
bad readers fond of reading, either to themselves, or to 
others. Some, from disuse, forget how to read. It is of 
very great importance then, that children should be 
trained, in early life, to a good elocution, in w T hich may 
be comprised correct pronunciation, emphasis, and 
modulation. For young ladies, good reading is a more 
valuable accomplishment than any or all of those more 
costly parts of female education, to which the term has 
been exclusively applied. Parents, whose own cultiva- 
tion of mind and leisure enable them to be guides, are, 
ordinarily, the best teachers of their children in these 
very elementary, but truly important parts of education. 
Such and all other, however, can contribute material^ 
to the culture of their children by securing for them the 
society of the intelligent and well educated, and prevent- 
ing their association with persons of the opposite char- 
acter. 

3. On the comparative advantages of an education at 
home or in boarding-schools, on which so much has been 
said and written, we can only offer a few general remarks. 
In earlier life, for both sexes, and during all the child- 
hood of girls, no influence can be substituted for that of a 
home of ordinary virtue and intelligence. But there are 
large numbers of families, who are prevented by circum- 
stances, which they cannot control, from giving their 
children a suitable education, unless they send them to 
boarding-schools. Girls who have been rightly reared 



128 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



under the parental roof, on passing the period of child- 
hood, may often derive valuable advantages to their men- 
tal culture, without detriment to their moral character, 
b.y a few years' attendance on well conducted schools, in 
which, by reason of the numbers collected, a full corps 
of teachers, and a complete scientific apparatus are pro- 
vided. Of course, a liberal education of boys can, in 
very rare cases, be obtained, without the facilities fur- 
nished by academies and colleges. We have long felt 
persuaded, that the objection urged against such institu- 
tions, on the score of demoralizing tendencies insepara- 
bly connected with their literary advantages, is unfoun- 
ded. It will be found, on careful examination, that more 
youth become hopefully pious, while members of our 
well conducted academies and colleges, than can be found 
in any other class of young men of similar age.* Let 
the appropriate work of the family be well done, and, 
ordinarily, public schools will be public blessings. 

4. Both sexes should be educated alike, through the 
period of childhood. Nor is it a disadvantage, should 
they, for the same period, be associated together in 
school. For girls, though not so essential as for boys, 
a liberal course in the languages and sciences is highly 
important, so far as it can be conducted, consistently 
with a training in those parts of domestic life peculiarly 
pertaining to their sex. But we are reminded that for 
a large portion of the families in our country, these sug- 
gestions are of no practical value. It should, however, 
be the object of all parents, to provide the best possible 
intellectual training for their children ; and those who 



* See Princeton Review. — Art. H. } January, 1859. 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



129 



cannot secure all the desired advantages, and are limited 
to the elementary process, required by our baptismal 
service, ( Directory, vii. 4,) may so direct the reading 
and associations of their children, that, as they grow up, 
they vrill find in improving and entertaining reading a 
great security against the temptations to sinful pleasures, 
will form tastes and habits of thinking which will be the 
means of self-culture, and will become more capable of 
appreciating the teachings of the pulpit as well as those 
of pious parents. From the ranks of such youth, have 
sprung many of the most eminent, self-educated men in 
all professions, and they furnish the great mass of intel- 
ligent, virtuous citizens for the State, and active mem- 
bers of the household of faith. 
Sec. IV. Religious Education. 

But no measure of intellectual culture, unaided by the 
sentiments of a true Christian faith, will suffice to secure 
the most important end designed by the family constitu- 
tion, the promotion of true piety. The necessity and 
methods of moral and Christian education, are presented 
to our attention by the Apostle's exhortation to parents, 
to "bring up" their "children, in (or by) the nurture 
of the Lord." Eph. vi. 4. By the word "nurture," 
may be understood the whole process of instruction and 
discipline. This must be such as the Lord prescribes, 
and the authority of his word must be continually brought 
to bear on the heart and conscience of the child. He 
must be presented as the Teacher and Ruler, to whose in- 
structions they must attend and to whose laws they must 
submit. In a word, the religious instruction by which 
the great purpose of the family constitution is to be at- 



130 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



tained, must be thoroughly Christian. It is not that de- 
rived from the law and light of nature, the precepts of 
philosophy or the deductions of science, but that which 
revealed religion imparts.* 

1. The Bible supplies lessons of religious instruction, 
peculiarly adapted to interest the attention, and impress 
the hearts of the young. By its brief, but graphic bio- 
graphies, they are presented with examples of faith in 
God, the advantages of uprightness, patience in adver- 
sity, integrity in temptation, meekness under insult, 
generosity to enemies, fidelity to friends, kindness to the 
afflicted, and justice to the oppressed. With these are 
contrasted examples of the evils of malice, jealousy, envy, 
avarice, hatred, lust, and revenge, the abuse of power, re- 
bellion against God, persecution of the good, and cruelty 
to the poor. We are thus invited to imitate the faith 
and patience of the pious, that we may inherit like bles- 
sings to theirs, and warned to escape the misery of those 
who opposed God's government, by avoiding their ini- 
quitous practices. The lessons of our Saviour's birth, 
childhood, life, teachings, sufferings, and death, provide 
the foundation of those doctrines of grace, which make 
wise to salvation. 

Now, these are methods of instruction which suit the 
ignorant, who always learn best by examples. They 
may fail to apprehend abstract propositions, which they 
readily grasp and more easily retain, when presented in 
the narrative of facts. They are also lessons which meet 
the ever recurring wants of daily family life. The moral 
of the biographical sketches of Cain and Abel, Joseph 

* See Dr. Hodge on Ephesians, vi. 4. 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



131 



and his brethren, Pharaoh and Moses, Samuel and Saul, 
David, Jonathan, Solomon, Josiah, Paul and Timothy, 
and above all of the blessed Saviour, may be used to 
repress evil, and encourage right feelings and actions. 
Thus we see that the Bible presents us the most phil- 
osophically correct method of teaching, by adapting its 
lessons to the young, so that, even before their minds 
can appreciate its abstract propositions, their hearts will 
be impressed with the truth which those propositions are 
meant to impart. 

2. To the more practical lessons of the Bible must be 
added the systematized compends of truth, contained in 
catechisms. The word catechism is of Greek origin, and 
denotes oral teaching. In Luke i. 4, the clause, " the 
things wherein thou hast been instructed," might be ren- 
dered "the things wherein thou hast been catechized," or 
orally taught. The reader can also compare (in the 
Greek) 1 Cor. xiv. 19, and Gal. vi. 6, for similar uses of the 
verb, Karr,xtco, from which this term is derived. In the 
history of the early church, it has been thought by some, 
that distinct traces of the existence of a special officer, 
who performed the functions of a catechist, may be found ; 
at all events, we know that the early Christian pastors 
performed this work, and during the most prosperous 
days of the church, we find it occupying the attention 
of the most zealous and faithful agents in propagating 
the gospel. All the Reformers, from WicklifFe to Knox, 
engaged in the preparation of suitable catechisms for 
the instruction of the children and youth. Our church 
is much blessed in possessing several of these useful 
compends. That for young children, itself a full and 



132 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



faithful summary of Christian doctrine, expressed in 
simple terms, is an excellent introduction to the Shorter 
Catechism, a work which can never be superseded, either 
in regard to the fulness, conciseness, or perspicuity of its 
teachings. It is a striking testimony to its value, that 
the Methodist church, which, of all evangelical denomi- 
nations, is the most strongly opposed to our system of 
doctrine, has adopted into its own catechism, either lit- 
erally or substantially, the whole of the answers of this 
"form of sound words," excepting only those few, that 
express doctrines to which this excellent body of Chris- 
tians has ever evinced a decided, and, we may add, strange 
opposition. The Larger Catechism is a fuller exposition 
of the truths which form the staple of the Shorter. 
Youth, carefully instructed by the proper use of these 
compends, will be well prepared in knowledge, and, by 
the Divine blessing, also in piety, for the position and 
work of the true followers of Christ. 

3. As children reach the period of youth, the Bible 
may become the subject of a more minute and extended 
study. Let them read it, in large portions at a sitting, 
and form analyses of what they peruse. Commencing 
with the historical parts, as they increase in powers of 
comprehension and expression, they may acquire capa- 
city for this useful mode of studying the Epistles. 
From early life, they should be trained to commit to 
memory, selections of Scripture, especially of the devo- 
tional writings, as the Psalms, and the practical parts of 
the Epistles, with some of our Lord's discourses, as the 
Sermon on the Mount, and his last address to his disci- 
ples. All should read a portion of Scripture daily, and 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



133 



adopt some method, such as that of reading three chap- 
ters daily, through the secular days of the week in the 
Old Testament, and five on every Sabbath in the New, 
by which the whole Bible will be annually perused. Re- 
ligious biography, expositions of Scripture and of the 
catechism, and some compend of church history, would 
constitute a course of useful religious reading. 

4. While the truths which make wise to salvation con- 
stitute the staple of that instruction, which is comprised 
in a proper method of moral improvement, there are 
many topics of common morality and some relating to 
what may be called the minor morals and good man- 
ners, which are by no means unworthy of attention. Pa- 
rents will find themselves sustained by the authority of 
God's word, in the lessons of truth, which they inculcate 
on their children's minds on these subjects. The great 
law in which our Saviour summed up the Commandments 
of the second table, " Thou shalt love thy neighbour as 
thyself," (Matt. xxii. 39,) or, "Whatsoever ye would 
that men should do to you, do ye even so to them," 
(Matt. vii. 12,) presents in a few words, the principles 
of justice, uprightness, honesty, generosity, and kindness. 
The vaunted polished manners of the ball-rooms and par- 
lours of wealth and rank, and " good society," are mere 
paintings, and often very imperfect, of that genuine po- 
liteness, which originates in a heart of a true Christian 
sympathy for others. Reverence for age, respect for 
superiors, courtesy to equals, and kindness to inferiors, 
are its genuine fruits, and all find illustrations in the 
inspired Scriptures. 
12 



134 



FAMILY KELIGION. 



Sec. Y. Infant Baptism. 

Our catechism teaches us that infant baptism is a 
means of grace, (Larg. Cat., Q. 154, 167,) and although 
an institution, pertaining more to the church, as such, 
than the family, yet for obvious reasons, most properly 
to be regarded as a means of promoting the purposes of 
the family constitution. The benefits of this ordinance 
are not restricted to the solemn prayers and exhortations 
connected with its administration. These are valuable 
adjuncts, and deserve the serious regard of parents and 
all baptized children. Those children to whom baptism 
is administered, on the faith of their parents, are in 
covenant relation with God, and enjoy a position of 
greater privilege and responsibility than others. For, 
to such, by means of parental faith, when properly exer- 
cised, there has been specially offered, an "ingrafting 
into Christ, remission of sins by his blood, regeneration 
by his Spirit, adoption and resurrection unto everlasting 
life." (Larg. Cat., Q. 165.) Now, while any Christian 
parent may and ought to feel the obligations of the pa- 
rental relation to " bring up" their " children in the nur- 
ture and admonition of the Lord," it is but reasonable 
to suppose that those who have offered them in baptism, 
with a proper apprehension of their duty and privilege, 
will specially feel such an obligation. If they have ex- 
ercised the faith called for by the tenor of the covenant 
of grace, God has been pleased, on his part, to offer to 
their children as to them, the blessings of that covenant. 
Such children then, as they reach years of discretion, 
though, as other descendants of Adam, " aliens from the 
commonwealth of Israel," are specially encouraged and 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



135 



invited to return to their allegiance. God, in offering 
these blessings, and thus urging them to accept his offers, 
provides, in connection with the ordinance of baptism, 
suitable means for securing their acceptance. The prayers 
of parents, of the church, and the pastor, and the labours 
of the latter for their conversion, will be more direct and 
frequent. They are also brought into a position more 
accessible to his labours ; and when their relation as 
members of the visible church by birth, under pledges to 
perform their part of the covenant of grace, in the exer- 
cise of faith, repentance, and new obedience, is properly 
impressed on their minds, we may reasonably hope, this 
"means of grace" will become truly " effectual for their 
salvation." 

Sec. VI. The Sabbath and the Sanctuary. 

The preaching of the Gospel and the proper observance 
of the Christian Sabbath, are properly to be regarded as 
valuable means for securing the benefits contemplated in 
the constitution of the family. These means are not only 
of utility to children, but to all the members of the 
household. The sacred quiet and rest of the Sabbath, 
the exemption from the ordinary duties of life, and the 
opportunity for spending seasons of special prayer, re- 
ligious meditation and reading, and praising God for his 
mercy and love, are peculiarly grateful to the Christian 
heart. Parents have then peculiarly favourable opportu- 
nities for religious conversation and prayer with their chil- 
dren. Fathers, who are hurried by the pressing engage- 
ments of the week, and mothers, careful and troubled 
about much serving in domestic occupations, are then at lei- 
sure to call to mind their defects in duty, to encourage and 



136 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



help each other in acts of penitence and faith, and en- 
deavours after new obedience, and to engage in the in- 
struction of those placed under them. Did the Sabbath 
afford man no other blessings, than the means which it 
furnishes for promoting the religious welfare of families, 
it would be well entitled to be called a day " made for 
man." The best Christians are liable to the influences 
of the engrossing cares and pleasures of life ; and this day 
is most eminently adapted to break the power of the 
world over our affections, and as well by its appointed 
duties, as its appointed rest from other duties, to call 
our thoughts to heavenly things. All its holy hours, 
except those spent in the public worship of God, should 
be so employed, as to promote the spiritual welfare of all 
the members of the family. An agreeable variety of 
duty may be imposed on younger children so that they 
may not be unduly wearied. The afternoon especially, ac- 
cording to the useful custom of our ecclesiastical ancestors, 
ought to be religiously set apart for the instruction of 
children and servants. The older children may be em- 
ployed to a judicious extent, in this duty, much to their 
own profit. Our Directory for worship concisely and yet 
fully instructs us in the proper use of this important means ; 
and we refer our readers to its excellent suggestions, as 
supplying any omissions in these cursory hints. Direc- 
tory for Worship, ch. I. 

The public preaching of the Gospel is God's appointed 
means " of convincing and converting sinners, and build- 
ing them up in holiness and comfort, through faith unto 
salvation." It is much to be lamented, that so many 
families, in our highly favoured land, are, in a great 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



137 



measure, deprived of this means, or enjoy it but rarely ; 
and that others are dependent to a great extent, for the 
instructions of the pulpit, on those who cannot preach in 
an edifying manner, or who occupy the hours of God's 
holy time, in ill-natured, puerile, controversial harangues, 
or in fanatical ravings on topics unconnected with the 
glorious grace of the Gospel. Those however, who enjoy 
the stated ministrations of intelligent and pious men, 
will find in such, instructions suited to the case of all the 
members of the family. Not only may all these be 
taught the way of salvation through Christ Jesus, but 
each may be reminded of his special duties, instructed 
how to meet the trials and temptations which beset his 
path, and admonished, warned, encouraged, and cheered 
in the ways of true godliness, so that while aided to be a 
better member of the family, he may also be a better 
subject of Christ Jesus. 

All the inmates of the household should attend church. 
If it is necessary that any should be detained at home, a 
rotation in this duty can be observed. Even very young 
children should be early trained to go up to the house of 
God. If too young to receive appreciable benefit by the 
teachings of the pulpit, they will form habits of respect 
and reverence for sacred things. The solemn quiet and 
order of a Christian assembly, the public prayer of ador- 
ation, thanksgiving, confession, supplication, and interces- 
sion, the notes of cheerful praise, and the exposition and 
enforcement of the great doctrines of God's word, with 
the more specially tender solemnities of the sacraments 
of Baptism and the Lord's supper, are well calculated to 

produce on the wakening minds of children, valuable im- 
12* 



138 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



pressions. Thus if no direct saving knowedge is received, 
as they grow up their hearts and consciences will be so 
affected, that their naturally depraved tendencies will be 
checked, and the way be prepared for the effectual call of 
the Holy Spirit. 

We greatly fear, that there is a tendency in some 
minds to depreciate the ordinary services of the sanc- 
tuary, and to associate hopes for the conversion of souls, 
only with seasons of unwonted interest and services con- 
ducted by extraordinary agencies. While Grod often 
visits his church with times of special refreshing, we 
are yet taught to expect, and encouraged to pray for, 
the presence of his renewing Spirit, with every dispen- 
sation of the gospel of his grace. Though frail, self- 
deceiving men are liable to the seductions of Satan, in 
all circumstances ; yet it has been proved, that there are 
special reasons to watch, with painful interest, the pro- 
gress and results of some awakenings, to which the term 
Revival has been attached. Spurious conversions, hasty 
admissions, and other results equally and more to be de- 
plored, have followed such factitious excitements. The 
combination of faithful parental teaching, and the ordi- 
nary services of the sanctuary will be blessed, and in 
any particular church, these means will often be attended 
by seasons of the special power of the Spirit. Let us 
honour God's institutions and he will honour our la- 
bours. 

Sec. VI. Family Worship. 

The discussion of family worship as a means to secure 
family blessings, is almost entirely superseded by the 
existence of a popular and valuable treatise on the sub- 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



139 



ject, which has been long before the public* Still a 
few hints on this topic in the relation which it bears to 
our general subject may not be superfluous. 

1. On the head of a family who conducts the house- 
hold devotions, his position as the leader of others, his 
increasing familiarity with truths, thus twice daily 
brought to his attention, and his confessions and prayers, 
must exert a salutary influence. All are liable to grow 
cold and sluggish in religious affections, forgetful of re- 
ligious duties, and unmindful of religious privileges. 
One, who is regular and sincere in family devotion, will 
be more conscientious and diligent in the closet, and 
these daily occasions to lead the devotions of others will 
help to keep alive the fire of his own sacrifice. The per- 
formance of this duty will exert a happy effect in 
checking evil propensities and fostering the good. Those 
ill tempers which too often arise to mar the affectionate 
intercourse of husband and wife, or parents and children, 
will be restrained in his breast, who with wife and chil- 
dren around him, comes to the solemn reading of God's 
word, to unite in the sweet Psalm of praise, and offer a 
common prayer to a common God and Father. Surely 
must this service degenerate into the merest formality, 
ere he who conducts it, can fail to find all his motives to 
duty quickened, his pious resolutions confirmed, appre- 
hended obstacles to growth in grace weakened or re- 
moved, and every enterprise for the welfare of himself 
and family sustained by these daily recurring opportuni- 
ties for coming to the mercy-seat to find mercy and 

* Thoughts on Family Worship, by Dr. J. W. Alexander. — Board 
of Publication, 1847. 



140 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



grace to help in time of need. The head of a family 
with its cares resting on him, amid the perplexities and 
annoyances of business, is liable to be led away by the 
greedy love of gold, the besetting vice of our nature, to 
forget that he is a husband, father, and master. No 
means could be devised, better adapted to call him back to 
a proper sense of his responsibility, than this daily occa- 
sion to remember the spiritual wants of those, to whom 
he occupies such important relations, and whose Chris- 
tian progress may be materially affected by his perfor- 
mance of his duties, as the priest of his house. Thus he 
will be incited to diligence in training his family to seek 
the spiritual blessings, which he invokes for them. He 
not only becomes a better man, but a better husband, 
father, and master, and while not less mindful to pro- 
vide for his own, the blessings of this life, will be more 
concerned to seek for them the true riches. 

If blessed with a pious wife, he will contribute to her 
advancement in holy living. Her spirits will be re- 
freshed, her anxieties soothed, and her soul strengthened, 
while he leads her in devotion to the throne of grace. 
And if she be not pious, this daily service will be a most 
efficient method, by which to point her to heaven and 
lead the way. 

Of course all that we have adduced as to the advanta- 
ges of this service to the head of a family finds an ap- 
plication but slightly modified, to the widowed mother, 
the son, or pious teacher, on whom, in the death or ab- 
sence of the father, the performance of this service will 
fall. It has sometimes appeared edifying for a pious 
wife to conduct family worship, when the husband is un- 



FAMILY KELIGION. 



141 



regenerate, or, for any reason,, declines performing his 
duty. The propriety of this course must be decided in 
each particular case, and we forbear offering any re- 
marks, except to say, that anything like assumption 
ought to be avoided by the wife, and the husband's full 
approbation should always be secured. She is not 
hindered from the more private service of praying with 
and for her children. 

2. Family worship exercises a healthful influence on 
the mere secular and intellectual welfare of the house- 
hold. Habits of early rising, punctuality, neatness, and 
order are cultivated, by their stated period of assembling 
as a family. A day begun in the practice of these minor 
morals, connected with a season of such solemn interest, 
will be more probably spent in a proper observance of 
the regulations for the routine of life, which depend for 
their efficiency on the existence of such habits. The at- 
tendance of children on school, the prompt fulfilment of 
the engagements of business by adults, and, generally, 
the right doing of what is to be done, at the right time, 
are specimens of these incidental temporal benefits which 
arise from this service. The reading of the Scriptures 
and the offering of prayer call for intellectual effort on 
the part of those present, whose attention is given to what 
is read, and to the sentiments expressed in prayer. The 
bulk of the poetry, used in songs of praise, is well suited 
to cultivate the imagination, and improve the literary 
taste of all who become familiar with its use. Nor should 
we forget that music forms an important part of educa- 
tion, refining the sensibilities, and training the mind to a 
susceptibility for all delicate and softening influences. 



142 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



Children accustomed to sing in family worship, generally 
become fond of the exercise, and the habit of singing fa- 
miliar psalms and hymns when alone, thus often induced, 
becomes not only a valuable and pleasing exercise for 
the mind, but will preclude the entrance of many evil 
thoughts, and by association, introduce some most impor- 
tant and valuable reflections. 

The widely and justly celebrated intelligence of the 
Scotch peasantry, is, doubtless due more to their reli- 
gious training, of which family worship is a most impor- 
tant means, than to any other cause. Other nations 
possess as generally established, and, perhaps, as well 
conducted parochial schools, but they lack this added 
power of home teaching. No Bible reading people can 
fail to become more enlightened. They will learn to 
think to more purpose and converse more intelligently, 
and their moral principles will give vigour and activity 
to mental habits. 

3. The religious influences of family worship on all, 
but especially on the children, constitute its highest 
commendation. They are thus led from the earliest pe- 
riod, to feel that God is to be honoured, is the source 
of every good and perfect gift, and that to know, love, 
fear, and trust him is the highest privilege and most 
solemn duty. By this service, the first instructions of 
lisping infancy and childhood are enforced by daily ex- 
amples ; and the lessons of God's word, sanctioned by the 
conduct of a revered father, will be more indelibly im- 
pressed on the hearts of those who receive them. Let 
those who choose, sneer at the prejudices of early Chris- 
tian education. The sophistical reasonings with which 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



143 



men of no religion, or no right views of true piety, en- 
deavour to sap the wise institutions of our fathers, will 
be more fully considered hereafter. See Chapter VI. 
If the so called prejudices are right, let them be imbibed, 
and the earlier the better. Even the " speechless babe" 
may be taught by the patient stillness of this sweet sa- 
cred hour, to associate God's worship with its first ideas 
of all that is solemn and separate from earth. To older 
children, and other members of the family, this daily 
reading of God's word becomes not only a mental stimu- 
lant, by the sublimity of its themes, the perspicuousness 
of its teachings, and the discriminating power of its rea- 
sonings, but also a source of actual increase of knowledge 
of Divine things. Though, from indifference or inca- 
pacity, they may neglect the word of God generally, 
here are about seven hundred occasions yearly, when they 
are called to attend to its inspired instructions. To those 
in whose minds the question of awakening ignorance, 
" How shall we pray ?" has arisen, these daily prayers 
are an answer. Then the gushings forth, in a father's 
petitions, of his tender anxieties for the spiritual welfare 
of his household, will often subdue natures hitherto cal- 
lous to his admonitions and warnings. Through the 
day, and in the calm quiet of their midnight hours, the 
words of sacred writ, read with the simple and affecting 
tenderness of parental love, or those of earnest, wrestling 
prayer, which went "not out of feigned lips," will be 
heard in their souls. Those parents with whom children 
have bowed in daily prayer, will be associated in the 
minds of such children, with the solemn and tender scenes 
of the hours of devotion, and their authority will be 



144 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



strengthened, and one of the strongest of earthly attach- 
ments will be made yet stronger, by the bands of re- 
ligious obligation. Happy those parents who have re- 
ceived their children from God in a second birth, and an 
everlasting life of holiness. Much do they contribute to 
secure this result, who pray "with and for them," in 
morning and evening family worship. On all the members 
of the family, this precious religious service will cast a 
hallowing influence. Husbands and wives become more 
truly one in Christ, parents more diligent and children 
more obedient, masters more considerate and servants 
more faithful, brothers more tender and sisters more 
devoted, who have thus, for years, heard together the 
words of heavenly truth, lifted together to God common 
songs of praise and thanksgiving, and sought and found 
in common, at the throne of the heavenly grace, " mercy 
and grace," in their times of need.* 

In concluding these suggestions on the means by 
which the ends of the family constitution are to be at- 
tained, we must remind our readers that we are to ex- 
pect the blessing of God, rather on their combined opera- 
tion, than on the use of any one. The employment of 
all together constitutes a truly happy home. All the 
plans of parents should conspire to the production of this 
sweet representation of Eden's bliss, this efficient source 
of the best affections of human nature. Were we called 
on to express in one sentence, the sum of all the counsel 
we have suggested, both as to parental duty, and the 

* For the train of thought pursued in the foregoing suggestions, it 
is scarcely necessary to say that the writer is much indebted to the 
work already mentioned. 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



145 



best means to secure family blessings, and their influen- 
ces on man, we would say, Make home happy. But the 
work cannot be done with similar brevity. We must 
assiduously cultivate all the means by which it may be 
performed. As God in nature effects some of his might- 
iest wonders by the combinations of many littles, so must 
we rightly appreciate all agencies and influences, even 
the least. The rain and the dew moisten the earth by 
myriads of drops ; the coral reefs grow by the silent la- 
bours of millions of insects. The trees and earth put on 
the verdure of spring, by the quiet working of countless 
agencies in earth and air. So we must, by the " mighty 
power of littles," in the performance of unnumbered du- 
ties of daily life, and the use of unnumbered means 
comprised under any one of the general topics discussed, 
endeavour to train our households for the duties of earth, 
and the more solemn destinies of another world. Let us 
not be weary in well-doing, but patiently labour in all 
the paths of duty, and by all the means of success, as- 
sured that as we sow, so shall we reap. 

Sec. VIII. The means for the religious improvement 
of servants. 

Much of what has been said on the methods and influ- 
ences to be used for the religious training of children is 
applicable to that of servants. But the peculiar position 
of large numbers in our Southern States, calls for a sepa- 
rate consideration of the best means to promote their re- 
ligious welfare. We can, however, only present a few 
hints, and this is less to be regretted, inasmuch as the 
13 



146 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



admirable essay of Dr. Jones,* on this subject, contains 
all that need be offered, and presents the results of long 
experience and observation, by one whose zeal and suc- 
cess in the work of which it treats, give him a right to 
be heard. 

1. On the larger plantations of the South, where the 
servants form a distinct community, the services of a 
special chaplain are required, who may, by the usual 
public preaching of the gospel, and schools for the re- 
ligious instruction of the young, provide for their en- 
tire religious culture, as for that of any other community. 
Or the servants of several contiguous and smaller estates 
may be united as one charge, under similar arrangements. 
Or the pastor of the church, in whose bounds the ser- 
vants reside, may extend to them such special instructions 
as he has leisure to give, besides preaching to them, in 
common with others, in the ordinary Sabbath services. 
This latter method is most practicable in the great ma- 
jority of neighbourhoods. It was that employed with 
eminent success, by the Rev. S. Davies and Dr. J. H. Rice, 
in Virginia, the fruits of which still exist. 

2. Where no chaplaincy exists, pastors have but little 
opportunity or leisure for giving the special religious in- 
structions which servants need. This must be done, as 
it was in the primitive church, by catechetical exercises. 
Masters, or other suitable persons in their families, may 
perform this service. Owing to the great variety of reli- 
gious sects, and the general preference for particular 
churches manifested by the slaves, great embarrassments 

* " Suggestions on the Religious Instruction of the Negroes/' — By 
the Rev. 0. C. Jones, D. D. — Presbyterian Board of Publication. 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



147 



arise in the attempts to impart instruction to adults by 
this method. "While some are indifferent and hostile to 
religious teaching, just as other sinners and for the same 
reason, that the carnal mind is enmity to the law of 
God, many, under the guise of attachment to some 
other church, refuse to accept the religious teaching of 
those whom they regard as possessed of no more than a 
religious theory obtained from books. Hence the most 
efficient means for the religious improvement of servants 
is the careful instruction of the young. No prejudices 
here intervene. By the Scriptures and catechisms they 
can be taught the truths of religion essential to salvation, 
as well as others. As such persons are remarkably fond 
of singing, a selection of some twenty or thirty Psalms 
and hymns, in which the most important doctrines of ex- 
perimental piety are embraced, may be made, and they 
may be induced to commit them to memory. They 
may also be taught select portions of Scripture in the 
same manner. According to the wishes of the master, 
they may be taught to read. The art of reading is 
not essential to obtaining a knowledge of the saving 
truths of the gospel. Even in those countries in which 
all classes of the population have secured to them the 
benefits of elementary education, it has often appeared, 
that the engrossing occupations of labour and the 
customs of recreation have virtually deprived the la- 
bouring classes of any practical benefit arising from 
their advantages. Though taught to read, they forget 
the art by mere want of practice. So it often happens 
when slaves are taught. In this matter masters may ex- 
ercise a wise discretion. 



148 : FAMILY RELIGION. 

3. A question has arisen, whether masters ought to 
compel the attendance of all their servants on the public 
preaching' of the Gospel. It is one of great practical 
difficulty. If answered affirmatively, still the opportuni- 
ties for such attendance are various, and the question 
then arises as to the church to be selected, when such 
servants have different religious predilections among them- 
selves and from that of the master. Compulsion of 
adults, in matters of religion, is, at least, of doubtful pro- 
priety. If the young servants are compelled to .wait on 
regular religious services, as they grow up, much may be 
expected from the formation of good habits. In view of 
all the difficulties suggested, we are disposed to say, that 
those who perform their duty, in carefully instructing the 
young, and using all moral methods of persuasion, admo- 
nition, and encouragement to the older, will ordinarily 
find that the blessing of God will follow their labours to a 
greater extent than should they rely on compulsory mea- 
sures alone for adults. The example of Abraham (Gen. 
xviii. 19) has been urged as conclusive, in respect to com- 
pulsory measures. Not to discuss questions of interpre- 
tation, it is enough to say, that the relations of master 
and servant in Abraham's day, and indeed during the 
Mosaic dispensation, partook far more of the despotic 
feature, than now exists. The control of the master was 
more absolute. The population was homogeneous in re- 
ligious faith. The whole form of government was more 
patriarchal, and the institutions of religion were of one 
kind. "We have no hesitation in affirming, that the mas- 
ter should use authority to prevent the use of heathen 
worship, and should as far as possible, by all his domes- 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



149 



tic arrangements, not only permit, but encourage his 
servants to attend some place of public religious worship. 
But when he shall have performed his part to such ser- 
vants, while under the age of discretion, and used such 
means to influence them afterwards, as have been intimated, 
we think he has fully followed the spirit of Abraham's 
example. 

4. Another question has been suggested. Should 
masters have the sacrament of Baptism administered to 
their infant servants ? If the children of pious parents, 
the duty devolves on them. If not, then, as indeed in 
all cases, the affirmative answer involves many difficulties. 
The master and servant are subject to other laws, the 
operation of which may entirely prevent him from carry- 
ing out the purposes designed by such an ordinance. 
Again, for reasons already given, the relation of master 
and servant now is far from being parallel with that 
which existed among the Jews ; and the dissimilarities 
bear against the attempt to carry out fully the parallel 
between the circumcision and baptism of infant servants. 

5. Of much more practical importance are those 
questions relating to the means for promoting moral and 
religious habits among servants. On such especially as 
concern the marriage and parental relation, whatever be 
the laws of men, masters are bound by the laws of God, 
in the performance of those duties already inculcated, to 
use all appropriate means for sustaining the integrity of 
the family union, and thus promoting the moral and reli- 
gious improvement of servants. Besides those general in- 
structions in the doctrines and duties of our holy religion, 
which underlie all other means to this end, they may 

13* 



150 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



greatly promote it, by providing suitable accommodations 
for servants, preventing the occurrence of temptations to 
conjugal infidelity, sustaining the authority of parents, 
especially of such as are pious, over their children, and 
restraining all servants from frequenting places of dissi- 
pation and vice. Neatness, order, and comfort in their 
humble homes will have the same moral effect, which they 
produce in the homes of others : and their personal habits, 
as to the use of ardent spirits, will greatly hinder or fa- 
vour the reception of religious instructions. All the ar- 
rangements of the house and farm should be so directed, 
that servants may have command of as much of Sabbath 
time for Sabbath duties, as is possible, for any persons 
occupying the places of menials. Masters should readily 
surrender to them portions of some other day for such 
recreation or occupation in their own private interests as 
may be proper and convenient, that on Sabbath they 
may be at full liberty to engage in the appropriate duties 
and privileges of holy time. 

In these remarks we have not had in view the condi- 
tion of hired free servants, because, ordinarily, no special 
means for their religious instruction are demanded ; and 
yet it may be a question for reflection, by those whom 
it concerns, whether, especially in our large cities, more 
interest might not be exhibited, and more direct means 
well employed, for rescuing a large class of such servants 
from the influences of a baptized paganism. Meanwhile, 
household servants of every kind enjoy, in family wor- 
ship and intercourse with superiors, valuable means for 
their improvement, which those affording them may make 
abundantly fruitful of blessing. 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



151 



These hints have already exceeded our proposed lim- 
its. The topic is one of too much interest, to be passed 
over entirely in this connection, but, at the same time, 
too extensive in its various bearings for a fuller dis- 
cussion. 



152 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



CHAPTER IV. 

THE RELATION OF THE FAMILY TO THE CHURCH. 

Our form of government teaches, that " the universal 
church consists of all those persons, in every nation, 
together with their children, who make profession of the 
holy religion of Christ, and of submission to his laws 
(Form of Gov. chap. ii. 2,) and that a particular church 
consists of the same materials, limited by the circumstan- 
ces of number and place," voluntarily associated together." 
[Ibid. 4.) According to this definition, the family may be 
regarded as an integral element of the church. For, 
even when but one parent is pious, the children are em- 
braced in the covenant, and for this reason the unbe- 
lieving parent is "sanctified," or set apart as an agent 
for the service of God, either as " the guardian of one of 
his chosen ones," or, as the mother of those, who, by 
their father's faith, are members of the visible church.* 

God was pleased to place a high honour on the family, 
by depositing within its sacred enclosure the germ of his 
church. The temporal benefits offered to Abraham and 
his seed, in the covenant, which God made with him, 
( Gen. xiii. 14, 15 ; xv. 7, 18 ; xvii. 2-22,) were but 



* See Dr. Hodge on 1 Corinthians, vii. 14. 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



153 



types of those richer spiritual blessings, which were pro- 
vided in that memorable act of Divine condescension and 
mercy ; for not only was Abraham appointed the head 
and founder of a great nation, destined to be "high 
above all people in praise, in name, and in honour," 
(Deut. xxvi. 19,) but he was also chosen to be the "fa- 
ther" of the faithful (Kom. iv. 16) people of God of all 
ages. He and his household were the called,* or, the 
church of God. While God was pleased to provide for 
the increase of the visible church, by that of Abraham's 
natural descendants, he also indicated that the fulfil- 
ment of his promise thus to multiply his seed, was sus- 
pended on Abraham's performance of his duty as the 
head of his family in commanding his children and his 
household after him, "to keep the way of the Lord." 
Gen. xviii. 19. Whether then we regard the covenant 
with Abraham as the fundamental principle of the origi- 
nal constitution of a church in the world, or as only 
providing for a more definite organization of that " con- 
gregation of faithful men," who, since the days of Seth 
had called on the name of the Lord, it is evident that 
the church of the New Testament rests on that covenant, 
and that although the seal has been changed, the blessings 
provided and offered by God, and accepted by his people, 
are the same under the Christian as under the patriar- 
chal and Mosaic dispensation. f 

The peculiar relation subsisting between the family 

* The word WA^tna " church," is derived from the verb, WaAEw, to 
call out. 

fThe third chapter of the Epistle to the Galatians, vs. 7-9, 14-18, 
27-29, clearly sustains these positions. 



154 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



of Abraham and the church no longer exists. Still God, 
in his word and by his providence, as the considerations, 
advanced in the foregoing chapters, clearly evince, has 
continued to honour the family constitution, as an agent 
for glorifying him by dispensing spiritual blessings to man. 
This great moral purpose to which it is adapted and for 
which it was in part designed, (see Chapter II,) is the 
same as that for which the church was solely instituted. 
Its agency is more limited than that of the church, and 
the methods by which that agency is rendered efficient, 
are subordinate to the divinely appointed means of grace, 
with the dispensation of which the church has been en- 
trusted. They are also subservient to those means. 
Thus the family, though not a coordinate, is a cooperative 
institution with the church of God. This relation has 
ever been recognized by our church. She contends for 
it doctrinally in the ordinance of baptism, and practi- 
cally in the position and duties assigned to the pastor. 
He is appointed not only to preach in the pulpit, but al- 
so to be the chief religious teacher of the child. Pastoral 
visitation, catechising, admonition, and the careful over- 
sight of the ignorant, as well as the anxious and enqui- 
ring members of the family, are made his duties. On 
the other hand, by means of the family organization, 
the way is opened for the more faithful and efficient per- 
formance of his work. The relation of the family to the 
church, both as a constituent part of the household of 
faith, and as an important auxiliary in the work of man's 
salvation, may be more fully developed by some special 
considerations. 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



155 



Sec. I. The family a means for enlarging the church. 

By means of the family, provision is made for the en- 
largement of the church. We depreciate none of the 
benevolent enterprises by which it is proposed to dis- 
seminate the gospel in our own destitute regions, or in 
heathen lands. The church is the depository and propa- 
gator of the truth. "We may not wait, till, by some 
ordinary dispensation of providence, Christian families 
may have settled in such regions, and become the agents 
of rearing another generation in the knowledge and love 
of the gospel. We must send the living minister, and 
by the preaching of the gospel " make ready a people 
prepared" for appreciating and employing the means by 
which the family constitution may be made a blessing. 
Then this agency becomes subservient to that of the 
church. From Christian families, in a very few years, 
may spring up other Christian families, in quadruplicate 
or larger proportions, and these, in their turn, may be- 
come sources of still enlarging accessions to the house- 
hold of faith. Did all Christian parents properly appre- 
ciate and perform their duties, it is impossible to form 
any adequate conception of the rapidity and power, with 
which Christ's kingdom would advance. Had Abraham's 
descendants, according to the promise, those related to 
him through Isaac, persevered in the faith and piety of 
their ancestor, the Jewish nation and the true church of 
God would have been identical, and the vast multitudes 
of those national descendants would themselves have ap- 
proximated to a fulfilment of the promise to be verified as 
to his spiritual seed. Gen. xv. 5 ; xvii. 4-6. Rom. iv. 
18. Gal. iii. 7, 8 ; xiv. 29. Even under the imperfect 



156 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



manner in which parents now meet their responsibilities, 
we are often called to admire the blessed results, flowing 
from God's forbearing love and faithfulness to his cove- 
nant. The statistics of infant baptisms in our church 
for any given year, compared with the reported acces- 
sions by examination, for some period* fifteen or twenty 
years later, give us good reason to believe, that the bulk 
of such baptized members become communicants. The 
increasing population of the country, the numbers added 
who have been baptized in other communions, or never 
have been baptized in infancy, and other causes, enter, 
as disturbing elements, into such calculations. Still we 
are sustained in the general correctness of the above sug- 
gestion, by the fact, that such investigations made in 
particular churches, give very similar results. We have 
but recently heard there was a family in one of our city 
churches, whose members, forty years ago, were easily 
accommodated in one pew. The descendants of that fa- 
mily now fill fifteen pews. The labours of Rev. Samuel 
Davies, in Virginia, a century since, were greatly blessed. 
But as they extended over a large district of a sparsely 
settled territory, they did not result in the immediate 
formation of many flourishing churches. Yet many of 
those families, then isolated, which received the gospel 
by his occasional ministrations, became the sources of 
other Christian families, and the centres of Christian in- 
fluence on their connections by marriage, and on their 
other neighbours, so that, with the materials thus pre- 
pared, many churches have since been formed. 

Besides the direct increase of the numbers of Christ's 
followers produced by the increase in Christian house- 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



157 



holds, such often exercise other agencies in the work of 
enlarging the kingdom of God on earth. A few Chris- 
tian families — sometimes only one — settled in a destitute 
region, may become an encouragement and aid to the 
efforts of a missionary. Much as we must regret to see 
once nourishing churches decimated, and almost dis- 
organized by emigration ; yet this evil is often more 
than repaired, when the emigrating families scattering 
and settling in new portions of the country become * the- 
means of founding many other churches, and propaga- 
ting Christian influences in the places of their new resi- 
dence. Nor should we forget how a well ordered Chris- 
tian house becomes a blessing to any neighbourhood, 
even where a church already exists. The example of 
Christian parents and well trained children and servants 
will be felt in other families. Their morning and eve- 
ning worship ascends to God as acceptable incense, and 
in answer to their prayers, ungodliness is arrested and 
truth takes effect on the hearts of others. For " ten's 
sake" God was ready to hold back from Sodom his im- 
pending judgments, and we have no reason to doubt that 
in our day, his providential government may still be thus 
conducted. 

Sec. II. The family an aid to the pastor s labours. 

Every Christian family is a small congregation. As 
already intimated, the pastor has, in such a household, 
materials properly prepared, to receive his spiritual coun- 
sels. The children and servants are prepossessed in fa- 
vour of him and his message. Religious doctrines are 
subjects with which they are already somewhat familiar, 

and they have been taught to regard the great objects for 
14 



158 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



■which the pastor labours, as the most important which 
can engage their attention. They will also be prepared 
for hearing the word preached, with more profit. One 
great reason why so much preaching is inefficient, is be- 
cause so many hearers are ignorant of the first princi- 
ples of Christian doctrine, and are therefore incapable of 
appreciating and understanding ordinary gospel ministra- 
tions. Many do not apprehend the meaning of some of 
*the'most common terms used in theology, or the ideas, 
which such terms convey to their minds, are so confused 
and indistinct, that no permanent anoTprofitable impres- 
sions are made. Again, the instructions of the pulpit 
need to be followed up at the fireside. The members 
of Christian families find the lessons of the church con- 
firmed and impressed on their hearts by the lessons of 
home, and illustrated in the lives of revered and hon- 
oured parents, the examples for their imitation. Their 
confidence in their pastor will not be weakened by the 
cavils against his teaching and criticisms on his imperfec- 
tions, which form the staple of conversation at the Sabbath 
dinner tables of too many families ; but by the commenda- 
tions of his excellencies and the approbation of his in- 
structions, heard from the lips of their parents, they will 
be led more highly to revere his person, and more candidly 
and submissively to receive his counsels. 

Sec. III. The family a nursery of active Church 
members. 

When persons who have been religiously educated be- 
come the subjects of the great change wrought by God's 
Spirit, they often fail to evince as strong emotions 
of sorrow or joy, in the exercises of conviction, penitence, 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



159 



and faith, as some others manifest. This may be ascrib- 
able to that familiarity with religious truth, which they 
have gradually attained, and their frequent experience of 
the ordinary convictions and impressions of the word 
and Spirit. But their convictions are no less thorough, 
and their change no less decided. Indeed their familiar- 
ity with Scripture truth greatly aids the work of saneti- 
fication, and they, generally, engage more decidedly and 
thoroughly in " living unto righteousness," than some who 
may have appeared more promising at the beginning of 
a Christian career. Their development of character, as 
the disciples of Christ, will be more uniform and 1 consis- 
tent. They are less liable to be " tossed to and fro, and 
carried about by every wind of doctrine," to be misled 
by new and strange customs, and methods of Christian 
enterprise of doubtful propriety, or, in short, to be se- 
duced by any of the numerous "novelties" which disturb 
the peace of the Churcfy and bring reproach on Christ's, 
name. On the contrary, they readily fall into the habits 
of the Christian life, enter with alacrity on its regular, 
ordinary duties, and pursue them with persevering dili- 
gence and assiduity. They form the bulk of that steady, 
reliable " Church within the Church," to be found in all 
congregations, who encourage the pastor, by their pres- 
ence at the prayer-meeting, and their prompt participa- 
tion in the exercises of the Bible-class and the labours 
of the Sabbath-school. They are generally ready for 
every work of benevolence, and if endowed with wealth, 
become the liberal benefactors of the institutions of 
Zion. 

When they become parents, they are prepared to as- 



160 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



sume their new responsibilities. They do not worry 
their pastor with cavils about infant Baptism. They in- 
stitute family worship and pursue the whole routine of 
Christian life, to the pattern of which they have been ac- 
customed from their youth. 

It is by no means pretended, that such are the only 
Christians who are thus reliable, consistent, and uniform 
in their Christian relations and duties. On the .contrary, 
some of the most eminent servants of God have been 
taken as "brands plucked from the burning." Our re- 
marks, so far as they imply' a comparison, rather relate 
to classes, than individuals, and exceptions to all such 
general statements are well known to exist and are cheer- 
fully admitted. 

Sec. IV. The family an aid to the devotional services 
of the Church. 

It occurs to us, in this connection, to advert to a method, 
which we make no doubt would ultimately effect a most 
desirable reform in congregational singing; or rather, in 
some cases, would be the effectual means of introducing 
congregational singing where it does not now exist. 
This most pleasing, solemn, and useful part of divine 
worship is often sadly neglected. In some of our largest 
congregations, few, except the choir, join in singing God's 
praises ; and sometimes that body is reduced to a few 
amateurs in music, whose performances, although distin- 
guished for great scientific and artistic merit, are not 
calculated to aid, very much, the devotions of God's peo- 
ple. Some ascribe the defects of congregational singing 
to the use of organs, or other instruments of music, where 
such have been introduced ; and suggest their banishment, 

i 



FAMILY RELIGION. 161 

as a speedy and effectual method for securing good sing- 
ing. But the same defect is found to exist in churches, 
which have most decidedly refused to admit any instru- 
mental music. Hence, in such cases, the choirs are 
blamed, who, it is said, have usurped to themselves 
alone the work of praising God, and excluded the peo- 
ple from all participation in singing, by the selection of 
new or difficult melodies, and such as are not adapted to 
popular use. In most cases, however, it will be found, 
that choirs are rather the result, than the cause of de- 
fective congregational singing. Other causes have been 
assigned for the evil, of which all complain, such as the 
custom of singing without parcelling the lines, the want 
of good music and teachers, the variety of music books, or 
the use of books with round notes. Now it is perhaps 
true, that there are particular instances, in which organs 
or choirs or both have added nothing to the solemnity 
of the service and discouraged the singing of a few per- 
sons ; others, in which choirs, by a gradual assumption 
of privilege, have almost destroyed congregational sing- 
ing, and even subjected pastors to the humiliating alter- 
native of conducting the worship of God without singing, 
or submitting the selection of the words as well as the 
tunes, to irresponsible and injudicious persons. So also 
on the ignorant or those too careless to provide books, or 
too indifferent to learn to sing, the other alleged causes 
of the evil may have operated. But the cause which 
most generally prevails, may be stated in very few words : 
the people do not love to sing; while this is so, the destruc- 
tion of all instruments, the dispersion of all choirs, and 
14 * 



162 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



the banishment of all books from the pews, will not se- 
cure the desired reformation.. 

This reformation must begin in the family. Let sing- 
ing be practised in family worship. Children love to 
sing. If accustomed, from early life, to this use of their 
voices, they will acquire and cultivate a taste for music 
and grow up to be singers in the congregation. Nor is 
the benefit of this home culture limited to its influence 
on the music of the church. The singing of the same 
melodies and the same words in church, to which they 
have been accustomed at home, will form the basis of 
many sweet and tender associations, which may after- 
ward serve to soften the heart to a susceptibility of the 
solemn truths and impressions of the public worship of 
God, even when such may have been long resisted. In- 
deed, when we consider the evangelical character of our 
psalms and hymns, it must occur to every reflecting 
person, that the spiritual benefits of congregational sing- 
ing are highly important. Many valuable truths are 
thus most deeply and permanently impressed. The mere 
reading of good hymns is profitable, and the concord of 
sweet and solemn sounds is pleasing to the ear and to the 
taste. Much more valuable is that exercise, which asso- 
ciates, with time honoured and delicious melodies, the more 
time honoured and inspiriting truths of the Bible. In the 
want of space to pursue this topic further, we refer our 
readers to the work already noticed.* 

Although, ordinarily, the members and even elders of 
the church are not expected to take part as leaders in 
the prayers of the sanctuary, connected with the preach- 

* Alexander's Thoughts on Family Worship, — p. 226. 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



163 



ing of the gospel, yet none, who know the power and 
value of prayer, can be insensible to the importance of 
social prayer-meetings. To say nothing of the answer 
to prayer, promised and vouchsafed by a prayer-hearing 
God, to those who " agree together" in making known 
their requests to him, wlrjch constitutes the leading mo- 
tives for Christians thus to " assemble themselves to- 
gether," we are persuaded, that the influence of such 
meetings on the devotional feelings and experimental re- 
ligion of a Christian community, cannot be too highly 
appreciated. But, alas ! how often does the pastor find, 
that he has but few Aarons and Hurs in his flock ! 
While the church may be crowded on Sabbath morning, 
often the hour for the prayer-meeting witnesses a most 
meagre attendance. The female members of the church 
may be well represented, but of the other sex scarcely a 
twentieth part are present. "VVe once knew a venerable 
elder, who was candid enough to confess, that he did not 
attend prayer-meetings, because, he did not wish to be 
called on to lead in prayer. In some cases, such meet- 
ings are held on a secular day, and at an hour when at- 
tendance might interfere with the ordinary pursuits of 
men of business. Hence habitual absence from the 
weekly prayer-meeting is often justified by the absentee, 
on the allegation, that his attendance might greatly in- 
commode himself or others having business relations 
with him. Surely a weekly meeting in the country can- 
not produce as much inconvenience, ordinarily, as a daily 
meeting in the cities, and we have found that such may 
be well attended, for a long season. But even when the 
time of meeting is fixed for some hour of the Sabbath, 



164 



FAMILY KELIGION. 



we still find that the attendance is thin. We believe the 
reason for such neglect of social prayer, generally true, 
is that even those who have some measure of devotional 
feeling, are unaccustomed to pray in the presence of 
others. It seldom occurs that those, who are regular 
and zealous in family prayer, ha^e any material difficulty 
as to' conducting the prayers of others. It is by the 
home training in praying with his family, that the Chris- 
tian is fitted for the work of praying with the people of 
God, to their edification and with comfort to himself. If 
there is a want of the spirit of prayer, there is great 
power, as we have already observed, in the exercise of fa- 
mily prayer to call it forth and nourish it to lively vigour. 
To improve the character and increase the number of 
our prayer-meetings, and thus advance the cause of true 
piety among our people, is thus one of the many modes 
by which the family may prove subservient to the church. 

Sec. V. The family prepares officers for the Church. 

The proper religious training of children prepares them 
to be officers of the church. In most of our churches, 
we think it may be safely said, that the majority of our 
elders and deacons are sons of pious parents. This, in- 
deed, might be presumed to be the case, in view of the 
remarks already made, on the influence exerted by early 
religious training on the subsequent developments of 
Christian character. We know no better mode of im- 
pressing on others our own convictions on this topic, than 
by citing a few well authenticated facts, which may also 
serve to repel the repeated and foolish charge, that the 
children of ministers and other pious persons, more fre- 
quently continue to lead ungodly lives, than those of 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



165 



other persons. In our Theological Seminaries it has 
been so often found, on actual enumeration, that the great 
majority of candidates for the ministry were sons of 
Christian parents, that such may now be generally pre- 
sumed to be true. In one institution, it was ascer- 
tained, that, at one time, five-sixths of the students had 
been blessed with parents, both of whom were pious, and 
nearly every one of the remaining sixth, had either a 
pious father or mother. In another, out of about fifty 
students, but - one was found, neither of whose parents 
was a member of the church, and, in that case, the piety 
of his deceased mother had always been to her friends, a 
subject of just and pleasing hope. In the same seminary, 
at one time, it was noticed, that one third of the students 
were sons of ministers. Of one hundred ministers whose 
biographical sketches appear in Dr. Sprague's "Annals," 
there were as many as one hundred and ten sons, who 
entered the same profession. A few years ago, Dr. Al- 
exander stated in his treatise on Family Worship, " There 
is a blessed instance in our own communion of six living 
preachers of the gospel, all sons of one man, himself a 
servant of the sanctuary." In an address before the 
Synod of Pittsburgh, by the Rev. Loyal Young, he says, 
" In this Synod was a devoted servant of the sanctuary, 
whose father, two uncles, and a brother, were also min- 
isters, and four of whose sons are this day ministering 
before God. * * * Nine ministers in one family in three 
generations !" We know a family connection, the an- 
cestor of which, five sons, a son-in-law, three grandsons, 
and two grandsons-in-law, in all twelve persons, have 
belonged to this sacred profession, of whom ten are now 



166 



FAMILY KELIGION. 



living. From an elder of one of the oldest Virginia 
churches, who died about sixty years since, have de- 
scended eleven ministers, and nine ministers' wives, giv- 
ing a total of twenty ministers in one family connection, 
in three generations. That which is pleasing to observe 
in this case, is the fact, that the numbers belonging to 
the several generations, show that the blessing of God on 
religious culture has continued to increase, with the widen- 
ing circle of descendants. Of the twenty ministers, 
the first generation furnished one ; the second, eight ; and 
the third, eleven. Of that third generation, there are 
now also several candidates for the ministry. From the 
same elder, have also descended eight or ten elders, and 
wives of elders. It deserves remark also that, humanly 
speaking, the influences under the direct operation of 
which most of these results seem to have been produced, 
may be traced immediately to the existence of religion 
in the family of the venerable elder ; and as an apt illus- 
tration of our remark on the combined working of the 
pulpit and the family constitution, we may add, that this 
elder and his wife were converts under the ministry of 
Rev. Samuel Davies, neither having previously enjoyed 
(so far as can be now learned) the privileges of evan- 
gelical preaching or the influence of Christian education. 

Doubtless, the family histories of Scotland, and our 
own country, would furnish a volume Of as pleasing con- 
firmations of the views we have presented, as any now 
adduced. Our God is a covenant-keeping God, and this 
is the covenant which he has revealed, and to which he 
has set the seal by his providential dealings, " My Spirit 
that is upon thee and my words which I have put in thy 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



167 



mouth, shall not depart out of thy mouth, nor out of the 
mouth of thy seed, nor out of the mouth of thy seed's 
seed, saith the Lord, from henceforth and for ever." 
Isa. lix. 21. Let us perform our part, and God will as- 
suredly be faithful to his gracious promises. 



168 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



CHAPTER V. 

THE VALUE, DIFFICULTIES, AND AIDS TO FAMILY RE- 
LIGION. 

The family constitution is not necessarily a blessing. 
The head of the household may prove unfaithful to his 
trust, and negligent of his duties, or tyrannical and cruel 
in his government, and both the teacher and example of 
wickedness, to those of his own house. The wife may be 
petulant, untidy, and wasteful ; children, obstinate and un- 
ruly ; and servants refractory, sullen, and disorderly. 
So also the constitution of civil society is not always a 
source of blessing. Rulers may be tyrants. Judges 
may pervert justice. Law may be used as the instrument 
of oppression. The subjects of government may rebel, 
and the means devised for their welfare be perverted to 
their injury. Even the church may be perverted from 
that holy end for which God designed it, to be an engine 
of destructive power to those very interests, which it was 
adapted to promote. Its ministers may become the min- 
isters of Satan, its doctrines be corrupted, or set aside 
by the traditions of men, and the authority of its glori- 
fied Head be employed by hypocritical officers, ruling in 
his name, to sustain their frauds, violence, and oppression. 

The evils which have thus arisen from institutions, de- 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



169 



signed and adapted to promote human welfare, have been 
often ascribed, by self-conceited men, to the institutions 
themselves. Hence they have proposed those various 
methods of reconstructing society, which have been 
known as Communism, Socialism, and Agrarianism. 
Hence the schemes of the so called " Women's Rights" 
faction, and many other mischievous or ridiculous plans 
for ameliorating man's condition. We might show how 
all these schemes are necessarily failures, owing to the 
false proposition on which they rest, that man is natur- 
ally free from sin, or, as negatively stated, is not naturally 
depraved. As they fail to take account of man's de- 
pravity as sufficiently explaining the evils flowing from 
the perversion of good institutions, so they fail to recog- 
nize its cure, as essential to their methods of reformation. 
They propose to reform society in masses, to subject men 
in companies to the working of some great moral ma- 
chine. They undertake to correct great evils by law ; 
and to change public sentiment by a course of lectures, 
or a bushel of memorials. It has been well said, that 
" the kingdom of this world's morality cometh with obser- 
vation." Now such is not God's plan. As in the nat- 
ural, so in the moral world, he works changes by that 
mighty power of littles of which we before spoke. The 
opinion of the public, which we call public sentiment, is 
that of the individuals making up the public. The re- 
formation of the public must be a reformation of per- 
sons. 

The gospel is the great instrument of reform. It pro- 
vides for the renewal of individuals. The moral change 
which it produces in any one case, may appear no great 
15 



170 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



matter to any, except the subject of that change. But 
such a change passes on a hundred, or on thousands, and 
thus "whole communities and states are affected. The 
prosperity and happiness of any one person may not be a 
great matter, beyond his immediate circle, but when hun- 
dreds or thousands share the same blessing, the interests 
of nations become improved. 

Again, every man is related to others. His personal, 
moral change, or his prosperity and happiness, will affect 
the interests of others. Still the work is a work of de- 
tail. By the combination of these many particular 
changes and the influences which flow from them, both 
separately and in combination, the great reforms of the 
world are to be produced. 

Sec. I. The value of religion in the family. 

It is according to the foregoing suggestions, that we 
learn how to estimate the value of religion in the family. 
The piety of each of its members makes, in the aggregate, 
the piety of the family. True piety is the only reli- 
able foundation of true happiness, and thus a happy home 
is made ; and an aggregate of happy homes makes a 
happy community or state. 

I. It is needless to enter on an elaborate discussion, 
to show that the evils to which we have adverted, as flow- 
ing from either of the institutions mentioned above, the 
family, the state, or the church, are ascribed to the sins 
of the persons belonging to such institutions. The de- 
sired remedy for such evils is to be found, not by the re- 
construction of the institution to which they pertain, but 
by the reformation of the persons whose sinful conduct 
has produced them. True piety, as already intimated, (Ch. 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



171 



II. Sect. L, is essential to the prevention of such evils, 
and also to secure to the members of the family the full 
benefits arising from the provisions of its constitution. 

1. The simple propensities which belong to human na- 
ture, unchecked by Divine grace, will be developed in 
the family as well as elsewhere. For such development, 
indeed, the peculiar relations of the members of a family 
will often give special occasion. It is true that natural 
instincts and the relationship of protector and dependent, 
supply incentives to much that is praiseworthy in pa- 
rents, children, and servants. Still there are many 
wicked passions, which these causes are unable to curb. 
Whether they are excited by peculiarity of relation or 
not, they are found to exist. The head of a family may, 
in some cases, be tempted to abuse his authority. This 
may be occasioned by a demand, in particular cases, for 
its stern and rigorous exercise. Power is dangerous. 
He is entrusted with it for the good of the whole. He is 
liable to forget others, and seek his own ease and com- 
fort at their expense. The wife may be misled to ques- 
tion her husband's wisdom, and so repel his control in 
her general course of life, because she has, now and then, 
found good reason for believing him in error. Servants 
and children may presume on occasional, perhaps impro- 
per indulgences, to seek exemption from proper restraint 
or manifest rebellious tempers. It is not to be expected, 
in this present state of imperfection, that the tenderest 
ties of natural affection will never be strained, and the 
stream of pure love never be polluted, with some of the 
foul out-pourings of the natural heart. Distrust, jeal- 
ousy, variance, disputings, heart-burnings, evil surmisings, 



172 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



anger, moroseness, and obstinacy, will sometimes be devel- 
oped. Strifes, alienations, bitter words, and sour looks 
will be found among those of kindred blood and residing 
under the same roof. Now, not only do the sacred pre- 
cincts of the family circle forbid the intrusion of the 
agents of human law, for the regulation of domestic in- 
tercourse, but there are evils which human law cannot 
reach. That can only take cognizance of acts. It has 
no power to discern motives. But much of the sinfulness, 
which mars the beauty and destroys the happiness of the 
family, is consistent with a fair exterior. Many is the 
petty tyrant, who, while crushing the spirit of a gentle 
wife, or embittering the lives of children and servants 
with a hard bondage, has worn a gentle, quiet demeanour. 
Many is the wife, who, for years has practised deception 
on a confiding husband, and yet has preserved before 
spectators, the character of honesty and sincerity. Many 
is the youth apparently affectionate and obedient, over 
whose truculent behaviour, parents have wept bitter tears, 
in secret. Many is the servant, even, whose deceit and 
cuririing have misled his master to blame and punish 
others for his own misdeeds. 

But when human law is called on for relief from the 
evils which sin may have produced in a family, and the 
long concealed domestic distempers are exposed, how 
impotent is the law to bring relief ! It can threaten, — it 
can punish. Tor any means it may possess to produce 
reform, the application will have been too late. The 
misery which has grown up so great, as to demand ex- 
posure, has become irremediable by its provisions. The 
agony of the Jewish parents, who felt compelled to 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



178 



bring their rebellious son before the judges, was but 
the climax of a long season of untold miseries. Days 
and years of ill-concealed suspicions, distrust, jealousy, 
recriminations, and bitter revilings, precede the dismal 
hour, when husband appears against wife, or wife against 
husband, at the tribunal of justice, demanding divorce. 
How many long months of anxiety, alternate remonstrance 
and forgiveness, insults and reconciliations, may grieved 
parents and a profligate son spend, ere the outraged father 
disinherits the boy on whose birth he once smiled ! 

Now, to reach the sinful tempers and correct the sin- 
ful conduct, which thus destroy the peace and neutral- 
ize the benefits of the family constitution, human law 
is powerless. Even when permitted to intrude into the 
family circle, it cannot restore its broken harmony. But 
where the law of man may not enter, or entering, fail to 
effect relief, the law of God can enter. It may appear 
in the household to enlighten the conscience, with con- 
demning power, hush up excuses, and directed by the 
Spirit, convince of sin and humble the heart. It is fol- 
lowed by the gospel which can give peace to the troubled 
conscience, by giving peace with God through faith in 
Christ, and impart a renewing and sanctifying power. 

2. The word and Spirit of God not only hinder the 
growth and check the exercise of evil passions, by the 
restraints which they impose, but they also provide the 
most effectual antidote to evil, and remedy for the dis- 
ease of sin, by the new heart and right spirit which they 
give. We have already seen that the duties of the va- 
rious members of the family are only properly performed, 

when they are performed under the influence of Chris- 
15 * 



174 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



tian principle. None are ever free from the remains of 
indwelling corruption while in this world, yet the change 
which God effects by his word and Spirit, leads its subjects 
" to die unto sin more and more, and live unto righteous- 
ness." The relations of the family, which, in the unre- 
generate state of its members, were occasions of sin, 
become under the operation of God's Spirit, occasions of 
increase in the graces of the Spirit. Love, joy, meek- 
ness, long suffering, patience, and gentleness, grow up 
by the exercise of the renewed soul, amid the trials of 
every-day life, and they re-act in the production of their 
kind. 

Thus we learn, that true piety is the sure foundation 
for the purity and power of the family constitution. Its 
value to the household is proportioned to the evils which 
it prevents, and the blessings of peace and prosperity 
which it brings. The habits of life which are so desira- 
ble for all the members of the family to cultivate for their 
individual and common benefit, for time, are just those, 
which the religion of the gospel inculcates. Industry, 
order, peace, obedience, just government, honest and 
faithful services, are the fruits of the fear of God. A fa- 
mily in which the- principles of J)iety abound, will be a 
prosperous and happy family. They furnish the ele- 
ments of happiness which are not elsewhere to be found. 
Wealth may buy fields, add farm to farm, build elegant 
mansions, garnish them with costly furniture, procure 
downy beds, rich viands, sumptuous apparel, and provide 
means of entertainment and improvement in travel, and 
varied amusements, and literary advantages. But it 
cannot buy happiness. Moroseness may be found on 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



175 



sofas, contention may embitter the richest feasts. Ill- 
nature may stalk through splendid halls, jealousy and 
envyings may travel over land and seas, and discontent 
and animosities dwell amidst the refinements of luxury 
and in the libraries of learning. The health and out- 
ward prosperity of a family, though great blessings, will 
not ensure happiness. If the mind is ill at ease, and the 
heart worn with sinful passions, the greatest success in 
business will fail to gratify, and health of body will af- 
ford no satisfaction. Into the best ordered household, 
affliction will intrude. Honoured parents must wax old 
and feeble, and descend to the grave. Perhaps, sickness 
and death seize on blooming youth or prattling childhood. 
Reverses of fortune may come. In such hours of sorrow, 
the religion of the gospel alone offers a sure consolation. 
" Is any afflicted, let him pray." The members of the 
stricken household are not left to the vain and hollow 
language of condolence under sorrow, which is all that 
the world has to offer. They know in whom they have 
believed. The death that has entered the dwelling, is 
but the messenger of a Father in heaven. It may have 
taken a father from earth, but the widow and orphans 
know who is " the Father of the fatherless," and "the 
God of the widow." While the tears of a natural grief 
are flowing for the dead, faith looks beyond the tomb, 
and with confidence and joy, points to reunion in heaven. 
Even by the cold remains of the mother of his children, 
the bereaved husband finds consolation in the assurance, 
that God has sent that heaviest of all his earthly sorrows, 
as the chastisement of a Father, who is too wise to err, 
and too gracious to afflict without reason. 



176 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



We do not say that religion in the family is an insur- 
ance against poverty. Yet it is true, that the truly pious 
family is seldom reduced to utter destitution. God is, how- 
ever, often pleased to permit his people to feel, that this 
world is not their home, by allowing them to meet re- 
verses in fortune, or to fail in such accumulations, as 
exempt them from all hardships and suffering in their out- 
ward estate. But religion brings contentment, which 
" with godliness is great gain." It brings a good con- 
science, which, itself, is full compensation for the richest 
luxuries of ill-gotten wealth. It brings hopes for the fu- 
ture, which sustain under the heaviest ills of the present. 

Often also, acting on the energies and elevating the 
moral character, it disposes to vigorous enterprise, and 
secures the confidence of others ; so that the pious fre- 
quently retrieve their lost estates, while others sink in 
despair or become the victims of vice. 

We are well aware, that there are many families, in 
which true piety does not dwell, who yet enjoy much of 
that family peace and order, prosperity and happiness, 
which we have ascribed to the power of religion in the 
households of the pious. But this fact rather confirms 
than weakens our estimate of the value of religion in the 
family. In such cases, the general influence of the prin- 
ciples of true piety may operate, although the members 
of the household have not personally experienced its 
power. Their blessings have come to them reflected, as 
it were, from others. Those virtues which distinguish 
such families are Christian virtues, in a modified form. 
They are the fruits of the Christian system of truth, 
whose power will be felt in a Christian land. If the par- 



FAMILY RELIGION. 177 

tial operation of that system produces such benefits, what 
may its full influence effect ? If we wish to test the re- 
sults of dispensing with religion in the family, we must 
make our investigations in heathen lands. There w T e shall 
discover in the utter destitution of domestic virtues, the 
degradation of woman, the cruel tyranny of man, and the 
miseries and wretchedness of helpless children, the value 
of religion in the family. 

II. Happy homes make a happy state. That happi- 
ness which implies a measure of worldly prosperity, is 
but the result of that purer happiness, which springs up 
in renewed hearts. Were all the members of all families 
actuated by the principles of true piety, the whole land 
wo aid be enjoying the blessings of a true reformation. 
Thus the true method to secure national blessings, both in 
the destruction of vice and the promotion of virtue, is to 
secure family blessings. 

We have already spoken of the value of religion in the 
family to the Church. We need therefore say the less 
as to its value to the State. For the members of the one 
are citizens of the other. Still the topic is too interest- 
ing and instructive, to be passed over without a few 
hints. 

1. Families, reared under Christian influences, provide 
a healthy population. This is the true capital of a na- 
tion. This is needed to fill the ranks of the army, man 
the navy, fell the forests, till the land, build roads, erect 
cities, construct and employ machinery, and carry on the 
great enterprises of commerce. The nation, however, not 
only needs able men, but industrious, active, energetic 
men. True religion is a foe to idleness and indolence, 



178 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



and from well trained households, go forth the recruits to 
the ranks of useful labour, with the hand and the head. 
Not only will the incentives to effort, which the wants of 
a family supply to its head, urge him to active effort ; but 
the principles of true piety will induce him to train his 
children to useful occupation. As population is the cap- 
ital, so productive labour is the income of a nation. And 
the mighty resources of the wealthiest people are but the 
aggregates of those of individuals. The pampered chil- 
dren of luxury and prodigality born to consume the fruits 
of the earth, are but the blots and blanks on the pages 
of a nation's history, while the well trained sons of honest 
industry form the material for its glory and renown. 

2. Christian families provide law-abiding citizens, 
faithful agents, and upright rulers. The child trained 
to obey parents, is thus trained to obey magistrates. 
The citizen of the household of faith is the best citizen 
for the commonwealth. The habits of self-denial, gen- 
erosity, forbearance, good temper, order, peace, truthful- 
- ness, and honesty, in which he has been trained, will lead 
him to be just in his dealings, public spirited, submissive 
to law, quiet and contented, peaceful and faithful. He will 
not be contentious, a wrangler, deceitful, dishonest, in- 
triguing, and quarrelsome. The elements of mobs and 
insurrections and riots, the inmates of penitentiaries, and 
the subjects for the hangman, do not come out of Chris- 
tian families. Mechanics, pilots, engineers, merchants, 
artisans, and even day labourers, who are entrusted, 
more or less, with the lives, or property, or material in- 
terests of others, may be fully capable in knowledge, or 
skill, or physical ability, and yet, if destitute of moral 



FAMILY RELIGION, 



179 



principle, may fail of success. Now it is no small mat- 
ter, that such should be well trained in Christian house- 
holds. And it deserves the serious attention of all con- 
cerned, to enquire whether those who are prepared to 
disobey God, by violating the Sabbath in the service of 
men, may not either by the loss of physical vigour which 
often follows such service, or the want of moral princi- 
ple, jeopard the interests of employers and the public. 

The best school for rulers is the school of obedience. 
The principles of honesty, integrity, truthfulness, and 
faithfulness, which fit men for the duties of common life, 
are as indispensable to fit them for the highest places of 
authority. Incorruptible judges, virtuous statesmen, 
conscientious lawyers, upright jurors, truthful witnesses, 
honest tax-gatherers, are the proper produce of Christian 
families. Even generals and captains in the navy make 
better servants of the country by being God-fearing men. 
The greatest difference observable in Washington and 
Napoleon, was the difference in moral character. Wash- 
ington's mother said, " George was always a good boy." 
Napoleon's education, however complete for the camp or 
the helm of state, left him deficient in moral principle. 
Whether the snows of Russia or the armies of England 
be most entitled to the credit of his downfall, in the 
view of the historian, the moralist can hardly avoid 
connecting it with that same overleaping ambition which 
Fed him to repudiate the wife of his heart for the empress 
of his dominions. 

3. As national wealth is the aggregate of individual, 
Christian families contribute to it, both by their influence 
on the industrial interests of the country, and their power 



180 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



to sustain themselves. All the common virtues, of which 
we have spoken, enter into the composition of charac- 
ter which secures success in life. Every self-sustaining 
family adds to the public wealth by diminishing public 
burdens. The bulk of paupers and recruits for alms- 
houses are the vicious or their victims. The Christian 
family may be needy, but it is seldom entirely dependent 
on charity. The honest, hard working Christian man, 
though poor, who rears his family to be independent and 
also to habits of frugality, enterprise, and thrift, is a 
public benefactor, worth more to the state than a dozen 
brawling pot-house demagogues or partisan editors. Let 
our constitutions be destroyed, our capitols burned, our 
rulers driven off, and anarchy take the place of a 
well ordered government; yet, if our land were still 
covered over with Christian households, all this frame- 
work of government might be easily restored. But de- 
stroy our Christian families and those which are reared 
and governed by Christian principles, and let the sacred 
words, home, husband, wife, father, mother, brother, sis- 
ter, master, and servant become obsolete, marriage be 
despised, authority discarded, and the ties of the family 
sundered ; then would the wisest laws be of no avail ; an- 
archy and tyranny would run wildly over our land, bruis- 
ing with the heel and blasting with the breath the growth 
of a Christian civilization now rising to bless an admir- 
ing world. The value of religion in the family would be 
seen in the downfall of our greatness, and on the ruins 
of this mighty empire might be inscribed " Lo ! this 
was a nation which feared not God !" 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



181 



Sec. II. The difficulties of Family Religion. 

On this topic we shall offer but a few hints. The lead- 
ing obstacles in the way of promoting family piety have 
already been intimated, in stating the duties of the va- 
rious members of the household, or will properly be de- 
tailed in discussing the pleas for the neglect of such duties. 

1. Many parents find themselves very much embarrassed, 
in an honest effort to train up their children in the way 
of the Lord, by the habits of their neighbours. Some 
are addicted to Sunday visiting, and annoy a Christian 
family with unseasonable attentions. The children of 
such parents, unused to restraints or religious teachings, 
may, perhaps, address to those of a Christian household, 
the language of sneers and ridicule, and mischievously 
endeavour to excite them to rebel against parental au- 
thority. That fort is in danger where assailants have 
allies within its enclosure ; so children of Christian pa- 
rents, whose hearts are naturally predisposed to reject 
authorities and cast off restraint, are in great danger of 
falling an easy prey to those who endeavour to draw 
them aside. This difficulty often arises, also, from the 
associations of children in boarding-schools, where they 
are removed from the inspection of parents, and that 
constantly restraining and correcting influence, which 
daily association with them at home, and the weekly 
recurring Sabbath lessons might produce. The shame 
of singularity in that which is right, while there may be 
a glorying in being the " inventor" and leader " of evil 
things," is one of the sad evidences of man's alienation 
from God. Many parents have found the instructions 
of years almost effaced from the hearts of their children, 
16 



182 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



by not using proper means to prevent the existence or 
influence of the difficulty arising from evil associates 
among children. It is sometimes very difficult to regu- 
late those associations. Happily in our country we have 
no privileged orders. The vulgar affectation of aristo- 
cracy of family or wealth, in which some indulge, is a 
ridiculous folly, for which it is hard to be charitable. 
Still, there may, and ought to be, distinctions in society, 
based on moral worth. To make such distinctions in the 
selection of the company of children, requires the exer- 
cise of a sound discretion, lest by reason of their natural 
rashness and imprudence of speech, they involve them- 
selves and parents in trouble. Parents may do much to 
secure the desired object by cultivating the friendship 
and intercourse of families, containing children of suita- 
ble character, and in selecting schools, whose teachers 
are pious, and will have a wise regard to the character 
and influence of their pupils. 

2. But there are many adult persons who give rise to 
great difficulties, hindering the proper influence of family 
religious teaching. Thus there are some thoughtless, 
and yet good natured friends, who show much mistaken 
kindness to children and youth, by allowing them, when 
their visitors, privileges and indulgences, which are for- 
bidden at home. They may even comment on, what they 
term, the needless strictness of parental control. Some- 
times we find a class of men and women who seem to 
take delight in producing mischief. They are gossips, 
and spend their time in retailing rumours. 

They not only exercise a pernicious influence on chil- 
dren, by affecting their minds with distrust of religious 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



183 



friends, but they may sow seeds of jealousy and dissen- 
sion in the minds of husbands and wives, or mislead 
masters as to servants, or servants as to masters. Among 
such too, are often found those, who are not only the 
captives, but servants of Satan, and who go about seek- 
ing whom they may mislead. They may not traduce re- 
ligion, as they understand it, or vilify and slander its 
professors as hypocrites. On the contrary, they profess 
great reverence for the Bible. But the doctrines which 
they receive, are of a loose, undefined character, and the 
duties they profess to regard as most important, are of a 
questionable morality, or a mere compliance with some 
specious formalism. They are enemies of creeds, con- 
fessions, and catechisms, and all those Scripture truths, 
which most exalt God and humble man. They have 
certain set, stale speeches, about the amiability of hu- 
man nature and a liberal Christianity. The moral in- 
fluence of the drama, and the benefits of such innocent 
amusements, as card-playing and dancing, and the pleas- 
ures of genteel flirtations, intrigues, and dram-drinking 
are their favourite topics. Such persons are often er found 
in our large towns and cities, but there are less to be 
feared, because better known, and parents can more 
easily guard their children against their wiles. They 
often appear in villages and rural districts, where they 
are not well known, and by the influence of those facti- 
tious aids, derived from the dress and manners of city 
or foreign life, often exert a most pernicious power in 
undoing, on the minds of youth, the good work of parental 
training. 

In new settlements, where sound religious public sen- 



184 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



timent has not yet gained an ascendency, the youth of 
Christian households, and, indeed, all its members are 
subjected to the influence of evil associates, who may not 
designedly do them an injury, but whose character is un- 
worthy of imitation, and whose intercourse is either pro- 
fane, or wholly worldly. The staple of their conversation 
is the discussion of fights, quarrels, betting, card-playing, 
drinking, the theatre, horse-race, and circus. Their 
language is grammatically as vulgar, as their sentiments 
are immoral. Those, who, in the selection of new homes, 
make their choice, solely in view of the advantages of 
making money, often sacrifice the more important privi- 
leges of their families, in respect of moral and mental 
improvement. It would be better to live on harder fare 
and accumulate less property, than to rear wealthy fa- 
milies, grown up under the droppings of Satan's minis- 
trations. 

For all such difficulties as have been noticed, parents 
must prepare, by the more careful teaching of their chil- 
dren, by special warnings, and by attaching them to 
themselves. They must early accustom their children 
to repose implicitly on their counsel, and endeavour to 
make home replete with attractive means of happiness. 
Let them aim to preoccupy the heart with good, as the 
best means of excluding evil influences, whether from 
playmates, godless companions, sceptical teachers, or 
imprudent neighbours. Let them not be discouraged by 
those or other difficulties, arising from the perverseness 
of children or servants, the innate opposition of the heart 
to religious truth, or the natural volatility and fickleness 
of youth* No valuable result is ever attained without 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



185 



the use of appropriate means and the exertion of great 
diligence, unwearied watchfulness, and unfailing perseve- 
rance. Those who find difficulties in their own tempers, 
or in the varied tempers and dispositions of children, are 
already instructed in the best means to be employed for 
their removal. All who wish to know and do their duty, 
will find all needed grace, if they seek it from the Fa- 
ther of mercies, and the God of all grace and conso- 
lation. 

Sec. III. The aids to Family Religion. 

1. Corresponding to the class of difficulties, of which 
we have chiefly spoken, is the aid by which parents may 
be assisted in their holy work, afforded by good associ- 
ates. Such, among children, are often found in the fa- 
milies of the pious, of whatever position in society. But, 
as even the best children are not always entirely reliable, 
parents ought to be careful to ascertain the character of 
the influence exerted on their own children by those of 
others. By proper training, young persons may them- 
selves be led, at a very early age, to be good judges of 
the character of those with whom they associate. 

But the aid of good company is to be sought, rather 
from the association in families of adults, whose literary 
and moral advantages and attainments will make their 
conversation edifying, and their examples worthy of im- 
itation. Parental preferences will greatly influence those 
of children. As reading biography is exceedingly in- 
teresting and improving to the young, so associating with 
good men and women cannot fail to exercise a whole- 
some influence in the formation of their characters. It 
is peculiarly important, that persons of decided Christian 
16* 



186 



FAMILY KELIGION. 



character should be thus brought into their society. They 
will learn that the idle talk of worldlings and the flip- 
pant jests of coxcombs and flirts respecting such per- 
sons are unfounded, and be led to admire Christianity 
in the persons of those who exemplify its principles. 
As youth grow up to adult age, they will continue to 
prefer such companions, and their influence on their set- 
tlement in life will continue to be salutary, leading to 
proper connections in business or marriage, judicious se- 
lections of a home, and wise plans for the whole course 
of life. 

2. The work of religious instruction in the family de- 
rives great aid from well conducted Sabbath-schools. 
These schools are not designed to be substitutes for home 
teaching, when parents are capable of performing their 
duties. That too many thus misuse them, has led some 
to depreciate their value. But this is wrong. Rather 
let the fault of parents be checked. Such institutions 
are too valuable, as supplying the only means of reli- 
gious instruction to thousands of destitute children, to be 
discarded, because indolent, self-indulgent parents choose 
to devolve on others their own peculiar duties. 

But while continuing as zealously as ever to instruct 
children at home, parents can derive valuable aid to 
regularity and system, so important in all departments of 
instruction, by making the Sabbath-school lesson, at least 
in part, the home lesson also. Thus will the child not only 
be more certainly prepared for the duties of the class, 
but he will be incited and encouraged by having the care 
and interest of parents manifested in his behalf. The sup- 
port thus given to the teacher's authority and instructions, 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



187 



"will be also some just compensation for his self-denying 
and arduous labour. 

The aid of the Sabbath-school is valuable also to the 
older children, who, by engaging in its duties, as teach- 
ers, continue to improve in Divine knowledge, and ac- 
quire early habits of usefulness and benevolence. The 
Sabbath-schools for servants will afford a field of special 
advantage to all, who will engage in the laudable effort 
to give them religious instruction. 

3. We most cheerfully recognize our excellent religious 
newspapers, and the publications of our Board, as most 
valuable and efficient helps in training a family in the 
knowledge and love of true piety. Of the latter, we 
have now a large number and variety, well adapted to 
the wants of all the members of a family, and especially 
the younger. So all the families in our church can be 
supplied, on very moderate terms, with religious news- 
papers, edited by some of our most eminent ministers. 
In all such, there has been introduced, of late years, a 
special department, called the " Children's Column ;" 
and then the Board of Publication issues a paper en- 
tirely devoted to their instruction and entertainment. • 

The judicious use of these books and newspapers is 
attended with manifest advantage to the intellectual and 
moral improvement of youth. A well edited paper of 
any kind is a great blessing to the children of a family, 
by inducing them to form habits of reading. They may 
also gather an immense amount of useful knowledge. 
Especially, do religious newspapers confer great bene- 
fits ; for, to the mental improvement, they add high 
moral influences. Children, habituated to such reading, 



188 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



have their minds familiarized with the truths, which they 
hear from the pulpit, read in the Bible, or learn from 
parents. They become instructed in the condition and 
plans of the church, and its growth and agency in dis- 
seminating the gospel, and may be thus led to take a 
more lively interest in the prosperity of Zion. Above all, 
the solemn truths on the subject of personal religion, so 
often found in such papers, may be attended by the 
awakening and renewing power of the Divine Spirit. 

Parents should use a wise discretion in selecting books 
for the perusal of children, adapted to their age and pro- 
gress in knowledge. They also need to attend to their 
manner of reading. Children are fond of novelty, and 
constantly tempted to read carelessly. They may glance 
through a volume, merely for the sake of the story it 
may contain, neglecting the solid instruction to which the 
story is the mere attraction. They will thus grow up 
with very bad habits of reading in a hurried or careless 
manner. They ought, therefore, to be induced to read 
aloud to some one, who will correct their errors of elocu- 
tion ; and should be frequently examined on the contents 
of the books which they may have perused. 

Before leaving this subject, we may remark, that per- 
sons benevolently disposed, may contribute materially to 
aid poor families in the right training of children, by 
supplying them with religious books and newspapers. 
Even many who can afford to procure them, but are indif- 
ferent to their value, when furnished for a time by others, 
might become sufficiently interested to supply them- 
selves. While a direct benefit would be conferred on the 
objects of this benevolent action, an incidental and valu- 



FAMILY RELIGION, 



189 



able service would be performed to a class of laborious 
and useful Christian men, who, amidst much annoyance 
and discouragement, and on very inadequate remuneration, 
are engaged in editing and publishing religious newspa- 
pers. 

4. Our families cannot always continue in health, com- 
fort, and peace. Sickness, losses, bereavements, and 
death are incidental to all households. But even these 
sad events may be properly employed as aids to impress 
the great principles of religious truth on the hearts of all 
in the household. They are sent to confirm the lessons 
of Grod's word, on the vanity of life, the transitory na- 
ture of earthly enjoyments, and the value, reality, and 
permanence of heavenly blessings. Their teaching is 
sad, but not the less valuable. It is often " better to go 
to the house of mourning than to the house of feasting," 
and " by the sadness of the countenance the heart is 
made better." Sometimes that great calamity, orphan- 
age, is overruled to be the source of blessing to children. 
Their early acquaintance with the sad realitites of life, 
produces a seriousness of disposition and proper views of 
their responsibilities, and gives a direction to energies, 
which other, more pleasing, methods might have failed to 
effect. Let us not " despise the chastening of the Lord," 
as an aid to us, in guiding our children, as well as tutor- 
ing ourselves, in the way of life. Often it is true, that 

The path of sorrow, and that path alone, 
Leads to the world where sorrow is unknown. 



190 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



CHAPTER VI. 

THE PLEAS FOR NEGLECT AND DELINQUENCIES IN FAM- 
ILY DUTIES. 

The instincts of nature and self-interest generally 
secure a good measure of faithfulness in the performance 
of those duties, which relate to the physical and mental 
interests of the members of a family. When any neglect 
occurs, the fault is often ascribable to ignorance, or to an 
inadequate apprehension of the benefits which may be 
procured by the performance, or the evils which may re- 
sult from the omission, of duty. In such cases instruc- 
tion and admonition are appropriate. When, however, 
there exists any culpable and pertinacious disregard of 
the obligations to provide for the physical welfare or 
mental improvement of children, it will probably be 
found, that the excuses offered in extenuation or justifi- 
cation of such omissions, are substantially those by which 
a neglect of the moral and religious training of a family 
is usually palliated. Indeed, if this latter work be pro- 
perly performed, the other will rarely be omitted, on any 
such grounds as demand our notice in this connection. 

Few persons, whose opinions are entitled to respect, 
will question the manifest and manifold advantages of 
religion in the family. Christianity enjoys this distin- 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



191 



guishing peculiarity, as a system of religion, that, however 
men may dispute its credibility, object to its doctrines, 
or refuse submission to its laws, they feel constrained to 
do homage to its principles, as illustrated in the lives of 
its votaries. Hence numbers can be found, who, though un- 
willing themselves to be pious, are far from being displeased 
with their friends because they profess and practise the 
principles of Christian faith. Prejudice, the depraved 
passions of the human heart, or ignorance, or all combined, 
may occasionally, even in our highly favoured Christian 
land, induce persons to oppose the religious inclinations 
of their near relatives ; and husbands, wives, parents, or 
children, have been known to evince a most bitter hostil- 
ity, even leading to acts of petty persecution, against 
"them of their own household," who had professed faith 
in Christ. But even in these, now happily, rare and ex- 
treme cases, the hostility has generally been occasioned, 
rather by the principles than conduct of the Christian dis- 
ciple. 

While, however, the beauty of holiness, especially in 
the characters of mothers, fathers, children, brothers, or 
sisters, may be readily conceded, the necessity and im- 
portance of using the appropriate means to secure the 
admired result, are not always properly appreciated. 
This failure may be owing to ignorance or a want of 
consideration, or it is more probably oftener occasioned 
by the sophistical reasonings and cavils of those who 
are ever prepared to hinder the progress of true piety in 
the world. 

Even when the duty of employing such means is pro- 
fessedly acknowledged, many permit themselves to be 



192 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



hindered in its performance by the suggestions of indo- 
lence, or the natural indisposition of the heart, to enter 
with zeal and energy on the fulfilment of moral obli- 
gations. 

1. Some undertake to justify their neglect of parental 
duty, in the religious culture of children, by the allega- 
tion that the opinions of the young on subjects of Chris- 
tian faith ought not to be biassed, but that they should 
be left to exercise their own judgments on matters of 
such importance, when they shall have reached a period 
of life, at which they may be capable of acting for them- 
selves. 

( 1.) This plea sometimes aspires to the dignity of an 
objection, on the ground, that if the alleged duty is ob- 
ligatory on any, it is one of common obligation, and 
that, when performed by parents, who are zealous parti- 
sans of religious error, it becomes the instrument of 
propagating such error, and thus of doing evil instead 
of good. 

We cannot deny, that, in view of the great injury in- 
flicted on mankind, by the various systems of false reli- 
gion and perverted Christianity, which have been in- 
stilled into the tender and susceptible minds of youth, 
there is some plausibility in this view when first pre- 
sented. Still we think that it will be found only plaus- 
ible. 

For, admitting that, by early religious instruction, 
many have been led astray and made the victims of per- 
nicious error, it remains to be proved, that, if not thus 
instructed, they would have embraced the truth. And 
even granting that moral interests have thus been often 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



193 



sacrificed, we must bear in mind that the wrong applica- 
tion of a good principle is not a sound reason for its re- 
jection. We have often had occasion to advert to the 
fact that the Divine government of this world is a gov- 
ernment of sinful beings, and must not be held responsi- 
ble for the perversion of its wise provisions, which are 
made by the folly and wickedness of men. At every 
turn we shall meet this same difficulty. Even the re- 
straints of God's holy law, the apostle teaches us, have 
been made the occasions of sin by the perverseness of 
the human heart. Rom. vii. 8. 

But we can by no means admit that the moral in- 
terests of a child are necessarily sacrificed, who has been 
placed under a system of religious instruction, by which 
some error has been inculcated. For the most defective 
system, taught by any evangelical denomination of the 
Protestant church, may contain enough truth to produce 
a saving influence, under the divine blessing. Even in 
papal countries, with all the prevailing superstitions and 
the infidelity engendered by them, some religious bene- 
fits may be secured by the religious instruction given, 
which presents a pleasing contrast to the condition of 
one left in a state of utter ignorance of Divine truth. 
We by no means advocate indifference as to the system 
of religious faith, under which children are reared, and 
yet, there might be cases, in which it would be better for 
children to be brought up under the tuition of a Christ- 
less Unitarianism or Universalism, or even Judaism it- 
self, than that they should be left to be the prey of the 
devil, under the leadings of their own depraved natures. 
We are well aware of the great difficulty which the preju- 
17 



194 FAMILY RELIGION. 

diced attachment to error, interposes to the entrance 
of truth ; yet as all error is only a form of sin, it may, 
at least, admit of a doubt, whether we would not do bet- 
ter to risk the mingling of error with some truth, than to 
leave the mind, fully preoccupied with sinful propensi- 
ties, in the darkness of an utter ignorance of Divine reve- 
lation. 

(2.) The alleged impolicy of a religious education is 
partly based on the presumption, that the mind of a 
child, if not inclined to what is good, is naturally un- 
biassed, and will as readily select what is right, as that 
which is wrong. But that such is by no means a correct 
view of our nature, both Scripture and a discriminating 
observation abundantly prove. We need only refer to 
the first and third chapters of the Epistle to the Ro- 
mans, as presenting a summary of the inspired declara- 
tions on this subject, which other portions of the Bible 
fully corroborate. The universal and total depravity of 
the race is the only theory of man's moral nature, con- 
sistent with those facts of his history, patent in all the 
records of the race, that the peace and order of society, 
safety of life and property, the dispensation of justice 
and the practice of truth, have never been secured, ex- 
cept by the restraints of law and the curbs of govern- 
ment. 

So far, then, from being disposed by nature, to that 
which is right, or even indisposed to that which is wrong, 
the child is already " wholly inclined to all evil," " disa- 
bled," and naturally opposed to all that is good, born 
with a propensity to imbibe erroneous principles and 
pursue sinful practices. This corrupt nature, left to an 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



195 



unchecked development, is not merely the source of all 
" actual transgression," ( Confession of Faith, vi. 4,) but 
it is the source of ungodliness and transgression only, 
" and that continually." It is a sheer folly to admonish 
us against the dangers of a religious bias, when there 
already exists a sinful bias, and the power of Satan, and 
the delusions of a wicked world are constantly engaged 
to strengthen its force. 

( 3.) But if the plea now before us possesses any va- 
lidity to justify the neglect of that religious education, 
for which we have contended in the foregoing chapters, 
it may be urged, with as much plausibility, if not equal 
pertinency, to justify a neglect of every kind and meas- 
ure of religious or moral teaching. The practical prin- 
ciples of sound morality are sustained by the fundamen- 
tal doctrines of revealed truth. We need not here dis- 
cuss this proposition. That there may have existed im- 
perfect codes of morals, in lands on which the light of 
the gospel never shone, is true. But, we shall search in 
vain, in all the records of our race, for a system so com- 
plete, as that which rests on the doctrines of the word 
of God. A comparison of the moral condition of the 
most enlightened ancient or modern heathen nation, 
with that of Christian nations, in which the most imper- 
fect forms of Christianity have prevailed, will show, that 
the latter have enjoyed the benefits of a much sounder 
morality than the former. 

Now such doctrines of revealed religion as the being 
and nature of God, man's responsibility, the state of re- 
wards and punishments hereafter, are doctrines which 
men do not receive by nature, and for the right appre- 



196 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



hension of which they need instruction. For even grant- 
ing that men will, as well as may, know the " eternal 
power and Godhead," by the "things which are seen," 
( Rom. i. 20,) still it is notorious, that all have not fol- 
lowed the light of nature. The heathen needed instruct- 
ed in its teachings, and among the most enlightened na- 
tions of the heathen world atheism has existed. Then 
there must be religious teaching as to some truths. In- 
deed, without it, we could easily show that the whole 
world must ultimately drift to a state of most deplorable 
darkness. If no religious training must be given on 
propositions, which may be subjects of debate, lest we 
unduly bias the mind and invade the rights of conscience, 
then might society soon be deprived of the benefits ari- 
sing from the sanction of an oath. If children are to 
be left without instruction in the doctrine of the existence 
of God, we know not how soon that would become as 
much doubted and rejected, as the petty dogmas of some 
mere sectarian policy. So all the questions of morals 
involving the safety of life and the rights of property, 
must follow the doctrines of revealed religion, in being 
placed among the topics on which instruction must be 
declined, because they admit of debate. We cannot con- 
template with equanimity, the prospect of a nation, left 
to the full consequences which must flow from the practi- 
cal admission of the plea, which we are now considering. 
It is said, that Coleridge once replied to a friend, who 
had urged it, by showing him his garden, which had 
grown up in weeds, because he had neglected to " preju- 
dice it" in favour of fruits and flowers. So, unless chil- 
dren are "prejudiced" in favour of religious doctrines, 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



197 



and the love and practice of justice, generosity, honesty, 
and truth, they will grow up in infidelity, and the love 
and practice of fraud and cruelty, hatred, revenge, and 

lying. 

Nor is it a fair reply to these suggestions, to say that 
it is proper to teach those things, on which there is a 
general agreement among men, while those of a limited 
reception should be omitted from our instructions ; for 
the popularity of a proposition in morals is not conclu- 
sive of its truth, nor the popular rejection of it, an evi- 
dence of its falsehood ; and the question raised by this 
plea does not relate to the degree of doubt pertaining 
to such propositions, but to the existence of any differ- 
ence of opinion whatever. If we may teach one set of 
truths which some question, so may we teach another. 
If then the Christian parent is persuaded of the truth of 
the religious system which he has adopted, it is both his 
right and duty to inculcate it on the mind of his child. 
If the so called prejudices are right, and such as he be- 
lieves that the sound reason and enlightened conscience 
of the child will afterwards sanction, then, by all means, 
he should endeavour to preoccupy its mind with them. 
And this he should do, at as early a period of the child's 
life as possible. We all admit the importance of teach- 
ing children the arts and sciences, the principles of or- 
dinary morality, and even the manners of polite society. 
And all feel, that the earlier we inculcate the lessons on 
these subjects the better. Early impressions are most 
durable, and early habits the most uneradicable. We do 
not wait till children can appreciate the propriety, or 

understand the reasons of the principles of such morals 
17* 



198 



FAMILY KELIGION. 



or manners. It is enough, that we feel persuaded they 
ought to be instructed and trained to observe them. 
Now, if we feel that it is right and important thus to 
teach them those things to which they have no natural 
aversion, but, on the contrary, for the learning of which 
they may be inclined, by a regard to their own interest, 
the example and influence of others, or any similar rea- 
son; how much more should we feel impelled to use 
every care for training them to the reception of truths, 
and the adoption of practices, to which they are by na- 
ture disinclined ! In the former case, we may be incited 
to duty by a consideration of the ignorance or indolence 
of our children ; much more then should we be moved to 
our duty in the latter, by bearing in mind, that we have 
to contend not only with ignorance and indolence, but 
with a decided repugnance to truth and an inveterate per- 
verseness of heart. 

2. In direct contradiction of the inspired promise, that 
if a child is trained up in the " way he should go, when 
he is old, he will not depart from it," (Prov. xxii. 6,) it 
has been often said, that the result produced by religious 
education will be the opposite to that which is proposed. 
"We are told that children, who have been restrained 
from certain indulgences when young, acquire a greater 
desire and relish for them, when they reach adult age ; 
and that to those religious truths which are urged on their 
attention, and to those outward religious duties with 
which they are forced to comply in early life, they will 
become even more strongly averse, when released from 
parental control. 

We have really hesitated somewhat on the introduc- 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



199 



tion of this excuse for neglect of parental duties, for, to 
some readers, it must appear exceedingly strange, that 
any persons can thus so openly contradict the Divine 
testimony. But, however shocking to pious minds this 
palpable insult to God may appear, we are fully per- 
suaded that either in its bald impudence, or under the guise 
of some modifying expressions, this plea is often advanced. 
Some undertake to sustain its truth, by the repetition of 
the stale slander, that the children of the pious are, or- 
dinarily, worse than those of others. A feeble attempt 
to reconcile the obvious contradiction of God's word 
which this plea presents, is offered in the suggestion, 
that no religious training is such as God's word requires, 
and hence, since our imperfect endeavours are so uni- 
formly failures, they had better be altogether abandoned. 
But it is not our province to discuss this or any other 
method of reconciling the explicit assurances of God's 
word with the contradictory positions to which men may 
be led, either by indisposition to accept the Divine de- 
claration, or the sophistical reasonings of themselves or 
others. We have long regarded the existence and use of 
this plea as a most striking exemplification of the inspired 
teaching, that " the carnal mind is enmity against God, 
for it is not subject to the law of God." Rom. viii. 7. 

As to the alleged facts adduced to sustain the posi- 
tion before us, we may remark, that they have never 
been well authenticated. It is possible there may have 
been many professing Christians and ministers, who have, 
like Eli, been culpably remiss in duty. There have, 
doubtless, been some who have been too stern in rebuke, 
too severe in punishment, too rigorous in requisitions ; 



200 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



or, on the contrary, others who have been too lax in dis- 
cipline, too lenient to the guilty, or too indulgent to the 
indolent. All have, doubtless, failed in some respect, 
and come short of performing acknowledged duties. 
Still, after much reflection and observation, we are free 
to express the conviction, that we find much more rea- 
son to admire the distinguishing forbearance and faith- 
fulness of our God, in so eminently blessing the religious 
education of children, though conducted with so much 
imperfection, and fulfilling his promises, though so often 
forfeited by the sinful omissions of his people, than to 
doubt or question the truth of the inspired declaration, 
or the wisdom of that family economy, for which it pro- 
vides both the foundation and encouragement. 

On the other hand, the facts already stated may be 
safely relied on to repel the slanderous allegation, by 
which it is proposed to impugn the truth of God's word. 
Other facts of the same kind may be gathered from the 
history of the church. A few years since, some statis- 
tics were collected in New England, with special refer- 
ence to this subject. From these we have selected a 
few statements : 

Of one hundred and forty one children, fifteen years old 
and upwards, in the families of thirty-five ministers, about 
one hundred were found hopefully pious, of whom nine- 
teen were devoted to the ministry. Only four sons were 
intemperate. The mother of one of them was not pious. 

In the families of one hundred and seventy-two dea- 
cons,* there were seven hundred and ninety-six children, 

* In the congregational churches of New England, the Deacon cor- 
responds in office to the Kuling Elder of our churches. 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



201 



fifteen years old, and upwards, of whom about five hun- 
dred were hopefully pious, and seventeen were ministers. 
Sixteen were intemperate. The fathers of five of these 
used strong drink, or opposed a temperance reform. The 
remaining two hundred and eighty four were, with few 
exceptions, respectable and useful citizens. Now let 
there be selected from irreligious households, in which re- 
ligious training is rejected or neglected, an equal num- 
ber of families and children, and we unhesitatingly as- 
sert, that like numbers of professors of religion and min- 
isters will not be found. And even should such be found, 
in order to sustain the position that religious teaching is 
injurious, it must be further proved, that those of the 
first class became pious in spite of the instruction they 
had received ; and those of the latter, by reason of the 
ignorance in which they had been left. 

It is true that grace does not run in the blood, but 
God's promise is sure, and God's precept will be ever sus- 
tained by his dispensations. The kingdom of providence 
is subservient to the kingdom of grace. As to the al- 
leged propensity of children, to seek with greater avidity, 
when of age and free from control, those indulgences 
from which they had been restrained in early life, we may 
freely concede, that there is a melancholy proclivity of 
our nature to rush after what is forbidden, and to hate 
what is productive of our best interests. It is the testi- 
mony of inspiration that "a fool" (i. e., wicked person) 
despiseth his father's instruction," Prov. xv. 5, that "fool- 
ishness is bound in the heart of a child," Prov. xxii. 15, 
that "fools hate knowledge," Prov. i. 22, and "make a 
mock at sin." Prov. xiv. 9. But so far from admitting 



202 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



that these evidences of a sinful nature, should constitute 
a reason for omitting all efforts to inculcate a love for 
truth and the fear of God, they supply very strong incen- 
tives to use the utmost diligence, in our efforts for the 
religious culture of children. If indeed we adopt the 
principle, that we must omit all such efforts for fear of 
producing results contrary to what we propose to accom- 
plish, then, to be consistent, we must dispense with all 
training, by which we propose to effect any change in the 
natural disposition of children. They must be left to learn 
the most ordinary yet most important moral duties of 
life, after they shall have become habituated to neglect 
them. Even the manners of social intercourse must be 
regarded as forbidden topics of parental teaching. Chil- 
dren must be left to rude and boorish methods of be- 
haviour, lest the effort to teach them suavity and polite- 
ness might inspire them with a dislike to the customs of 
civilized society. They must be left to grow up in igno- 
rance, lest the offered teachings of letters and useful 
science might be rejected with repugnance. Or, if by 
compulsion we should succeed in enforcing judicious coun- 
sels and restraints in such matters, and securing some 
progress in knowledge, we must expect, that as our sons 
and daughters reach the period, when, released from our 
control, they may indulge their pent up propensities, 
they will greedily resort to the vulgarities of low life, 
break off all the habits and usages of good society, luxu- 
riate in indolence and idleness, and disdainfully discon- 
tinue the pursuit of all mental improvement ! To escape 
the conclusions to which these suggestions lead, it may 
be said, that the alleged results of religious training do 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



203 



not flow from any necessary proclivity in the child's na- 
ture to oppose instruction on all subjects, but is due to 
their natural antipathy to religious truth. If this be so, 
then surely it is highly important that we use the greater 
zeal and diligence, not only to instil good principles, but 
to eradicate this deadly hostility to their reception, lest it 
become too deeply fixed, ever to allow their entrance in 
after life. 

Once more, there are not a few who do, practically, 
oppose the instruction and discipline of youth, in any de- 
partment of knowledge or duty, to which they manifest 
repugnance. The great bulk of children thus neglected 
grow up practical demonstrations of the impolicy, or 
rather wickedness, of such neglect. By their unculti- 
vated manners, gross ignorance, and idle, vicious habits, 
they bring disgrace on parents and ruin on themselves. 
Some few, notwithstanding this parental folly, under the 
influence of society to which they are subject, may ac- 
quire propriety of behaviour, good habits of ordinary 
morality, and a respectable degree of mental improvement, 
and thus escape such sad results. But it must be consid- 
ered, that while the influence of society may supply the 
defects of training, in the ordinary duties and decencies of 
life, to which children may have no very strong disincli- 
nation, or a disinclination which may be overcome by 
the incentives of self interest, we are not permitted to rely 
on similar causes and expect similar results, as to the 
principles and practices of a vital piety. To these, as al- 
ready stated, the heart is naturally opposed, and even in 
the best state of society, the influences to which youth are 
constantly exposed, so far from tending to overcome, ra- 



204 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



ther tend to increase, such disinclination. The boys in 
the street, wicked men and women in their homes, the ex- 
ample and solicitations of the votaries of sin, and the al- 
lurements of the world, of every sort, and in all the scenes 
of opportunity and temptation, are continually drawing 
children aside to evil, and opposing all the best efforts of 
parents to train them in the way they should go. If the 
garden be neglected, the soil, prolific of weeds, will 
be luxuriant in a noxious growth. 

3. There are many special pleas urged, under the in- 
fluence of peculiar circumstances, or in excuse for the 
neglect of particular duties, not admitting any classifica- 
tion, which deserve a brief notice. Such of these as re- 
late to the great duty of family worship, are so well and so 
summarily disposed of in the concluding chapter of the 
work often cited, that, by a reference to it, we omit all 
farther allusion to them. 

(1.) The intimacy of the family relation is often sug- 
gested, as a reason for the failure of husbands and wives 
to stir up each other's minds, on the great concerns of 
salvation, or of parents to converse with their children on 
the duties of personal piety. There may be a proper 
degree of diffidence in our abilities, to be the instructers 
of others, more painfully experienced, when the very 
solemn interests of our near and dear relatives are to be 
affected by our counsels. Still, it is much to be feared, 
that this plea has its true origin, either in a conscious- 
ness that our lives are inconsistent with our theories and 
professions, or that we are not sufficiently impressed with 
a sense of the pressing necessity of personal religion, in 
those who are members of our families. Sometimes in- 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



205 



deed, there may arise a false delicacy, as if "the sub- 
ject," to use a popular phraseology in denoting religious 
topics, were one too sacred to be made a topic of familiar 
conversation. We apprehend this plea, under any modi- 
fication, is sufficiently set aside by the suggestion, that 
whenever our own piety is vigorous and active, all" the 
real or supposed difficulties which it presents will van- 
ish. 

( 2.) The plea of a want of time is sometimes presented. 
A similar plea for the neglect of attending to personal 
religion is sometimes offered. In both cases there may 
be a misapprehension of the nature of the duty from 
which exemption is thus claimed. God has so ordered 
that our most diligent performance of the duties pertain- 
ing to our lawful callings, is not only consistent with the 
special duty we owe to him, but we are very much aided 
in the former, by a proper regard for the latter. All 
the duties we are called to perform in promoting our own 
piety, and that of the members of our families, are effec- 
tually operating in the advancement of our best temporal 
interests. And even did our engagement in the religious 
instruction of our children, or other Christian services 
for our families, interfere with the prosecution of our 
proper secular pursuits, the transcendent value of the 
spiritual welfare of our household might justify a sacri- 
fice of some worldly interest for its advantage. 

( 3.) Some endeavour to pacify the demands of a quick- 
ened conscience, especially in regard to the religious in- 
struction of servants, by the plea, that religion is a mat- 
ter between each person and his Maker ; and that if they 
endeavour to serve God sincerely themselves, their chil- 
18 



206 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



dren and servants know their liabilities and duties, and 
must take care to meet them. It is very true that each 
of us must give account of himself to God ; but does it 
never occur to such persons, that a very important part 
of such account will be that which relates to the " deeds 
done in the body," in accordance with requisitions of 
the family constitution? We cannot be pious for others, 
but if God has placed us in the position of a keeper of 
our brother's religious privileges, it is a matter for se- 
rious consideration, that we may be held responsible for 
supplying him with those privileges. Masters and pa- 
rents cannot devolve wholly on others, what their very 
relation to their servants and children has imposed on 
them. 

(4.) In respect to the class of duties to which we have 
just adverted, we often hear neglect palliated on the al- 
legation, that those whom we are called to instruct will 
not heed our lessons. As to both classes of pupils, chil- 
dren and servants, this may very probably be true, when, 
by our sloth and indifference, they have been allowed to 
form habits of inattention to serious things. But if 
proper means are used when they are young, we need 
not fear that our efforts will be rejected. Let us abide 
by the promise, (Prov. xxii. 6,) encouraging as to any 
child, whether our own or that of our servant, m s this 
respect sufficiently subject to our control to enable us to 
perform the duty, on which the promise is suspended. 

( 5.) A want of capacity to instruct and discipline the 
young, is sometimes plead in excuse for neglect. " If 
there be first a willing mind, it is accepted according to 
that a man hath, and not according to that he hath not." 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



207 



2 Cor. viii. 12. This principle of God's gracious gov- 
ernment applies to our duties as well as to our gifts of be- 
nevolence. Let each one do his best. There is not, 
indeed, a requisition for great gifts of knowledge, to teach 
others the essential truths of the gospel, both as to its 
theory and the duties it prescribes. In this respect, this 
wonderful scheme for man's moral welfare resembles 
some vast and complicated machinery, which has been 
so well adjusted, that a little child may set in operation 
a power, which scores or hundreds of men could not, of 
themselves, effect. If the deficiencies of capacity are spe- 
cially such as relate to temper of mind, patience, gentle- 
ness, zeal, and earnestness, they are to be supplied, like all 
other graces, at that throne to which we are invited to 
come for mercy and^grace to help in time of need. 

(6.) Past failure, either of ourselves or others, is no 
valid excuse for remitting our efforts. If it has resulted 
from the stupidity or stubbornness of those, who, even in 
early life, have evinced the dreadful perversity of human 
nature, let us call to mind God's long-suffering and patient 
forbearing toward us. If, however, it has resulted from 
our past delinquencies, then, indeed, should we rather 
be humbled and penitent, and knowing that God giveth 
liberally to all, and upbraideth none, seek from him for- 
giveness for the past, and wisdom to direct, and strength 
to aid us for the future ; that with a livelier zeal, and a 
more persevering endeavour, we may be led "to do good 
and communicate," as we have "opportunity." Our 
humblest efforts will not escape his regard, and our suc- 
cess, so far as it shall be for his glory, will form part of 



208 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



that blessedness, which those shall receive, who shall 
hereafter enter into the joy of their Lord. 

This discussion has strengthened us in convictions long 
entertained, and to which we fain hope it may be instru- 
mental in leading the minds of those who may honour 
this little work with a perusal. We feel fully persuaded, 
that in addition to the diligent use of all those valuable 
methods, for increasing the efficiency of the gospel and 
enhancing the power of the pulpit, which God has in- 
clined his people to employ, one of the most important 
enterprises which can now engage the attention of our 
ministers and church courts, is the devising and execu- 
ting the best methods for promoting family religion. 

Let us suppose that all the members of the hundred 
thousand families, reckoned to be connected with the 
Presbyterian church in our country, were led to feel and 
act as they should, in view of their responsibilities and 
duties as taught in the Holy Scriptures, granting all 
that abatement from perfection which human infirmity 
may require, there would yet be thus produced such a 
revival of pure religion as the world has never known. 
There would be such repentance on conviction of past 
short-comings, such endeavours after new obedience, such 
earnest enquiries for direction, such wrestlings in prayer, 
such exercises of faith, such returning to walk in the 
fear of God, as would constitute a scene, on which an- 
gels would look with joy, and for which all good men on 
earth would unite in praising God. It might not be a 
revival, distinguished by any obvious excitement, by any 
undue increase or multiplication of public religious meet- 
ings, by overflowing houses of disorderly curiosity-hun- 



FAMILY RELIGION. 



209 



ters ; or, by accessions of large numbers to the church, 
to be followed by the defection of the large majority of 
such accessions ; but it would be a steady, uninterrupted 
stream of spiritual blessing, consisting in the uniform 
growth of churches in numbers, and the uniform growth 
of their members in true piety; the regular increase of 
candidates for the ministry, the founding of new churches, 
the promotion of peace and order and love, the enlarge- 
ment of missionary enterprises among the heathen, the 
weakening of the kingdom of Satan, the advancement of 
the kingdom of grace, and the hastening of the kingdom 
of glory. 

For such a revival, let all who sustain positions of in- 
fluence and authority in every family, earnestly labour, 
praying for Divine aid and blessing. Let elders stir up 
the minds of Christian parents, husbands, wives, masters, 
and older children, to a right appreciation and earnest 
performance of duty. Especially let us, who are called 
to " labour in word and doctrine," most diligently in- 
struct the people of our charges, in the nature, impor- 
tance, and duties of the family constitution, the means 
by which the great moral purposes of its organization 
may be secured, and the benefits which Christian fami- 
lies confer on the church, the state, and the world. In- 
stead of seeking the enlargement of Zion by some " new 
measures," inconsistent with the tenor of our doctrinal 
system and church order, let us return to the old paths ; 
and by the lawful use of the facilities afforded by our 
chosen modes of worship, and the careful instruction of 
our children in our chosen articles of faith, let us seek 

the blessing of a covenant-keeping God. Let others boast 
18* 



210 



FAMILY EELIGION. 



of what peculiarity of human device or institution they 
may please, but let us adhere to the principles recog- 
nized in our standards and in God's word, that Christian 
families are the elements of the church and the aids of 
its efficiency, and that in their enlargement in numbers 
and growth in the practices of true piety, the church 
itself will thrive,' filling earth with the blessings, and 
heaven with the glories, of redemption. 



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